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Can a Father Marry His Deceased Son's Widow?

roomies, it happened in Ife (Osun State, Nigeria) and we heard & watch it some 3 weeks ago, on Galaxy TV via a popular TV show tagged Nkan Nbe being anchored weekly by Kola Olawuyi.

I was perplexed when the father (100 yrs old) affirmed his relationship (3 kids now) with the late son's widow (2 kid before his death).

Could it be that the father was instrumental to his son's death or could it be he has been digging the woman before the son's death.

Is there anything wrong in what he has done.

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48 answers

@ Poster,

Unnecessary question. Don't u know what is right?

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That is a silly father and nonsense.

The father probably has always liked the babe and could even be the one that killed the son

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so this madness is still going on?

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How do we know that the guy was not banging his dead son's wife before his son died?

Because the title of this thread is: Can a Father Marry His Deceased Son's Widow?

The OP did not ask if a father who has been banging the wife of his son can marry her after the son dies.

But anyway, it does not matter. Having sex with someone (married or not) does not preclude you from marrying them when they become available. If that is the crux of your argument, I suggest you come up with another one.

I'll be waiting!

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it may not be any of the above.

but my dear it is wrong, to me it is an abormination.

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its wrong ooooo, no coma just full stop.

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Ok peeps, this is some topic believe me, this does sound kind of weird and immoral to an extent though but come to think of it and be a little unbiased on your judgements, the question to ask yourself are those raised by allonym whom i support on this issue and also has anyone asked to know if the woman was forced into this of hypnotized by the oldie into it cos i dont think so, its obviously a case of 2 matured peeps falling in love and getting married,

By the way if this is wrong how about a case where a brother inherits his late brother's wife as is practised in some parts of our country, how about cases of another tribe in nigeria where husbands are known to entertain friends or visitors with their wives for the night,

So when looking at things like this we really need to keep an open mind cos you can see it as weird and be able to defend it while someone else could see it as no big deal and still be able to give you reasons why,

Thats my take on this peeps

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not sure i understand what you're trying to say:

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Not in a world where everyone's mind Is properly functioning!

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hmmmmmmmmm,dont know?

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What is morally wrong about it? What is the moral foundation or issue which makes this wrong?

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@allonym

No, not that there is a law against it. We are saying it is morally wrong for a father to marry his son's wife whether the son is dead or alive.

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This baba should be properly investigated.How can he sum up the courage to lie with his supposed gand daughter?I think he had already started doing it before the son's death.That old papa is an abomination to human race.

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Well, at the moment, I cannot think of any moral values which I believe in which are not supported by some law or which are contradicted by another law.

So, to answer the question, why do I support his decision:

1) There is no law against it

2) Everyone has a right to marry whom they wish - with the exception of Inbreeding. Now, if you define this as Inbreeding (which many people in another thread would) then I can understand being against the man's decision.

3) Some suggest that the old man killed his son (somehow) to get the wife. Assuming that the son did not die under suspicious circumstances, the it is equally likely that anyone on this forum killed him as well.

4) I don't see anything wrong with an "old" man marrying a "young" woman. Are old men for some reason not allowed to have wives in nigeria anymore? Or is it that old men are rare, and thus him having a wife is a strange thing, let alone him being alive?

5) I cannot think of a single thing (based on the original story) that the old man (or his wife) have done wrong. There is nothing in the bible that suggests I should look down on their actions. So, why should I?

So, for those who disagree with me please answer one or more of the following:

1) What law if any is there against this situation?

2) Is this a case of Inbreeding?

3) If you think the man killed his son to get the woman, what experience do you have that allows you to draw this conclusion based on no evidence to suggest it?

4) Do you think "old" men should not be able to marry "young" women?

5) Is there something in the bible or some other moral code which prohibits their relationship?

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Damsel indeed. @allonym...please give your reasons for saying the man has done anything bad. Is it because there is no modern law that kick against it?

If that is ur rationale for supporting the old fool, then where do you place moral values that is supposed to be entrenched in our day-to-day living irrespective of civil laws

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Allonym , aswell u've not rendered reasons for supporting the old man's actions. So why not do that and lets see if u make sense.

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Ok, then explain what is wrong with what he did. I've been asking that. The best answer that has been given so far has been: Its wrong because my culture says its wrong. And that is not a real answer to a question to a person who needs a response other than because that is the way the world is. I'm above the age of 6. At this point, I need better answers.

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I am particularly sad that some people still believe the old fool has not done anything wrong. That is why we don't have any explanation for the calamities befalling our nation today. Every other things that provide solutions to similar national problems in other countries are constntly being defied in Nigeria because of our sins.

