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What Do You Hate About Your Culture?

What aspect of your own culture do you HATE/ABHOR so much and should be abolished in your own opinion?. Do you think there should be a forum where young people advise their elders on cultures that should be abolished because they are of no use in this modern world?

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@osisi

Pls, Igbos don't greet there elders standing up as you described, they usually don't look into there eyes (which i think is funny)

They don't call them by there first name(never). You either call them by their title or their nick name or praise name. Besides,you can call them Nnaa or Nne m (if they are old enough to be your parents).

It is very rude of one to call his elder by name e.g my grandfather's name is Godwin, but we either call him papa or his Praise name, Onye o gazilu (onye ogazilu osi n'ibe ya na awo ara). It was only a member of his age grade (otu ogbo)or his colleagues had the previlege to call him, Godwin.

The beauty is whenever you greet, the way you say it tells the elder if you are happy with him or not but definitely you will show respect though not by prostrating(I do like the way Yorubas prostrate). Women bend slightly when they greet the elderly, while a young man does not stretch his hand to shake an elder (man), he only shakes when the elderly stretches his hand forth. Although, most elderly will not rebuke you for that unless he thinks you did it on purpose. Elderly women generally hugs not minding your sex.

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Africans are supposed ( or is it ordered) to like EVERYTHING about african culture.

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I hate the fact that our politicians waste tax payers money on their mistresses and nobody questions them.

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The fact that kids are not allowed to talk and have their own mind.

The fact that kids are not respected.

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i hate the fact that widows suffers alot cos they lost their husbands and taking away wat belongs to them

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I hate tribal marks, and the spraying of money.

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I think, and according to my forbears, culture and tradition are paramount. I could not hold myself to the pedestal novelty where people’s way of life should be subjected to the fancy of pick and choose. It is a fact that if personal choices are prevailing modalities in any cultural society, there would have been no culture at all. Whether denigration of one's culture and tradition is done in public or private domain, such act amounts to self-pity.

It is rather unfortunate that fundamental and inventive genius among our people have been scarified on the altar of the so-called western civilization by the indigenous elements such as you who thought growth is achieved by thrashing one’s culture.

The allusion of the wife-beating, crack dealing, respecting of female and saying no to drug are rather fan-fare of misplaced priorities than culture. My culture has indoctrinated every living soul and inculcated a measure of discipline among the people of my society that a wife should not precipitate what would attract a beating from the husband, the female among us should conduct themselves in a feminine posture as to draw respect, same goes to male and taking of drugs, except prescribed by a doctor, is not an option to our kids.

I am afraid that your gravitation towards personal preferences within a culture is what gave rise to social decadence.

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Actually, that is the beauty of forums like this. We are saying the same thing, in a round about way, give or take a few differences. You, obviously, would rather it were done at home and not in public, which is where I disagree.

I believe in respecting elders, just not blindly. If an elder doesn't respect themselves, then I don't want my kids to get mixed messages, by having to kneel before said elder. In my opinion, I would seem kinda psycho, to tell my kids to say no to drugs and then have them kneel before a 50yr old crack dealer. Or teach my son to respect females, yet he has to prostrate before the known wife beater in the family. That's all I'm saying, each family usually has their own set of rules and values. You are entitled to yours, I am entitled to mine. I just don't subscribe to hypocrisy. When I speak about culture and values, I'm usually looking at it with our kids and youth in mind.

As far as pointing four fingers at one self, if that's the case, then what's so wrong with some self-examination? Without introspection, which can be very humbling, we don't grow. My ego is not that big or fragile, as to assume there is no room for improvement. You've pretty much stated the same thing, so we agree on that. The difference, again, being, should we do it publicly or privately? I think that's a personal choice.

I appreciate the culture and tradition of my people, I just don't have to agree with, or apply each and every one to my life. Again - a personal choice.

As far as taking a chill pill goes, none needed here. I've always believed there's nothing wrong with a good debate, we can agree to disagree. Those, who use words like[i] irresponsible dullard blinded to irredeemable stupidity[/i], would seem more in need of a chill pill, or at the very least, some honest introspection.

Again, we are all entitled to our opinions, so I respect yours, my brother, I just won't apply them to my life.

Appreciate the debate and have a great weekend!

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What need is of the brain when we can not respect our elders irrespective of the elder’s social strata in the community? Please spare me the crap about being created with brain.

There was a culture that made it possible that you were born by bounding your forebears to live together as man and woman. I hope you would not expect any form of respect from nobody because respect they say begets respects.

I am well off with culture of my people and very impressed that the areas that needed moderations have been addressed and will continue to be tweaked. 

Please be informed that when person is pointing a finger at another person, the pointer is invariably pointing the remaining of the four fingers at him or herself.

You are the living example of the culture and tradition of your people, if you do not appreciate them, I suggest a chill pill.

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People are merely stating what they personally don't like. What's so wrong with that?

Are you suggesting that such discussions should only be held in private?

