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Nigerian Men Don't Marry Early Enough?

Naija Guys Wait Too Long To Get Married

This is a common phenomenon found in most naija guys, you will find out that many guys now deem it compulsory to at least own a tokunbo car and have a two bed room flat before they can get married and have kids.

Though i subscribe to this, but i have found out that it will automatically make guys end up being womanisers for far too long or even crash a decade relationship because some girls don't have the patience.

I wish i can have all my three kids before i am 35 and have more time to work and give them good education, so that before i am 60,each of them can fend for him/herself.

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In today’s world in most developed countries people do not rush into married life. They prefer to wait a while and to get financial stability before they settle down, get a wife and kids. That might be one of the reasons why Nigerian men do not hurry to get wed. Another probable cause is the availability of sex outside the marriage. Some ladies think that having premarital sex would make them popular and it does, but not among those, who wish to get married. Men get free sex with no obligations, so why should they rush it and get a ring?

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I still beleive that about 95% of married men (in fresh marriage) still cut corners and about 5% of the newly married ladies also play OFF SIDES.

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Men do nt marry on time because they havent got good JOB

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how can a hustler get married wen all the girls about town wan marry already made man

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That is what yoruba call Olojoro!

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That is wonderful. I am also married. And less than 30 But, I must confess, I 'cut corners'. I don't call it cheating. I just have to find helper when my wife is not in the mood. May God forgive me.

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And you are the doctor that diagnosed that? Hmmm? Does that applies to your brothers also?

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osisi(banana) am I a jamaican? pls tell me.

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not all nigerians marry late. and for those that do they probably have their reasons.i'm a core nigerian, just clocked 27, and plan to get marry in 2 years time.i'm still looking for miss right anyway.

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Especially when there's a mistaken pregnancy along the line,they hardly marries.they tell you they are not okobo's

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My Nigerian husband was born in the U.S. and raised in Lagos from 6 mos. old until age 20.

I married him when he was 21 and I was 19. (He was already a natural born citizen) so citizenship was not the motive. Love was, and he wanted to assure that this Proverbs 31 woman wouldn't be found by anyone else. He begged me to marry him.

Being very connected to the local Nigerian community I can say that Naija men typically are marrying around age 30 or later here in the U.S.

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Cos marriage needs money and how many nigerian men cant afford to take care of themselves, talkless of another woman, and most nigerian family has no idea what it means to enjoy one another be4 kids, they wanna have kids fast fast, most men still lives with papa and mama, how sad our economy is, but i am sure that all will be well soon or at least one day.

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My Nigerian husband was born in the U.S. and raised in Lagos from 6 mos. old until age 20.

I married him when he was 21 and I was 19. (He was already a natural born citizen) so citizenship was not the motive. Love was, and he wanted to assure that this Proverbs 31 woman wouldn't be found by anyone else. He begged me to marry him.

Being very connected to the local Nigerian community I can say that Naija men typically are marrying around age 30 or later here in the U.S.

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o boy suffer dey n noone wants 2 bring kids 2 suffer women only align 2 finished goods man must chart a course before settling down at least they marry someday

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HI,

DONT BLAME THEM COS D ECONOMIC SITUATION IS NOT FAVOURABLE MORE OVER NIGERIAN GIRLS LOVE MEN WITH MONEY EVEN IF HE STOLE IT OR HAVE U NOT OBSERVED THAT D BIG BOYS MARRY VERY SMALL GIRLS?HAVE U NOT SEEN BEAUTIFUL CHIC 4GETTING DY TRUE LOVE 4 STINKLY RICH OLD MEN?

CONFIRM FROM UNILAG ,UNICAL,ETC

BUT MONEY IS NOT D BASIS 4 MARRIAGE(I MEAN SUCESSFUL ONES LIKE OUR PARENTS USED 2 HAVE)

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it's true, nigerian men will be 40+ and still doing bobo

This ain't right!

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we go block on monday

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i know that. you might be surprised i know you personally, soulpatrol. only let me leave you to investigate which of your acquaintances i am

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they spend years and years and yore dey sample (main reason why they don't marry early enough).

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soulpatrol, i empathize with you. but i think i am off the shelf (so it seems), but i hve a cousin and we look very much alike, only he is shy. could link him up. and pls, don't run away with my bros. we'll s'port you.

abeg, make no one diss s'patrol. there is nothing wrong in the woman making the first move. if this practice was accepted in nigeria, maybe this thread wouldn't even arise as more naija guys for don dey hooked now. na shyness dey make some men never propose till date, and they are approaching 40. so all hail soulpatrol!

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ay,chiori i didnt mean alll of them, but i gotta admit their kids are like 5 and the dude will be like 45, hey maybe not u thats good ur startin early =)

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Janeesa, that's a blatant lie. I am getting to 29, and I am set to tie the nuptials. And I am a Nigerian to be certain. So regurtitate on that.

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hell yea nigerian men don't get married early b/c they are like 50 years old and they are still changin diapers and walkin around with baby food on their clothes

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I noticed that too, buh that will not happen in ma lyf, I will get married around 24. I want tu grow up having kids around.

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excuses excuses. guys just want to have their cake and eat it simple. they want to be able to play around all they want even when they're getting old, yet expect there to be decent women left when they're eventually "ready". rubbish!