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make we kill them both then......small problem

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there are many things that have been unheard of that have been introduced to nigerian cultures in the past 50 years. Heck, many of those things were unheard of in western culture. That argument is not sufficient.

The argument that Edo culture forbids a man to marry the widow of his son is a different thing. That, I will have to research and if correct as stated, serves as motivation enough to explain the out of hand condemnation of the man, though it does not reveal why anyone feels this is wrong - unless that too is revealed in my research into Edo culture.

Also, this does not explain why the woman faced no such condemnation from anyone.

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Allonym, i come from edo and its unheard of for such an act to occur (at least my culture forbids it). Does anyone have to present any cogent reason for an abominable act? If its wrong , its wrong.

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Yea i agree with u.He's a foolish old man,he deserve to be buried alive.

Ohun ti o da o loruko meji,koda lo nje (wat is bad does not have two names,its always bad.)

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which kine one too be dat? chei!!! wonders ooooo......anyway make i just catch my papa.....i go kill am finish....!!!1

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father marry his daughter inlaw!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! that's punishable by death.

How would the father feel? doesn't he have any consience? It totally wrong.

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@ allonym,

what concerns age and the man's action? Its simply wrong. Can't he cater for her without marrying her? And u mention the fact that cultures permit such a ludicrous act. Sorry to burst your bubble, mine doesn't .

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Bro, it is a bad thing. Period.

The woman is about 40 - 45.

he entire family members have deserted the old man already.

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what is eww or gross about this?

Nobody mentioed how old the woman is. . .she could be 80 to the man's 100.

I suppose you'all find it gross when two people over 80 get married?

Seriously, what is wrong with this situation? A man marries a woman. . happens everyday. The woman is a widow. . happnes a lot. The woman's husband was his son. . . rare. . but I can't see anything wrong with this either. I can't even think of any culture that finds this wrong.

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EWWW that is so gross on so many levels, what the hell was he and the freaking female thinking. eww before i get insultive and use nasty words i will leave this topic alone.

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But some people are saying there is nothing wrong in what the old man has done, even in this forum.

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Na wa o, only God fit judge sha.

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The old baba is 100 now, the TV series had it that the son died 1987. With simple arithmetic, the baba was 82 when the son died. What would an 87 yr old man be able to dig in a young woman?

The baba just manage give himself bad name before his death, simple as ABC.

Nature abhors lacuna, so there is no culture that will allow abnormal things in this jet age. Even, if thos ab things have been there in the past.

I still insist (God, pls don't slap my mouth o) that, the old man was involved in his son's death.

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Very disgusting.The fact dt d son is dead does not give d old man priority over his son's wife.It is really a bad thing and the man is a disgrace to his generation and all yorubas.

Even if blood dey him body,he for go hotel go carry babes,that would have been better.

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Yes! Yes! Yes!

If it is acceptable norm within my culture.

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wat? say dat again will ya? so u telling me u can marry ur sons wife if God forbid he dies!!!

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What are you people fighting about?

The man is dead and the woman is free.

Its the case of '' His place , let another man take''

Abi your quarell is because the oldman is the father of the late husband?

If na you nko?

Will you be looking after food, for another person to eat?

CARRY GO BABA.........NA BLOOD DEY UR BODY JARE.

WHAT A YOUNG MAN CAN DO AN OLDMAN CAN SHOW WITH EXPERIENCE.

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Wat!! Yucky!!Yucky!EWW!!EWWW!! Dat is so wrong!!! wats wrong with da father? and y in d world did da woman agree to sumthing liked dat maybe they used juju on her cuz dats gotta be da only way she gon marry her late husbands father and eevn have sex with him. gosh dats too disgusting to think about!!!

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Nothing wrong ke..please there's everything wrong ...infact very wrong.

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Seun, i want to believe the above piece is from u. How on earth, u deemed the old man was right with what he has done? then we can categorically place the death of his son at his door step.

controversial entry we got from u or could it be a case of impersonation ?

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I see nothing wrong with it

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Shameless indeed. The old papa is now deaf but not dumb. The woman at the center of this matter has to thunder into his ear to get him hear what people say.

I guess the man is already getting his judgement on earth.

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Oh what a shameless father that would be....................

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nini, we've got to see ur live pix and not this flower (rose - am i right?). back to the point, dis man should be probed by ICPC i suppose.

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Well, he may have done so to prevent the woman from being out of his household. Who knows, the woman may be a very nice one whom he did not want to loose after the death of his son.

As for me i can't do it but it happened live in Ife (Osun State). What do you think this old man deserve as reward?

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of course it's wrong there is no need to ask this question

can u do it?

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Eeeeeew! Not morally right, in my book,

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