I was under the impression that we were created with brains, so we could use them. Blindly accepting any culture never leads to any kind of growth. There are positive and negative aspects of all cultures(African or Western) and these will vary depending on whom you ask. The good thing about threads like this, is that it makes us think - I guess that's so not part of Nigerian culture. I beg to differ, many great Nigerians have had questioning minds.

I do agree with you, that some Africans seem to think other cultures are superior to theirs, but I don't think that's what is going on here. It is just a discussion - some people have even learned things about other Nigerian cultures. Isn't that a good thing? It's funny how we tend to only see what we want to see and not what's actually there.

I prefer to take the positive aspects from my culture(and any others I might be exposed to), discard the negative(which is a personal thing), while maintaining my Nigerianness and my individuality.

The only thing is life that doesn't change, is change itself!

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Supu! Gwanu fa ka fa nu

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Anybody who posted in support of castigating his or her culture is an irresponsible dullard blinded to irredeemable stupidity. Among the reasons Africans are disdained all over the universe is the inherent dislike of their fundamental form of behaviors that are even superior to alien cultures they embrace. My people say that a rejected person should not also reject oneself.

Granted that there are aspects of our culture that needed moderations does not embolden us to thrash our culture in public. My people say that any child that called his or her mother ugly invariably called his or her father silly and declared him or herself a dunce. 

Most of the societal decadence that has fallen on us today is as a result of our shift from the dictates of our respective cultures.

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I hate the fact that a lot of BS is accepted blindly, in the name of culture, so I love this thread.

I hate the fact that parents and elders are automatically given respect and almost revered, deserving or not. No child of mine will prostrate or kneel for some ashewo aunty or drunken abusive uncle. What does that teach them?

I hate the fact that parents can't bury their children. I would want the closure that comes with attending the funeral.

I hate the left-handed thing, which has already been touched - makes no sense to me.

I hate the fact that in some Nigerian cultures, women are subservient to men - this can be deadly in today's world of HIV/AIDS.

I hate the fact that a lot of Victorian values, which have very little or nothing to do with Africa, are held on to.

I hate the hypocrisy and denial, so deeply entrenched in our culture.

Not so much culture, but definitely a way of life - I hate the fact that religious fanaticism seems to have replaced intellect and that greed and corruption are damaging the very fabric of our societies.

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The facts that kids are not allowed to talk while adults are talking.

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fattening room although many people dont do it again

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The culture of eatting human flesh rituals/blood money like those ones they show in ejiro movies.

the culture of widow marring their late husband brothers

the culture of money conscious

the culture of widow drinking water from their late husband bathing water.

the culture of osu discrimination.

the culture of high bride price.

more later,

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The culture of drunkeness among Nigerian men.

Survival of the fittest that is engraved in us as Nigerians. We find it difficult to be orderly and queue up for what is due to us.  We struggle to enter bus in Lagos thereby denying  children and women that are obviously weaker than us a chance. We behave like animals sometimes. One good thing they do in PH and owerri.

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My Culture?

Nothing to hate again about it

though just the bragging side,

but that is not an issue at all.

Civilisation is embraced.

Besides, Yoruba is the sweeetest culture!

Maybe we should have a thread on this!

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The yoruba culture values RESPECT the most, but what i hate is that they have so allowed it to get into their heads that they want to take advantage of the situation and take people for granted. I was seriously embarrased by an elderly woman who almost beat me up for no just cause just because she felt she deserved so much respect that what i gave her was not enough!

I hate the overzealous approach of the yoruba culture to respect!

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Ohh the trabilist comfort has hit again. This time he or she shows she doesn't anything about Nigeria

comfort, FGM in Nigeria is practiced in the North and alittle in the south.

Read up on your country. Also, any fool will tell you that igbo's are against FGM.

Well now, you showed me a reason to show you know nothing. Anyway, Good luck with hating igbo people.

LMFAO on igbos are the ones doing FGM.

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What states in Nigeria is FGM still practised?

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1. culture of forceful marriage of widows to surviving brother of late husband, whether brother is capable to carry the load of the late brother., and whether the widow wants it or not.

2. culture of female genital mutilation.

3. culture of depriving the widow and her children of their late breadwinners belongings, in the name of safeguarding posterity.

Generally education, legislation and enlightenment can take care of all this. But i love the aspect of my culture that reflects the day to day communal life. But what i love most is the waterworld, from Arogbo to Sabgama, from Burutu to Bonny Island, the waterworld never cease to fascinate me. I look forward to it everytime i visit my homeland. The beauty of our culture far outweighs the grey areas, i strongly believe that educaion and legislation can take care of such.

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Pardoned as in, the adults and elders do not mind him/her using his/her left hand, if [s]he is left-handed.

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What i hate so much about my culture is this issue of male child being of more value than the female in terms of inheritance.

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Maybe it's just me, but a lot of these "cultures" mentioned here don't really seem like cultures, as much as they seem like individual people's behaviors.

Is there anything wrong with the "right-handedness" culture? Also, where I'm from, a child who is acknowledged as left-handed is pardoned (I'm not sure how true this holds for other groups though). Even if I think hard, I cannot really come up with anything about my culture that I hate. . . maybe I'm not familiar enough with my culture as I thought.

