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Love Marriage Or Arranged Marriage Which Do You Prefer?

Arranged marriage or love marriage which one do you prefer and which one last longer in your opion? well I am sure love marriage is a big hit for most people, but sometimes we choose partners who are physically attractive to us. Physical attraction creates strong emotions, which we might think is love, but it really is just infatuation. During this passionate stage, we overlook the other person's flaws and habits, because we believe that we are in love, and love is all that matters. Then reality strikes, the infatuation wears off, and we start to see the flaws and we get annoyed by the habits. on the other hand in arranged marriage, you may not like the person at first but as time goes by you begin to create love for the person.

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I have a girl and am planning to get married to her. she was introduced to me by my aunt. I did the rest myself by toasting her and following up the rest myself. The role my aunt played was jst arrange our meeting and i took of the rest all by myself from there. At the moment no one knows the status of our relationship except we both. Our parents 99% of their marriages was arrangy in does day and it worked 99.9999%.

Once a good recommendation is made for u use ur swaga to follow it up before u decide marriage. The decision is urs

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love marraige is the obvious choice because as they say, the devil you know is better than the angel you don't know. marrying somebody you know nothing about is like jumping into an ocean, you don't know what to expect or what is at the bbottom. it's a dangerous risk and some ppl ened up marrying serial killers and such. x

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Whether Love or Arranged, what matters most is that the two should understand themselves and love each other cos it is a life time agreement

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Osisi what you do not know is that even the white man , now do Arranged marriage, But they call it DATING SERVICEs.

Arranged marriage in Africa are Referral service. Even job place have them. Arranged marriage in Africa involve people Refering you to others. People who trust you and believe in you. Not everybody get Arranged marriage. When you find a woman , who could not get married either by love marriage and Arranged marriage in Africa , you know the person must be bad.

People don’t do Arranged marriage for women or men who are bad. It is only the good one that they do for. Even in Yorubaland. The first wife of a man is allowed to look for a wife for his husband and marry her to his husband. Older Yoruba women do it. They look for a younger wife for their husband or sometime when they can not have children, the man first wife goes out to look for a new wife for her husband.

Yar Adua married his children out, just of late.

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tgirl4rael. u're very funny fellow.wat if d guy is a pretender wat will u do after all, well, dats where am actually going 4me i prefer 2luv someone rili b4 goin in2 marriage.if u were cheated at one time,u av 2 tri again anoda time.dat's d'koko.

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Arranged marriage is better and will work on 2 grounds:

1. If thr is compatibility

2. If none of d people concerned is in love with another person.

Love will most def set in later.

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Like this is all girls talk, , But let me barged in as one of the million

beneficiaries of an arranged marriage, , i once had love marriage which lasted for a while, But due the nature my job than, on the course chatting one day with a friend at home ( North ) he recommended a lady to me and today we happily married without any major ups and downs, I strongly support it 4u ladies.

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lol did this dude just say wife hunting trip?

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Any 1 of dem provided let God has a hand on it bt certainly i prefer love marriage

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I d say neither because what i popularly called love will not keep a marriage going. What people should look for is a soulmate, a person who is your best friend. Those are the marriages that last because when you are married to your soulmate, you accept each others flaws and see them, none of that love is blind ish. Real love sees the flaws and is able to work with it very much like a best friend so to me the best marriage is a real love marriage i.e. best friend/soulmate marriage

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Arrangee marriage could be sweet, look at it as blind dates, lots of mystery and hidden links attached.

Just go to the airport, ask her, are you my new wife? And she will nod her head with that charming first smile, and you take her home and try to learn so much about her. Your wont expect much from her and your expectation wont be too tall. Thats why is will work, she will always try to measure up to your needs, to please your parents and make it work.

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Love rocks. Love marriage for ever. It's not easy to do arrange again unless either the person is spineless or the conditions are in the most unusual.

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Good point, which do you prefare?

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like someone rightly said, arranged marriage no 'forced' marriage. also, to each, his own. some people no fit do arrangee. some people no mind. People who have been married for decades will tell you. Love is very important in a marriage;but committment is undoubtedly MOST important. in arrangee marriage, the parties usually enter it committed. the love comes eventually. arrangee and love marriage all get who e de work for.

