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Have You Ever Dated A Black-american?

If you've dated an Black-American (Akata) how was you experience? Good or Bad? How did it differ from dating a fellow Naija?

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@sista women i can tell you are a FREAKY lady ,  YEYE gal

Agudas, Saros and Akatas should not feel offended, they are not nigerians by heritage PERIOD

its a names, i doubt all these names are to offend people, just to differientiate

and they were "collected and sold" KINI big deal

as i say AKATA for americans, i say omo nna or okoroman/woman for Igbos , and they dont get offended, so niether should americans

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clap for yourself then get lost.

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The word "akata" was invented by corrupt dudu Yoruba to denigrate the African Americans who were returning to Yorubaland in the late 19th century and early

20th century. The word was used to put them in an inferior place in society even though they were not inferior in any way. The true meaning of the word is "these are the ones we collected and sold". The corrupt dudu Yoruba wanted to revive shame in the returnees by reminding them of the enslavement of their parents and corrupt dudus involvement in the enslavement and betrayal. In short it was another way of the children of the slave traders and enslavers to mock the children of the freedmen/women. The returnees paved the way for educational advancement and modernization in Yorubaland. They brought technology, skills and money into

Lagos and other parts of Yorubaland. In some ways the returnees were superior especially in intellect and intelligence. I do not call African Americans "akata"

even though I have heard some older people call them that.We have to start teaching children to stop insulting others by calling them foul names.

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You continue to fail to take into account that our countries are very different.

In Nigeria there is no way to track a 'baby daddy" or force him to pay for his child.

In Nigeria it is accepted that the guys will sleep with whomever they want to and that they will do whatever they please.

In Nigeria women pretend not to discuss the very things that we openly discuss; they do it in secret.

In Nigeria women are not given the opp. to succeed as well as women here and provide for their families on their own.

In Nigeria there are heavy sigmas associated with being a single mom that are not prevalent here (they do exist, but not as bad)

There is no way you can start to compare our high single parent homes to your over abused wombs, due to abortion.

All I read is how unexperienced and boring wives are in the bedroom.  If you allowed them to discuss sex among themselves this would open a whole new world to your enjoyment and then maybe you would be forced to find another reason for stepping outside.

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ose ohhh brodah/sista

i enjoyed reading the book you posted, lol

my point is that i feel as though most black americans are not my style of chick

and its not about who having more or less sex , the opendness of americans is to much for my liking

having children out of wedlock in africa, is looked down upon more than america which explains why the term "baby daddy or baby momma" is so widely used

and yes men deny children in africa but i bet that mother will not make that same mistake 3-4 times like many americans do,

i had a convo with an american about blacks being so ghetto and lazy etc and she was offended, and she said "so isn't there disease and poverty in africa", i said yes, but i dont have any diseases and im not in poverty

so it doesn't matter

if you kno you aren't like anything we posted, then congrats you beat the odds, your not the average black american we encountered, which maybe y your husband married you, if he was already a citizen lol

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I cannot believe the ignorance of some of the posters on this board. And no not because it is a Nigerian board but simply because in this day and time, with the availability of internet, satellite TV, and the number of immigrants of ALL countries in All countries, you would think people would not still be so closed mined ed and blind to their inner prejudices.

I can say that ignorance falls on both side of the fence, as there are African Americans that are very biased and uniformed about African culture but reading some of the comments here at this site I see that there are quite a few Africans with very distorted and unrealistic thoughts and ideas about African Americans.

In this day and age there are shameless men and women in ALL cultures. There are babies daddies and babies mamas in ALL cultures. But to comment on that first, I more proud of the babies mommas and daddies that chose to accept the responsibility of their actions than to make us of the fast fix chains aka abortion clinics.

Yes America has a high statistic of unwed mothers but from what I have seen over the years through my friendships with many Africans of many nationalities is   due to the stigma of unwed mothers many women have children but do not claim them as their own, they simply become their sister, brothers, cousins, or some other family member in attempt to hide the shame. Also if better data was kept in Nigeria regarding health and well being, how many children born to unwed mothers would you really find. And I bet the rate of abortion would be just as high if not higher than that of other countries where unwed motherhood is not frowned upon as severely,

Judging by all of my platonic friends (boy and girl) and what I saw when I lived in Naija with my husband, I can honestly say you guys are not having sex any less than we are here in the States and any less than African Americans.

