Do you like Yoruba jokes? Moreover, some classical Nigerian jokes? Read this article to check out a few of them!
Yoruba jokes are well known in Nigeria. Let us figure out which of them is the best.
Here is the list of a fwe Youruba jokes and modern nigerian jokes found on the internet!
A Yoruba Man and an Igbo man were caught in Saudi Arabia, sharing a smuggled barrel of beer. They were arrested and taken to the Sheikh's palace for questioning and judgement. The Yoruba man lied that the Igbo man smuggled and forced him to drink the beer! Both were initially given a death sentence but, as it was a national holiday, the sheikh decided they should be released after some lashes of the whip. As they were preparing for their punishment, the sheikh said, "It's my first wife's birthday today and she asked me to allow each of you 2 wishes before your whipping, but you cannot wish not to be whipped!" The Yoruba man thought for a second then said: "Please tie two pillows to my back before whipping." In addition, my second wish is that you flog me only 20 strokes of the whip. He was whipped, and luckily, for him, the pillows helped to make the pain of the whip easier. The Igbo man saw this; thought for a second, then said: "Thank you, most royal and merciful highness for the wishes. My first wish is to receive 100 lashes with the strongest..., toughest whip available." "If you so desire," the sheikh replied with a puzzled look on his face..." and your second wish?" Igbo man replies: "Tie the Yoruba man to my back...
The death of a pastor
A Nigerian Priest was dying in a hospital and asked his Doctor to call a Policeman & a Politician. Within minutes, both appeared. He asked them to sit on either side of the bed. The priest held their hands and kept quiet. They were so touched and at the same time felt very important for being summoned by a priest in his dying moment. Out of anxiety, the politician asked, “But why did you call us? “. The priest gathered all his strength and said, “Jesus died between two thieves.. I want to go the same way”.
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I am that I am
A Pastor stopped at a traffic light and three girls: an
apple seller, a bread seller and a yam seller pulled by...
To the Apple Seller...
PASTOR: Give me one quotation in the bible where
apple was mentioned before I buy.
APPLE SELLER: The bible said, 'you are the Apple of my
PASTOR: Good! I will buy N1000
To the Bread Seller...
PASTOR: Give me a bible quotation with bread and I will
BREAD SELLER: Jesus said I am the bread of life.
PASTOR: Nice! Let me buy N1000.
To the Yam Seller...
PASTOR: Give me one quotation with yam in the bible
and I will buy.
YAM SELLER: Jesus said, l yam that I yam...
Yoruba man’s wish
Three Nigerian men based in Lagos, one Hausa (from Kano), another Igbo (from Onitsha) and the third Yoruba (from Isaleko) all go before God who has promised to grant them each one wish.
The Igbo man goes first and says to God, “Heavenly Father, more than anything else I would like you to bless my hometown of Onitsha, Igboland and all of Eastern Nigeria. Please make this whole region self-sufficient, prosperous, and safe for all Igbo people so that we can all return home to our beloved Igboland.” God granted the Igbo man his wish and in that instant the whole of Igboland was made instantly wealthy and all Igbos from all over the world returned to the land from whence they came to enjoy its prosperity.
The Hausa man heard the Igbo man’s wish and desired the same outcome for all Hausa people. Therefore, he says, “Allah, you are the most kind, the most merciful, and I ask that you bless my home town of Kano and all of Northern Nigeria. I ask that you make fertile all the arid land covered by the Sahara to provide natural resources that would help make the whole of Northern Nigeria self-sufficient, prosperous, and safe for all Hausa people.” God granted the Hausa man his wish and in that instant all of Northern Nigeria became prosperous and all Northerners returned home to enjoy this prosperity.
Then God turned to the Yoruba man and said, and asked what his wish was. But the Yoruba man deliberated and said “Almighty God, before I ask for my wish I want to make sure I understand something correctly. Are you telling me that all the Igbo and Hausa people have all left Lagos and returned to their various homelands?” God said “Yes, of course. So what is your wish”. The Yoruba man says, “In that case can I please just have some Guguru and Epa”.
We hope you’ve enjoyed these jokes and you will tell them to your friends.
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