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Why Aren't Women Allowed To Build Houses Or Own Property?

in many parts of nigeria, its forbidden for a woman to buy /own land or to buy or build a house. often times if she wants to build or buy she has to do it in her brother's name or husband's name! which means the certificate of occupancy is in someone else's name. that is risky oh! besides you arent allowed to tell anyone that you built the house and not your husband. which kind mumu culture be dis abeg?

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In benin, many women ar property owners against this dreaded tradition. In yr 2008 my mum opted 2 own a house of her own. She didn't tell my dad untill after buying d plot of land.

She called me and said she had a suprise 4me. When i returned, she showed the documents and i was upset and traveled back 2my base. My dad felt bad and it took God's intervention 2 restore peace in the family.

Wen i later interogated her she said she did it for my sake as her only son since i av a step broda older than i am. Up till now i delibrately refused to visit its location.

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i wonder , because i bought a land for daddy , he died without signing the papers of the land .i wanted to sign it but they told me No that i am a married woman, but i was the one that bought this land . then my brother later signed it . is too bad . tradition .

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@lawenjins

I hope you are kidding. I know you are kidding.

Dear men I need to let you know that you need to treat women well. or at least look at her not as useless. because your mothers were women. but if you dont respect your mother and so think you will not respect your wife remember there is fate. you will reap what you sow. you will grow old. or you will die one day by her hands or another womans hands. if you think  I am being superstitious then wait for it. trust me, it will wait for you in the future. and you will remember it. I am sounding a warning to all men, because a wave is coming to punish you all for your evil towards women. it will be devastating. so remember you read it here. or remember you read it at all.

and poster, you perceive wrong. women own stuff even in naija ( though not sure about those arabs in the north)

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@laudate and ndipe

I said in some parts of Nigeria, not my own area. ok?

I never tried to justify stripping the widow of her late husbands possessions; i was only giving insight on why it's being done.

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i am hearing this for the first time and i am sure that all the state guys in da house could bear witness that they have many ladies that buy lands and build houses on their own names, so pls, educate me, what part of nigeria is this happening.

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I wonder@laudette, the guy is just contradicting himself. Maybe in his views, a widow's entitlement to her husband's estate should be dictated by the length of their married life together.

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Ehm. . . .isn't this contradictory? On one hand, you claim that no one can strip widows of their dead husband's properties without facing the wrath of your village. Yet, on the other hand you seem to justify a dead man's extended family coming to take over his possessions, simply because his widow was not married to him for a long period of time, or simply because their marriage did not last that long. Which one do you want us to believe?

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Most of you are misguiding the public about what is obtainable in Naija. Nigeria has about 250 tribes with much differences in culture.

In the south east, majority of the women there have their own cars and houses to their name (most times strongly encouraged by their husbands) if they can afford them.

My mum is a typical example. She was even given a chieftancy titlle alongside my dad (though my dad refused to take his own but encouraged my mum to go ahead if she really wanted it). The 2nd car she rode was bought by her.

Most of my aunties own their own houses and cars.

So i really would be glad if spoilt will let us know which part of the country she was refused the right to buy or build a house.

@scrapping of hair

It's not mandatory in my place even though most women prefer to have their hair low on their own will.

As regards to stripping widows of their husband's possessions. One can only try doing it if you want to face the wrath of of my village. I am from Ebonyi state to be precise.

I will not hide the fact that it's still being carried out in some parts of Nigeria.

This as a result of somebody toiling all his life to feed and send his brother to school and after that, he sells almost all he has got to make his stand in world and all of a sudden death came calling and a woman of barely 2 years of marriage will want to take over the whole property.

The truth of the matter is that, unlike in the western world where almost everybody can go to school and survive with little or no assistace from his folks, nobody can couragouslly want to contest ownership of his property if he's gone. In Nigeria, you are totally dependant on your family untill you become responsible and they inturn feel you should pay back when its your turn.

Just how i see it.

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says who.? my mums as 3 houses and my papa get 5 , who send, i know say african men cant tolerate their wife having more than them

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Erm, can we get back to the topic?

In the South-western part of Nigeria, women can build or buy properties in their own name if they have the financial muscle to do so. It is not seen as a big deal. Women take chieftancy titles, or should I say, are conferred with chieftancy titles & recognition, as important people in their own right.

But if a woman is married to an archaic man with a fragile ego who does not own much, by way of material assets or landed property, he might feel threatened by his wife's ability to buy property, or build a house in her own name. This could cause petty quarrels & may even lead to the dissolution of the union. In order to maintain the peace, some women choose to keep quiet about their physical assets, (like land & houses), so that their husbands would not feel jealous.

Women can also inherit property through their fathers, or parents. Among the Yoruba people, two forms of inheritance prevail , in customary law.

