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Can You Parent Another Person's Child?

I've always pondered over this, whether i can marry a single mother (with just one kid) or not, could be due to divorce, waywardness, widowed, and other factors you know, I'm counting on you fellow NLS,

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58 answers

depends on your personality, imo.

some can, some cant.

overseas, stepfamilies are quite common and part of the culture, but in nigeria, 9 times out of 10, what you get is a voodoo setting with all kinds of witchcraft and bad belle going on.

till they kill each other off, nobody rests.

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Depends really, depends on the age of the child, the relationship they both have with each other, the relationship i have with the child, damn too many variables

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It all depends on the circumstances attached to the whole situation.

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Yessssssssssssssssssssssss

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if i'm left with my will, i will say no cos it's not an easy job to do. one needs the fear of God to do that faithfully

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Why not? it shouldnt matter if the child is yours or an orphan from halfway around the world. anyone who has the audacity to mistreat any child isnt worth having in society

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Thank God they are both offline

kilode sef

na2day??

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jeez get a room!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1

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either if i strike a gold mine or if i am incapable of producing children of my own.

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there is no problem in that but favouritism will always arise in the future

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almost 3 whole pages of the 2 of you hijacking this thread - get a room already.

Back to the original subject - all kids needs love, so there's nothing wrong with parenting someone else's child. Just make sure you are up to the challenge, it's not for everyone, but that child might end up bringing you great joy.

I'll probably end up with 2 or 3 adopted kids.

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you could be in the position of the child you know

think well

i don't think there is any harm in helping a child even if the dad refuse to take responsibility 4 his action

I believe that God will sort him out.

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tue talk

notting is free on earth

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If say, a child comes to live with us from a relative or less priviledged b\ground then yes but if the child will be joining based on that the child is of my wife with another man ; NEVER!!

Simply because though the 2 scenarios look alike, the latter is a completely thankless task:

The bleeping father is somewhere with no burden and im here slaving away raising a child who will be difficult as hell during the teen years and then fc.uk off to find Bio-Dad who will think he has all the rights because he had sloppy sex a while ago.

FC.UK THAT

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two quick questions. . . .

how is the child related to me??

And where are the parents to The child??

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Children need care,love and attention.Cos that child would have been YOU.There is nothing wrong in caring for someone else child.

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Sure it not unheard of

There really is no rigid code of conduct on that

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why not if not. it is the same thing as contributing to charity and one of my purpose on earth is that, so, if i cant do that then deception is my second name

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why not, it is as good as adopting a child,

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Yes, decent and well meaning people all over the world have always done this to help children who happens to find themselves at the mercy of social inequalities.

It's nothing new in civilized world as people this end have always done so and are quick to tell you, how fulfilling and rewarding such act of mercy can be.  It is only in poverty sticken regions of world where people rarely hear let alone see such acts that it can be surprising to learn that, 'YES' it can be done and it's always done by good hearted people without seeking any rewards from or exploiting the under-previllaged child/family.  So, if you doubt your ability to raise someone else's child, I suggest you can if you try as it can be more rewarding than raising your own.  However, if you seek instant rewards or have exploitation in mind in helping a child in need, just forget it. There are people in this world who finds it difficult to help others and if you happens to be one of them, this act of mercy is not for you else, you would definitely end up either exploiting or abusing a child in the name of help/support so, don't get involved, it's only meant for people with hearts.

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Easier said then don. make the thing happen first we go know.

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[why did u thinkn some one can take care of another person child like is own baby,it not easy to do that if it easy why would every body live with their parents.if so let some one take me if sxhe can take me like isown blood.

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yeah

i know some get messed up at the end of the day

what i'm bringing out here is everybody deserve care no matter where u from

i use cole as example because no body knows what she is capable of becoming

imagine if her foster parent did not bring her up like that

maybe her singing talent would have died up

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I'm sorry to say this. . . but this is the worst way of looking at anything in life. Brandishing the name of one (or few) person who seems to have made something of her life out of the several hundreds of thousands whose lives are nothing to write home about smirks of encouraging the wrong attitude.

