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Marriage Squeeze: Is This Only An African American Woman's Problem?

Came across this article on the internet today,

A new term has arisen to describe the social phenomenon of the so-called "marriage squeeze" for African American females.[6] The marriage squeeze refers to the belief that the most eligible and desirable African American men are marrying non-African American women, leaving those African American women who wish to marry African American men with fewer partnering options. According to Newsweek, 43% of black women between the ages of 30-34 have never been married.[7] Explanation of this phenomenon is threefold. In part it may be due to relatively fewer European American men being willing to marry African American women, as a result of the lingering effects of social ostracism to which past white American men, who have historically pursued relationships with African American women, were heavily subjected.[8] - although today one in five white Americans would seriously consider marrying across the color line nonetheless.[8] It may also be the result of a desire among African American women to marry African American men due to lingering concepts such as racial loyalty, black solidarity, and the internalized stereotypical belief that non-African American men would not find them attractive.[8] Lastly, there is a desire among educated women of all races to "marry up", although rising income for women has lessened this factor.[9] Another confounding factor for African American women may be the disproportionate mortality rate between men and women in the black community: there are only approximately 85 males for every 100 females by the time they reach their child-bearing years.

Interracial marriage disparities for certain groups

A similar trend can be seen in the UK . According to the UK 2001 census [12], Black British males were around 50% more likely than black females to marry outside their race, whereas British Chinese women were twice as likely as their male counterparts to marry someone from a different ethnic group. Among British Asians (South Asians, not including Chinese), Pakistani and Bangladeshi males were twice as likely to to have an inter-ethnic marriage than their female counterparts, while Indian and "Other Asian" males were more likely to have an inter-ethnic marriage than their female counterparts by a smaller percentage.

What do yall think about marrying non black people or is this an issue for African American woman?

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19 answers

My sister ameromoge,I love you.

That submission was classical.

There is nothing to add or take away.

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@ziddy this is the first time that in the many threads we have shared. . . that I must disagree with you brotha. . .what spoilt says and experiences is a reality for black women everywhere regardless of the continent,

I think you misunderstand her. . .what she is trying to convey to you and the black men on this thread. . . is that given the black man's history and circumstances we (BLACK women) have waited. . .we have never in drobes turned our backs on black men the way that yall (BLACK men) have done us. . . Not certain about other countries but i do know in the states that educated. . .well-to-do black women out number men. . . they are plentiful, with all the characteristics that davidylan and all other balck men seek, however we lack one quality, characteristic we were not born white.  This is not fiction or fantasy. . . and yes legally you have the right to marry whomever you choose. . .but the bigger picture is this what about our black families. . .how do we instill the traditions/culture into the next generation when they no longer have strong roots to hold on to. . .and typically continue to move further and further away from their blackness. . .

There is no other culture more open and forgiving than ours. . .we accept others despite the hurt they have caused in our past and continue to do in our present. . .no other woman can ever love you in totality like a black woman. . .

She has been where you been. . .side by side with you and even when you left her behind for a so called better life. . . if and when you return she takes you back with open arms. . . ready to raise your children and instill values and morals that surpass any other. . .this not to say that we are better than any other woman but that we are your other half. . . your neck if you will. . .when the world degrades you and call you names as your neck I help you hold your head high and give you the strength it takes to face this cruel discriminatory world another day . . .

I nag you because I care, because I want the best from you. . .because this is what I pledge to give you. . . I wont allow you to slip because the world wont and I will only be doing you a disservice if I don't tell you the truth regardless to how much it hurts. . .

As the mother of civilization. . .do you know how it aches my heart to see you turn your back on me. . .to throw away the beauty and hertiage we created. . .

And if you want freedom of choice I have afforded you that as well. . .I have given an array of colors and textures to choose from (there are black women as fair as Ms. Jolie to as dark as Ms. Whoopi) why must you treat me as if I am not good enough to be your queen. . .

I think I will end here and allow you digest what I am saying and pleading to you. . .

I AM NOT A RACIST BUT CANT YOU SEE. . . YOUR INVOLVEMENT WITH HER IS DESTROYING THE US IN WE. . .

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no hard feelings at all.

I'm a big girl and well able to handle anything.

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good one @ ziddy, at the same time they will calim to 'sees all those potentials in you and would encourage you to go out there and "get it".'

It's as if you cant go out there and be what you want before they come along.

In london i don't see blacks/nigerians going out of their way to marry a white girl, but i notice some people especially jjc with the sole intention of getting a piece like it is on the agenda before coming.