They are the idi-igi concept & the "ori o jori" concept (hope I spelt that right!). In the idi-igi concept, a deceased man's property is shared according to the number of wives he has. The children of each wife, then divide the property and/or assets, among themselves. In the ori o jori concept, the property, assets & cash a man leaves behind, are shared equally among the entire number of children he has. It doesn't matter how many they are, or how old  each one of them claims to be, each child gets an equal amount.

In Edo culture however, the 1st son gets everything the man owns, irrespective of how many kids he left behind. If he chooses to be magnanimous, he might decide to share some of those properties with his siblings. If he is a greedy sod, he could decide to take everything.

My advice? if you are a woman, build or buy your own property. You could do so in another part of the country, if you don't want to do so in your own village.

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Nigeria has no laws.

Pay the police and they are on your side.

That is the sad reality.

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You do not go to the police with your will , you go to your lawyer.

A man that lives his wife to her faith is very selfish.

He should at least put his children's name in the will .

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@ Seun

how many Nigerian men bother to write a will? Is this will enforceable in the court of law in the face of tradition?

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Wife gets the property, because she was by hubby's side, either physically, or emotionally, or both. I can see our African side handing out the property to the first son, because they dont want another man (an outsider) to inherit their brother's sweat, if the woman decides to marry. No wonder why our tradition always ask the woman to choose one of her deceased's husband's brother to marry.

Interesting!!!

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When the man dies accidentally and isn't there to decide?. . .Ofcourse the man ALWAYS decides if he's alive.

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I did not know people still shave their hair.

if i really loved my husband , the state of my head will not bother me.

But i will never come on the idea of doing it.

What is still worse is the women that are forced to drink the water the dead husband was bathed in.

Well back to the houses if the man left a testament even women can inherited houses.

But not the Traditional once that are passed from first son to first son over the generations

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@DONZMAN

U never cease to amaze me!

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Certain cultures have different rites when it comes to mourning,widowhood rights and the like.Majority are antediluvian and archaic!However posturing and pontificating on the www would not help matters,neither would name calling!I'm afraid it might take a while for these undesirable practices to disappear

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Does the same treatment apply to men also, I mean, the culture of shaving one's head in the event of one's spouse's death. If not, that is another double standard practice.

My misgivings with such customs is that it dictates how a woman should mourn for the husband. It shouldnt be that way. One should be at liberty to grieve in whatever manner that they choose to do so.

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@donzman

much ado about hair shaving! even after a hundred year marriage it still isnt warranted and will not help anything. cladding yourself in black mourning gear(which shd also be optional) is enough.

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shaving one's hair is not the only way to mourn for the demise of one's spouse. There are other ways.

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By the time you've been married for 40+ years (if you make it that far), shaving your head in the event of your husband's death won't seem like a big deal anymore. You think a 40 year marriage is like your boyfriend - girlfriend or occasional 3 year courtship!

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Up with tradition that breeds divorce rates of 50%.

@Spoilt

My grandpa died in '04 and my grandma shaved her head. Her self esteem is not any lower than it was prior to his death just because she had to shave her hair.

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Down with archaic tradition that diminishes our persona and shackles our mindset.

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@donzman

are you married? if you are , does your wife know your beliefs?? because when the time finally comes that you close your eyes in death , the poor woman !!!!!!! the poor woman wont know what hit her!!!! 'CULTURE"  will happen to her and it wont be pretty!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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I can as well say I do not want a wedding, I could invest the money spent on something else. Right? But it is something that is culturally expected to signify marriage and at such, I have to do it.

Just like a funeral, some people will save a lot of money just throwing a dead relative into a grave and calling it a day!

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@donzman

its just hair ke? maybe for men since they are bald most of the time but for most women, they probably have never been bald aside from when they first came into this world! and they dont even let you go to the barber. they shave you themselves slowly and publiclywith a blunt razor! as if you killed him. a woman's hair is her covering. i believe it shd never be messed with.

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Have your ever heard of BULLYING?. . .If there is nobody to defend the woman or even man for that matter, opportunists will always come along to take what they feel they can. Heck look away from Nigeria, look what is happening in the James Brown or Anna Nicole Smith case. Opportunists will come and take away whatever they can. It's upto the woman's children to come and defend their mother's rights, if they do not do that, opportunists will take over.

How do you know this?. . .Men shave their head and do whatever they have to do. It's hair for chrissake, what's the big deal?

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My dear donzie, when you remove your head from the clouds of london, Canada (wherever that is!) and realise that there are some customs in your fatherland that not even you can change then you can begin to argue.

When i was your age (i presume you are 12 with the way you debate!), i was arguing with my mother why granny had to have her head shaved, sit on ashes and could not go with us to the funeral. . .