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Arranged marriage is craziness!Mostly one gets the opposite of what you want.

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I'd like an Intelligently arranged marriage.

Where the guy and the girl are out together and not told anything, but little little isinuations are made to them suggesting they should go after each other.

Telling a guy/girl this is the person I want you to get married to is just plain dictatorship and simply out of vogue.

Even we as youngstars matchmake, but we don't force it, we just suggest it to our friends, cousines, etc.

Abi una no feel me.

But then love come with another game play entirely.

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May God help us all. Marriage is good only when properly done.

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Ok, may be someone has to really explain what is meant by arranged marriage. Are you telling me that you will marry someone you barely know and to whom you are not in love with in hope of developing the love?

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I prefer love marriage but that doesnt mean an arranged marriage cant work.

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osisi abi deepzone or whatever

TO EACH HIS OWN. My friend told me of her co-worker who is anxiously waiting to go back home because her parents have prepared her a husband. One of my indian friends also got married through an arranged marriage. The morale of the story is if you like it then go for it. Its economical and cheap you don't waste time going through the whole dating hassle and if you are the shy guy you don't have to be so racked up with nervousness at asking a girl you like out. The selection process is done by people whom you trust and with a lot of consultation from the individual who is getting married anyway. There marriage is simpler because they already know the code of being a good wife and they rarely venture outside that. They are also not raised to be rebellious as we are.

Also most so called "love" marriages are very imperfect because people are not the same way they are after marriage. Everybody pulls a front during courtship, then a year into the marriage you begin to find out who they actually are? so what is the difference between that and arranged marriage.

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Arranged marriage is dumb.

Marriage is hard in itself with a man you fall in love ,how the fried tilapia do people make it with some bloke off the streets just because some psychotic family members tell you they know what's best for you.

If an adult woman agrees to this type of arrangement,that's her cup of tea,but when they subject under-aged girls to this evil arrangement especially in northern Nigeria is where I say,God help the little girls of the world.

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I have quite a few Indian friends here in the US, and most of them (Hindus, Christians, etc) do the arranged marriage thing. It seems to work for them, but that one can never work for me.

When the time is right, I will go back to Naija on my wife hunting trip, nothing will be arranged by my family.

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iboboy, don't you understand sarcasm?? Geez, what's wrong with you people? didn't you see that i put a wink sign at the end of the sentence? by the way, to reiterate,  TO EACH HIS OWN. If you like arranged marriage then fine go along with it, if you don't its your business.

Becomrich,

May the good lord bless you for that comment. This is what Nigerians need to learn, that western notion of love is not ideal and pragmatic. True love from God is described in 1 corinthians 13 like you just stated. That love is not based on feelings and sentimentality and all that take me to the moon nonsense. Its pragmatic. I don't ever recall Joseph giving mary flowers or buying her expensive dinner with candles and what not but they stayed married. Love in western culture is very perverse that's why 50% of there marriages end in divorce, and that's after all the expensive white weddings, flowers, candle lit dinners, chocolate, teddy bears and honey moons.

If you want to see what a true spouse is, then read Proverbs 31:10-31, that's pragmatic and biblical love not sensual and sentimental love like you see on TV. Its unfortunate that my African people want to start immitating that. What a shame.

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Now one simple question is this,,,what is LOVE within the context of marriage? Do you say U LOVE someone when you are actually take advantage over the other party??My quest is this: Give LOVE(as in what you call Marriage love) to those who deserves and earn it!I can categorically tell you that you re probably in LUST relationship and not LOVE.

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Poor girl. I see you've found it very tough out there. You're now rationalizing. Anyway, anyone  who says love is not important, has never been in love before. For you, i can see that is the case.

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Until you are capable of defining what LOVE is and what arranged marriage is,,then you lack the competence to contribute on this topic.The word LOVE is a relative term! To different people and at different scenerio or situations,,,,certain factors inspires love,,what inspires love for Mr A is different from what inspires love for Mr B.

If an (so called arranged marriage) captures who inspires love to Mr A,, I see no reason why he should not jump at it.In the real sense of things, almost all marriages are arranged from the beginning of the world! The wife or husband you are married is either connected to you via networking.