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@ spoilt

listen to urself--

how in the world can anything meaningful come out of a liaison b.t.w somebody like you, and the 'strong black brother' when you've sentenced him to a negative stereotype beforehand, and you will jump at the slightest opportunity to reduce him to the sum of his faults (both real and imaginary).

it has been proved beyond doubt that,10 times out of 10, you get exactly what you expect out of life.

the mindset/ideological-bent that has pre-eminence in a person's mind is invariably manifested, physically, into his life.

as above, so below. that's the first law of the imaginative world.

are you still wondering why you've been searching in vain for that strong black brther?

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@ ziddy,

i also wonder. Why all the overheated response anytime a guy shows the slightest preference for white women? I thought life was all about freedom of expression and choice.

Yes some like white women just like so many girls here pretending to love black brothers wont hesitate to jump off a cliff if a white guy merely smiles at them!

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there's an undercurrent of inferiority complex that links all the sistas' responses on this thread

imagine this?:

a woman is a woman whether she's black, white, red or green. the earlier you ladies realize that the better for you so u can all stop being paranoid about issues that exist only in your imagination. last time i checked peopple were still free to marry whomever they felt comfortable with. no crime in it

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i ve had lots of guy friends dating white women. it always puzzles me that they go way overboard and beyond for these white girls cheerfully without complaining .something they never did or considered worth doing for black women. but then again white girls are princesses and should be treated as such. when you land one she's precious and you better treat her right!

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last i checked we were free to marry who we wanted. Why the obsession with black men who marry non black women? Is it now a federal crime?

And NO these "stereotype" that black men who marry white women end up being slaves to them is completely wrong! It is nothing more than a cheap shot below the belt.

I've dated white before, i wasnt running errands for anyone and we both knew who was firmly in charge of the drivers seat.

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that was annoying and uncalled for. Sorry if you lost your sense of humor. You know absolutely nothing about me so i would appreciate you dont say things you have no clue about.

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david you're still a small boy but when you're serious cast your net in the right places

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While I would not frown at inter racial dating and marriage,I have a problem with a black man who would solely seek out non black women.

It is a sure sign of a sissy,a man not man enough to love a woman similar to his mother and sisters.

Sadly after these men are taken to the cleaners by these white women,a black woman would be left to pick up the pieces.

Look at the NBA players,succesful black professionals in America including Africans running after all these white women or women who are half a chromosome away from being white.

Before I get bashed by these white-women-seeking brothers,I ain't looking.

I have since retired my fishing nets.

There are tons of beautiful,hardworking eligible sisters out there and there's something they can give a black man that a white woman could never give them.

She is the only that would understand you through and through.

She is the only one that would understand when others see you as inferior.

She is the only one that sees all those potentials in you and would encourage you to go out there and "get it".

I have heard many white-women-chasing brothers say white women are easy to deal with,are fun to be with,don't nag and complain like black women.

Well if you brothers go around worshipping and waiting on them hands and foot they'll be nice.

If you expect your black woman to work like jacky but you'll be cooking and vaccuming and babysitting happily with a white women,isn't that double standards?

I'm not bashing black men,I love 'em and think the best of them,but dating white exclusively ain't right,there's something wrong with it.

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whitelexi writes like those Geico cavemen.

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Let me make it simple. . .

It is about black men. . .both African and African -American men marrying non black women. . .leaving black women in a marriage squeeze where they are not getting married for the three reasons identified in the article. . .

My question is. . .is this really a problem for Naija women. . . or just Naija and other Black women abroad i.e. in the States and the UK?

Which leaves me wondering what the fascination is with being with women of other races. . .

@whitelexi please. . .it is not equal rights that did it. . .before we point the finger we must first look at self. . .ask yourself how long would you put up with the typical treatment that men give women before you decide enough is enough and assert yourself, need and desires. . .

Men are not the only humans that have wants and needs and just like when you are not satisfied with something you respond to it either by making a change or letting it be. . . compromise or whatever. . .

Respect is earn not given. . .and even if respect is given once lost it needs to be earned. . .

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Say that again?

I think the poster is refering got articles that states that African-american men are dating non african-american women espceially african african women

I just read the post again, a non african-american man can also be an African right, i think theres a difference between An african and an african-american.doing my head in

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The law of equal rights has made our women sick in the head, they lack Respect and Obligatory Etiquette. . .

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Most people like to stick with what they know and trust

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