Now that i'm older, i know better.

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@donzman

and yeah guys shave their heads sometimes but those that dont want to are not tackled to the floor, held in a choke hold and shaved bald.they are left alone!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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@donzman

the point is that she should not have to need anybody's defence before she can keep property that belongs to her! WTF!

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So saying a woman should shave her head when her husband dies in lunacy? OR is saying that Dvidylan's uncles/aunts should have defended his grandma lunacy?. . .Why did your parents stand by why your grandma was treated that way?

I won't even sit here and anyone will treat my grandma like that, are you kidding me?. . .Since when did your balls get that big?

@spoilt

Men shave their head too, it's only not mentioned because men wear shaved heads already AND Men often die earlier than women.

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@donzman

last time i checked, shaving off a woman's head will not resurrect her husband from the dead! how come men dont go through all these so called rites?

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Did you mention anything about farmland in your prior post?. . .Ode!

Point still remains, I see nothing wrong with a woman shaving her head. Infact where I come from, all family members are supposed to shave their heads. Shaving your head isn't that difficult, I don't see anything denigrating about it.

You talk of your grandma, was she childless?. . .What were her children doing while they were stripping their mom of their belongings? Weak!

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You arent making sense Donzie.

If anything he was talking about the fact that she was stripped of her husband's properties, more so the whole mourning and since when was not going to the funeral and NOT crying a healthy way to mourn a loss?

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Since when did mourning imply women domination?. . .I suppose your husband dying, you apply make-up and start looking jolly the next day, that should imply women liberation. RUBBISH. . .There is nothing wrong in a woman mourning her husband.

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@Topic

Perhaps amongst the women in purdah ~they are properties of their husbands and since they are kept indoors are not allowed to work!Amongst my tribe,Ijebus women have been owning properties for millenia.It's actually an anathema for a woman not to be industrious and have her own stuff.My great grand ma,grand ma and mum all ran their shows without any male interference~and also without asking for!

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Dude, shut up. You were saying otherwise before.

and what's with the dumb "oh which part of Nigeria" questions? Point is it's IN NIGERIA, what part doesnt matter. Infact the OP phrased her question wrong as it's not that woman arent allowed to put money down for land or property just that some people tend to have a problem with her doing so, in other words questioning the act with the excuse that it should be a man's deal and all property should be under the husband or males in the family. I mean some mentioned the whole some wives have to "buy the house behind his back", why would she need to do that?

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thanks for all you comments i agree with you that they deserve the right to own moveable and landed property.

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@lawanjins

ar u 4 real?

all my aunties av thier own properties.I dont see why a woman can't hav her own property.My granny had her own property wen she was alive.Men that hav probs wit dis either hav wives dat ar not matured enough to handle avin properties n ar disrespectful or d men themselves av majr probs wit thier egos

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@thiefofhearts

abi! at least nollywood has helped one person! Lol. they arent entirely useless.

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Ever try telling a Benin woman not to own properties?

She will bite off your De Koko if that is what makes you a man.

All these arrant non sense been perpetuated by silly entities

should stop. The problem we have in this our great Nation is that the Police are

rubbish people who ought to be arresting those criminals who want

defraud woman of their property and lie in the name of culture. Culture my Foot.

I think culture is for people and not otherwise.

And if that slowpoke ever open his trap and say anthing about a woman not owning

a property I will send internet missile to Bomb Blast him

I have spoken

still me

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@mamaput, land ownership for women is a very controversial issue. As you may realize, we live in a paternalistic society, that bequeaths inheritance to the surviving male child, because of the belief that women would inherit their husband's property. In addition to this, some husbands sometimes feel that their position as the head of the household is threatened, and would veto their wife's decision to buy a land. So, women go behind their husband's back to buy land. Sometimes (and I have read it in the papers), such transactions are conducted secretly, for fear of a backlash from hubby and unscrupulous landowners, noticing the desperation of their buyers could swindle them.

For all men on this board, how would you feel if the house that you are living in, was financed100 % by your wife? Would you feel threatened, or would you not care?

Remember, talk is cheap!!!

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@ Toh the first poster was talking about the woman her self buying and building in her name.

Not of the inheritance.

I have never heard of any place in Nigeria were a woman is not allowed to buy or build in her name.

In fact i have even heard of women that built their houses without the knowledge of the husband

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no one is stopping women from building houses, take into consideration economic status of the class of women in nigeria. its pretty much economics. though majority of nigerian women may not be able to have, buy or build there own house. there are many that have theirs

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In Naija things are not always so straight forward. You may want to let some property go rather than have someone visit you in the middle of the night wielding a pretty sharp machete. No good can come of that.

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my mom's name is on the property just in case of fxck ups

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