I think what all of this boils down to is mankinds wish to be superior to others. All of mankind shares this trait. We do it to others and we do it to our own. Hence the class system in Nigeria and other cultures in Africa, India, and other parts of Asia. I would give a long speech about how wrong such ideology is but I know that nothing I say will change this unfortunate trait of mankind. I am simply stating the truth and will rely on God and his day to make the changes that need to be made.

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now back to the thread fuckin akatas girls are to damn freaky,ONE akata girl i dated wanted sex all d time, i mean shettt mehn.

always touchin n stuff in public tellin her friends about our sex life n poo. den when ill see her friends theyll be givin me some look, all that "girfirends show and sex and the city," is real oh, they really sit around and talk about their sex lives.

they are good to play with tho but theres only few say out of d population only 10% out of 100% that are marriage material , lets face the AVERAGE black american women is no good

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KB1 Created the thread how can he deter his own thread?

Anyway. Here in Baltimore using the word akata is derogatory and not used on people that black American but married in or close in.

My stepdaughter almost had a heartattack when she heard me use the word and asked that I never refer to myself as such because I am not akata.

All I can go by is what is the normal custom here. I cant go by your normal custom. Just as different words have different meaning state to state or city to city in Nigeria so do they here in the USA. Cant you just acknowledge that akata is not derogatory in your part of the world but maybe in mine.

Husband says i am more Nigerian than women born and raised there.

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You guys are having unnecessary issues here. Sistawoman and KB1 and the other lady have just succeded in cutting of this thread from what it was originaly Have You Dated A Black American

Akata is not derogatory at all.

Oyibo is not derogatory at all.

Sista woman it is probable your husband didnt like being reminded he married out of his comfort zone whenever you are refered as Akata!

It refers to black Americans and even Nigerians who live in America are even refered to Akata.

If you refer to someone in Lagos as an Akata babe, it is even a recognition and respect.

Get back to the topic.

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oyee-bo is an offensive term. I hate it when people call me it. from what i have been told it is yoruba for skinnless of weak. how is that not offensive?

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sistawoman it sounds as if it is your husband that has a problem with the word, not you. Perhaps he detests being reminded that he married outside of his culture and is overly sensitive to any overt reminders of that from people within his culture. To be less cynical about it, I would say that he has accepted you whole into his culture and trying to convince others that you are no longer only whatever you were before marrying him but that you are now a Nigerian woman through and through. Assuming that you are American or British and your are black, I can tell you that some Nigerians will view you marriage as akin to an interracial union: Rightly or wrongly when it comes to most relationships with foreigners, nationality is first and foremost rather than race.

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Its not derogatory but it depends on the basis it was used

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I am not Nigerian

I just sleep next, and exchange bodily fluids with one on daily basis.

They use the term in a derogatory way, if not then my husband would not make it a point to say dont call your self Akata because you are not one. And he would not have made it a point to put that Nigerian woman at the party last year in her place and tell her to never refer to me as Akata again.

Just my two cents.

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Very intelligent observation and comment. I'm proud of you man. Well, the problem I have also is that many Nigerians who are American citizens seem to think with the Blue Passport, they hold the citizenship of the Holy Heavens and vehemently deny their origin.

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I just have to put my 2 cents in this. Akata means black foreigner, it is in no way synonymous with Nigger, It never has and it never will be. The word has no negative connotation unless you wish to self-identify with Yorubas without speaking the language. DuDu means black, not all black persons are dudu, Dudu means that your skin is jet black, not brown, but actually black. Dudu is equivalent to Pale. Let me ask you people this, do you get offended when Hispanics call you Gringos, the Japanese Gaijin? If No then why the big deal with Akata? The word is devoid of hatred and if you think an African used it to put you down then it is all in your own fetid imagination. If you want to stop being called an Akata learn Yoruba and self-identify as one, if not then please stop making the word into something that is offensive. Technically Akata can and has referred to Oyinbos (whites) too. My sisters have been called Akata by other Nigerians  and I am not offended by that. I find it funny that this misunderstood outrage is being drummed up by people who don't even know the true meaning of the word but think that they know what it means. Did a black african ever call your ancestors Akata while lynching them? denying them their rights as citizens of occidental countries, and have they used the term akata to deny you a job, an apartment, or a loan? No. so please stop trying to drum up a fake conflict where nonexists. One more thing it does not mean cotton picker, Nigeria doesn't have a history of cotton industry.