Its just the same thing you get when one success story is brought out in a bid to prove that growing up in social care is not bad. There are several children who grew up in social care and are now being recycled through the criminal system but social officers always find one that can speak well, dress him/her up for TV and try to make people believe what is not true.

oops, your point (and mine too) actually has nothing to do with the title of the thread.

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keyshia cole was not raise by her parent

but look @ her 2day

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There is nothin wrong in raising anoda person child,if am opportune to do so i will do cos i was also trained by anoda parent en today here am i to glorify God cos bible says love your neighbour as your self en also be your brodas keeper.

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As i speak, i got a step male child in my care and am incharge of his up keep. It great giving the best outa life.

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i am strongly thinking of adopting a male child right now, there is nothing wrong in raising kids that are not urs

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Poster,

Like someone already mentioned, what's the big deal?!

For you information, the present president of the world, Mr Obama was not raised under his fathers care. He has ended up too well, beyond what most children raised by their biological parents will ever achieve.  Spread the love if you have it, it will only make the world a better place.

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am with you on this, its high time we encourage & commend virtuous behavior instead of waywardness

if she had gone for abortion & lost her womb then everybody will call her names & avoid her like a plague

well i'll gladly be with this person if she is the one than be with the so called "fresh ones" who have truck loads of skeleton in their cupboards

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If I was to choose, I will rather have the girl that protected herself or had abortion.

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Countless number of girls abort unwanted babies everyday or protect themselves to avoid pregnancies, this woman kept hers, she should be respected and loved for it

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I wouldn't want any form of baggage at my first time in the altar.

I see it as a beginning of a new life for me and my wife. With a child, it appears more like a beginning of a new direction for her.

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And what difference does it make if it was your first, second, an so on?  I'm just curious to know your justification for that.

@OP, obvously, you're bothered about this and probably in a relationship with someone in that situation and considering marrying her.

well, i'd suggest you not get too involved with the person if fathering another man's child is an issue (which seem to be) for you.  simple!  Peace!

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I wish to be given that opportunity in future- to show love to the motherless.

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theres noffing wrong in marrying single mother cus of their experience they become more wiser not wanting to jeopardize their second marrige

seeing the second chance as last therefore making all effort to make it work.

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Abegi, e go tey before I forgive any wife wey cheat on me o! especially when I have always been loving and faithful.

Even if i forgive, I sure wont forget it lailai and I go take am react. So it's better we go our separate ways.

A wife that will cheat on her husband (when she's been taken good care of in every way) can kill the man. 99% of ladies just dont give it away like that without having feelings for the man . . except for financial or emotional reasons.

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Man your question no dey straight!

You first dey talk say can you father another man's child, now you dey talk of getting married to a mother.

Ok, two answers----Yes and No!

Yes: that is if I wan marry a mother. Yes, I can father the child.

No: If my wife or woman sheet on me. No, That's infidelity.

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guys only

yeah

there is nothing wrong with it

at the end of the day

no body plan to be single

shits happen init

so yeah everychild deserve care

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if the girl is the kind of girl i care for i can do so

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i can and i prolly will if i find one that i can understand and who understands me too.

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None of the reasons u have stated shuld stop you from fathering a child by another man.

A woman that was lose could have changed.

Besides, it is not about the woman but about the child, there are so many kids on the street that will give the world to ave a man to call a father, and sometimes, i think we especially Nigerian men always think about what is in it for me and not the other person.

We sometimes needs to look past the ordinary and do our best.

However, it is not for everybody and if you are convinced that it is not for you, dont force yourself.

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I dont see anything wrong with it personally. my previous girlfriends had a child, it was amazing apart from the break up that occured. YOU WILL LEARN TO LOVE THE CHILD , if you Love the woman involved.

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