In the past our grand parents normally pick who guys should get married too,,,and in those days such marriages had solid foundations and lasted even much longer than the ones today.

What most people call LOVE today is nothing but lust,deception,fraud and manipulation! That is why when it comes to marriage, I tell everyone who cares to listen that the first thing to do is to use ur HEAD,,,there is no pity in marriage! A girl or guy should not get married to a girl or a guy because he/she told him/her that he/she LOVES him/her.Marriage is a seriuos business and it amazes me how people just don't take it serious.Every man or woman should have dreams,aspirations and passions, if you can't get someone to fit into such desires then get one you can develop or nurture to that standard.And if its not working out while dating,,,you don't have to deceive urself by lying to the word LOVE,,,People need to understand that no man or any woman is particularly meant for any man or woman.Also there is that need to appreciate the fact that a broken relationship is better than a broken marriage,,

Therefore, I prefer an arranged marriage that would inspire or ignite my LOVE,,,

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you will never know the secretive part of your spouse until you begin to live together.

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what is marriage without love?

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All the people here talking about arranged marriage don't know what they are talking about. You are either too ugly, fat or some other thing to get a man by normal means. arranged marriage means some total stranger jumping up and down on top of you everynight. you think it's easy?

The marriage itself is not the problem, it's the part where you are living together everyday, day in day out.

As for me, if i don't love the babe, i'm not marrying her. I will rather love and marry a babe with a bad family, than marriage some total stranger because she fits the bill.

That is condemning yourself to a life without love and that kinda life is not worth living.

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so this Right Man talk still dey for una system? My take is there is none. Your criteria always come in too much too high.No problem of people looking for what they don't have but does this die down when aging?

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Both types have their pros and cons. Arranged marriage is different from forced marriage. An arranged marriage just means someone else(usually family) found and introduced the person to you, both parties have some input in the whole process, they are allowed to meet and court before getting engaged and I believe either party can say no, but I must concede that it may be difficult to say no if all the people involved keep applying pressure on both parties.

The main pro of arranged marriages is that both sides are so intertwined that it makes it a bit more difficult for either party to misbehave, but like I said earlier individual experiences differ. There were several arranged marriages in the bible and they lasted. It is equally good to marry for love, but I prefer an arranged marriage because you have detailed information about the person, his family, health issues, family history etc.

But forced marriage is a no no for me.

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Arranged marriage is not it at all. So intending arranged couple beware.

Even marriage between two best friends that have known each other is not that easy not to talk more of two strangers.

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When I was younger I had an arranged marriage through the mosque. It didnt work out and I have a child from that marriage. Thankfully, five years ago I married again to someone who I loved and knew well and still do.

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Come bak here dear

Do you say lucky . . . . hmmmm

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No o, people don't confuse nada.

With the situation you described above, its more like a blind date than an arranged marriage. Here, both parties meet, test the waters and see if they are compatible. They don't have to get married if they don't really want to.

With arrangee, you have to marry the person. Prior meeting or not.

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I consider that as "giving a push", not really arranged

and most parents consider what THEY think are suitable requirements, not yours.

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Lol, usually it is the 'rents who will do this and they will be aware of your requirements.

Most people confuse arranged marriage to being forced into marriage and they couldn't be more wrong. It's could be something as simple as organizing an event, have both parties meet (they know why they are there. . . so no pretense or coyness) and you talk.

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sisi, who excatly would you want to arranged this for you?

as in you'd accpet anyone or must they be aware of your "requirements"

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Forward your yeye CV to Seun and leave my sisi in peace jor.

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Arranged marriage. Both families have a mutual understanding what should take place.

Love is not a valid reason to get married to someone. Love fades.

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Moy!!!

nor go marry o

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Hehe!!

Lurvv marriage!

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@ topic

Marriage is Marriage

it doesnt matter

but as for arrange Marriage i do not support that

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Love Marriage for me please!

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would you divorce if you knew your parents will kill/disown you if you left?

Think about that.

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I watched 20/20 last night and they talked about marriage. Only 5% of arranged marriages, at least in India, end in divorces, while 50% of "love marriages" end in divorces.

Just a thing to think about.

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Does anyone mind defining what is meant by Love Marriage?

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I knew it all the girls will say that

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