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Well your comment seemed rather blanketed. I was just attempting to obtain clarification. You said that you didn't want to deal with the momma drama, as if all AA men are a bunch of Baby daddies separated from their kids mothers. I was just trying to obtain clarification on what exactly your meaning behind that statement of yours was.

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So are you insinuating that ALL Black-American men have kids?

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never dated an Akata manbut have some as good friends. dont want that whole baby mama drama!

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do not put words into my mouth!

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One striking difference between African and African-American woman is the perception or lack thereof that the dynamite placed deep between their thighs gives them unparallel position in the relationship. The African women, being in possession of the sheath, think that the world of the relationship must revolve around them. However, some men have decided to shun them because the men are in possession of the sword too.

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No we know it because we are AA's, Ignoramus.

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And you come know this pass the men because you don date women abi??

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most black american women i know are not like that. maybe its something wrong with you two (richyblack and khai khai).

alot of men complain about they can get this or that. its not the women its them.

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Summary. Date akata girls, drama shall be yours.

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Yes, and it's been a mixed bag. Simple rules:

1. If she smokes pot, it won't last more than three months.

2. If she has a college degree and no kids, then she's likely to have mental problems.

3. College degree with kids(s), some baby daddy drama.

4. Advanced degree with no kids; they tend to be arrogant and angry.

5. From broken home, college degree and smokes pot; usually very good in bed, but won't last more than 2 months.

6. Broken home, smokes pot, no college degree, has kids - just forget it; she's yours only in the few minutes/hours she's with you.

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nope

it means liberian-shorty

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A word that some Nigerians use to describe Black Americans.

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Akata was never a derogatory term. Anything can become derogatory if people decide to develop chips on their shoulders.

When I was a kid, I had cousins who were Akatas and no one ever considered it derogatory. Even elders were labelled as such and it was never anything derogatory. It is the uninformed of the present generation who read silly meanings to things they dont understand.

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@sistawoman

It is funny you seemed out of shape because of the usage of the word, Akata. I should remind you that it is equally offensive and crassly ignorance to refer to the inhabitants of Africa as BLACK.

Is it not ironical that you have being consistently a culprit in using the word, back, to reference anybody relating to Africa?  Last time I checked though, Africa is not synonymous with black.

By the way, you have a link to Wiki where Akata is referred as a FOX. As for dodo, it is a fried ripe plantain.

Please be reminded that Nigerians or Africans leaving in Maryland are not silly. However, I am of the view that in the process of passing a knowledge, the person that failed to grasp the facts are relegated to stupidity column.

You are free to check your column with regard to this discourse.

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None around to date only black Nigerian faces!

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I've dated them. Some were good and I only had 1 horrible experience with 1 but we are still friends.

Nigerian / African girls are just as trifling as they are.

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LOL! Someone told me that. So I'm only saying what I was told.

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akata means wild (undomesticated) cat - how the heck would Yoruba people invent a word for describing bonobos when they aren't even indigenous to Nigeria?

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A-town,

Please come back to b-more and pass out the memo again because a few here did not get it.

It makes me no never mind. The husbands run the wives and dont allow them to call me Akata. I never put a negative condensation to the word until an African (16 year old) told me it was derogatory.

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You keep getting it wrong. I repeat and repeat and repeat. AKATA IS NOT DEROGATORY. Maybe the folks you roll with use it dat way. I have at least 100 friends in Baltimore and i have never gotten such vibes from them.

Whether you like it or not. There is a difference between an African American and an African (In terms of geographical origin). The fact that African American's are even referred to as AA's and not just plain Americans butresses this point.