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no correct babe for jand

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If that is the case how do you explain the excess amount of mid 30 naija guys in Jand who are well off and yet are still doing the player thing?

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nigeria's economy to be BLAMED

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How guys go marry if money never arrive? small time the wife go dey go yansh big man wey get money

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na waoooooooooo ,

i pray you are rich by then, if not you will wait for for more years

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Omo, when u take your kids to school they will tell them "Your grandfather is still strong".

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Na money. outside of nigeria, they get a lot of support from the government so they marry as early as 18

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Nigerian men don't marry early enough because they need to make money the country is very hard these ddays and things are so expensive.

even me, i won't get married until am about 85 to 40 years of age.

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here in the far north marriage is not that difficult as a matter of fact you can have as many wives as possible with as less of twenty thousandyou can marry a lovely Hausa girl with the vast space available one just picks up space in the family house and erect building no stress of taking up an apartment that would cost several thousands our towns are small that you can move around without a car so4 those of you that have intrest in getting married but no show you're very much welcomed

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I dont think girls are ready to subscribe to all these definations of wife materials or what have you. some of these girls dont even care about being good wives or mothers because they all want to have their ways and do thier things the way they want it. This you know is contrary to what most guys expect of thier chiks.

I personally beleive that as long as my wife can satisfy me sexually, we would remain together forever because sex satisfaction is basically the reason why i am getting married.

ONE LOVE

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I quite agree with you on the issue of individual perception of wife material, i would expect my own wife to be a wife wheather i am around or not, every one is aware of what he or she wants from his or her spouse, this is not about men alone but the ladies are more concious of this issue.

If we attach too much seriousness in search of a wife material one may remain unmarried for a very long time, this is because people now have divergent opinon on contemporary issues such as this. Some people no longer believe in marriage, some are homosexuals and it may be funny to hear from these people that GOD has created to be what they are.

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Ok, maybe ishould have said "there is no such thing as a 'standard' wife material", as defined by the International Standards Organisation (hahaha). Sorry, some men think a wife material is a woman who will obey and please her in-laws by all means, is willing to sit at home with the kids, and will never challenge the man on his decisions.

Each man's definition of wife materlia differs

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I think the notion of "wife material" is being taken rather too far here. Each man has some (fair) idea of what he wants in a wife, which becomes the characteristics of his "wife material", and as such is, first and foremost, a subjective thing. It doesn't always have to do with what the man's family and relatives want. What is more, perceiving a woman as being capable of making you happy for as long as you live with her is another way of saying that she's a "wife material" for and to you, cos no man want to marry a woman that would keep him in misery until death do them part. However, the woman you look at as possessing the capacity to make you happy while living with her may be seen by another man as being likely to make life misery for him if he lives with her. Different strokes for different folks. I think, there's a sort of notional "wife material", but which is much dependent on each man's particular perspective, and as such much subjective, and often we cannot do much to change the man's idea of that "wife material". That may be why some (unmarried) men still complain about not meeting any good girl, when there seemingly are lots of them around. It's all about saying and looking at the same thing in different ways.

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@iice: there is no such thing as wife material - except you subscribe to our hypocritical, culture-without-reasoning enslaved nigerian societal rules. If i think you as a woman will make me happy (with my own input considered as well, of course) for the next 50 yrs, then so be it - i can marry you. Every other relative can go and jump into the Lagoon

@Gettolove

You echo most of my thoughts, but i'm afraid i'm a little more rabid than you . . .

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too many women to choose from really, but too many few can make a good wife

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Very few good women to choose from.

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Too many beautiful women to choose from.

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the nigerian economy is not helping the men at all!

and besides most of them want to be finacially balanced before they get married

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dream on dreamer you chances of wining is 1 in 1million. good luck

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I wont encourage anybody to marry early. Marriage is not a 'spur of the moment' act that you engage in. It requires commitement for the rest of your life, and maturity on both partners. And don't forget that finances play an important role in our culture. When you are out of college in your early 20's, you may still have some road blocks ahead of you. Nigerian women, some of them are materialistic, and they want to date a well heeled guy, with a car and a house. By the time you finish renting your apartment, buying money, and fulfilling your family responsibilities, if you are the first born, ol'boy, you don old finish. Wedding itself is expensive, and when you have to do trado and white wedding, that is a drain in your pocket.

In America, you don't need that ceremony to be married. All what you do is to go to Court, pay ten or 20 dollars and you are married in the eyes of the law. Organize party the following weekend to celebrate your status as a married man. Nigeria, you pay dowry, buy gin for your father inlaw, lace for your mother inlaw, chocolate for your little brother inlaw, kolanuts for your grandfather in law, walking cane for the , and the money don disappear.

The reason why guys in yankees have kids quite early is that the system is different. Here a girl in high school gets pregnant, and she is automatically qualified for welfare. Can you imagine that? Before welfare was restructred by Clinton, some narrow minded women had kids in order to get more money from the federal government, without working.

Teenage pregnancy is a factor. Dont be suprised to see a woman in her late thirties being a grandmother. I have seen at least 2 cases.

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most of them would prefer enjoying their barchelor life than settling down early with a woman cos most of them would find it boring.

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why would people insist they must be rich before they get married, must people do a million naira wedding ?  i think a court wedding wont cost =N=50,000 ($350) and you don't neccessarily need to invite every body you no.

             I will soon get married if my babe completes her degree.

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