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Respect is greeting your elders

Treating ppl kindly

Minding your parents and taking care of them when they grow old

What does giving something with your right hand instead of left do to show respect?

What if your child has no right hand what will you do?, teach them how to give things to you with their feet?

The point is giving something with your left hand IS just the same as giving it with your right

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I dont care about the psychology or whatever, my kid aint handing me stuff with that left hand. It might have no scientific meaning, but is sure is discipline in some form. It teaches respect at least.

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Well i think its foolish because God created every human being with two hands for a reason, my parents dont make me do it unless there are elders in the room which is rare.

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I thought it's only igbos that do that but modern parents don't force the right hands on their kids anymore because of education and christianity the way they used to do it before. it's always the older generation that laid much emphasis on it. Which kin rubbish be that?. Even the leftists are more expensive in soccer career because they are rare and difficult to come by.

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Im 18, Nigerian but ive lived in America all my life

I hate that using my left hand for some things is forbidden

i dont know if its a family thing, Igbo thing, Nigerian thing etc but i hate that if anything about my culture

can someone explain what is bad about the left hand

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My sentiments exactly too. There is this woman that is like 15years older than me around my area (we actually go to the same church).

Her first child has finished secondary school and is hoping to gain admission into the university. She respescts me so much she tells me

enle ma, epele ma, ese ma, odabo ma, anything ma. It gives me the creeps cos I know it's all sycophancy. I pointed this out to a friend

and the person said I shouldn't try to mention it to her that she is just respecting me (for what?) I should show her respect (which I do)

because she is older but not even with the ma, ma every darn statement I make. I hope to tell her to address me just like her junior one.

Honestly, I don't dig this yeye patronising at all. And like otele has mentioned, it goes beyond the neighbourhood greetings into politics,

church and it's just not positive.

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I hate the HYPOCRISY in Nigerian culture. We pretend to be what we aren't all in the name of culture.

I hate the calling of a senior one broda and aunty. Respect is mostly in action not in words. Most of our so-called culture has

kept us in the dark age when other nations of the world are moving on to heights unimaginable.

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emotional child neglect, child abuse, lack of communication skills

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what i hate most in nigeria culture is a situation where poor people ''worship'' the rich. sycophancy. this is brought into politics and terribly weakens our so called democracy. hence, anybody who looses election tries to enter the good books of the winner instead of forming a credible opposition

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I hate the Nigerian culture that most time believes that elder brothers must always do well than their younger ones, even when the younger sibling is talented and able to do well on his own. I also don't like the issue where it is believed that the elder sister must marry first before the younger sister. We need to change our mentality in Nigeria. Cheers.

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Because a lot of people are busy pretending it no longer exists!

I just really hate how boys are preferred by some ethnicities. I also hate the 'manage it like that' thing. I detest that, if I pay my money for something, I expect to receive my money's worth but in Nigeria that seems to be too much to expect.

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Nobody has mentioned "OSU" here.

Does it mean that the Ibos in Nairaland like this Osu thing.

It's still practiced in my area and I hate it

All human beings are equal

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@post

Not just my culture by naija culture in general:

*Parents raising and treating boys and girls differently because of gender

*The idea that if you don't have male children your entire ancestral line is doomed

*The nonsense rites they put widows through; some cultures are horrific here.

*The idea that a husband's family owns their son's property,including his wife and kids.If they don't turn them out of the man's house after his death, they may demand 'their children' from the widow before she may remarry.

*Taking stuff from the man's family before a lady can marry him, in essence,trade by barter.Like the girl is just being taken care of until her husband comes to take his property and settle them for all their trouble.      

*The way the 'elders' script societal roles and expect everyone to follow like dumb cows.

I love my culture's culture of respect for elders, good manners and a good character and name above all else. Other stuff too.

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@ post.

Some wives have to shaves their heads and stay indoors for several days when they becomes widows. Shame!

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lol.

easy though. 'half' the list and give one half to her. Abeg, dont go and run into debt cos you want to follow some silly culture o. Improvise. Most couples put their old clothes into those boxes anyway!!

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@ poster. i hate the fact that right now in a matter of weeks my fiance has to be giving a LONG LIST that i have no idea where thats coming from, its driving me crazy,

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I hate that one has to buy a long 'List' of irrelevant things before you can marry

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I also hate the culture of a confirmed barren woman is allow to marry a lady and keep her at home to have babies for her.

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@ topic,

I hate the culture of northerners are born to rule!!!

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I hate the fact that i have to prostrate to greet,

it can be hell if u have to do that on the road.

and i hate it when ppl bend their empty head to greet me.

They dont even do that to God who created them

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IGNORANCE, IGNORANCE, IGNORANCE. That is what I hate most about every Nigerian culture.

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People shld desist from saying what they dont know.

There is no igbo culture that says a woman whose husband is dead should be married to the husband's brother.

Except u dont know what culture is. Even in the olden days that some pple did it, they did it by choice not that the culture forced her to do so.

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