Every tribe has its own way of describing people. Until you can tell me the definition of African American in any Nigerian language, AKATA is not derogatory.

DUDU is a yoruba word that means Black. It is just color. Same as white means "funfun". Its like saying Oyinbo for whites is derogatory since they should be called "funfun".

Akata is common in America because it originated in America and means "African American". Thats y they don't use it for blacks in other countries such as Brazil because it would be meaningless. Maybe now, it has started spreading out of the shores of the states sha.

Your decision to "act" if someone calls you an akata is ill conceived. The best thing to do is to look the other way and be the bigger person. (that is if the person implies it in a derogatory mannner)

I've been called Mandingo several times and i really didn't give a F!UCK. Fact is, the people who called me this don't make make my biweekly paycheck in one yr so i care less.

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How do you do it? And did you finally quit the drugs smoking?

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It's all fun being with bright,expose,matured and independent african american ladies,you can't differentiate fun time from work time,always bubbly,bitchy sometimes though but good.

In america you hardly notice antagonism if you have your goings on,not even from kkks,every body seems to be on parallel circles.Show me your friend,i will know who you are.

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please God save us from ourselves

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Replying to the poster, the only difference in dating an AA is the cultural orientation. Cultural differences can be a wonderful experience if neither of you is ignorant and is willing to learn. Bad character people exist in all cultures. The fact that most Nigerians date Nigerians is just a default of humans, being comfortable with their like. It doesn't mean they're better choices. My life with my AA wifey has been most fulfilling. This is coming from a Naija man with very strong African values.

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We all originated somewhere or another in the Gambia

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I'm not necessarily saying its okay to call anyone a slave. I'm just saying thats prolly the origin of the word akata.

I don't know what they call blacks in the UK but i'm pretty sure its not akata. America is where slavery became a serious issue. This kind of reassures me that akata originated due to slavery.

Even if it is derogatory, i can assure you that most Nigerians only use is to differentiate between African Americans and Africans.

If you're looking for derogatory words then words like "elegbon" might be a good one .   .   . which is simply used to refer to "brodas from da hood".

By the way, Nigerians don't call anyone dudu. By dudu, they are only referring to your colour. DUDU means the "Color BLACK" and is not necessarilly used to refer to a person. You can describe a person as being dudu (black) but you don't call them dudu.

As for Akata i don't see it as derogatory

Akata - African American

Kokoye - Mexican

Chinco - Chinese

Oju eku - Vietnamese (okay, i made this one up)

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Is it OK to call someone a name because they dont know what it means?

Every Nigerian I ask has told me that Akata is derogatory and not a good thing to be called.

When I ask them how would they describe me their response is dudu not Akata. So either the Nigerians in Maryland have changed the meaning or they are just silly and have no idea what they are saying.

If it means slaves then is that not the wrong word to describe us now? We are not slaves in the most basic sense but we are slaves to things like money, power, getting ahead, etc. But if this the case for Black American are not Nigerians that come to this country and work hard like us also slaves to these things, so does that mean I can call Nigerians Akata too and they wont be offended?

Just as a point of clarity, what do Nigerians call black people in the UK, Brazil, etc?

Oh and yea if you date a 'ghetto chick' you get what you get. If you upgrade and date a female with some home training you will realize they are really really good girls.

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Most African Americans don't even know the meaning of Akata so i don't really think it hurts as much.

By the way, Akata does not necessarilly mean Nigger. Slaves would be a better definition.

Unless you have a translation for African American in any Nigerian language, you are wrong.

Here's my own line of how the word came up.

Literary meaning for Akata in Yoruba is "Someone who picks peppers/tomatoes"

I believe the early African immigrants simply used the words to refer to Slaves since they "picked" crops on the farm. Being a slave is not derogatory. Its the truth. African Americans became "African Americans" due to slavery.

That being said, people will always be people regardless of tribe/ethnicity. You have bitches and Assholes in every tribe.

I have dated African American women and oh my God, the ones i've dated have been the most caring, romantic, beauuuuuuuuutifuuuuuuul, sexy, and reliable women i have ever met. I probably will end up marrying an African American.

Most people that have issues tend to date "ghetto" chics and expect them to be sane.

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