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When U See Ur Spouse As An Evil Entity,what Do U Do?

At all, this story is very much like a very bad dream , but when u feel the pains through the 3 yrs dat she felt it, i wonder if she is really like everyone else with so much patience and loss of action. This in deed is a very long story, of emotional,psycological, physical abuse of someone very close to me.It hurts me badly and i feel like i wld ave handled it differently, but my cuz is a very cool, patient and good hearted person, she doesn't deserve such pain, but recently, i found out dat she wasn't really exactly silly for being taken forgranted after all, but am not sure if she can really handle things herself cos of her nature, dats why i need pples advice as am the only person she confines and want to make sure dat i support her and give her my opinion but mine is not enof dats why here, to ask of other pples opinion

In a nutshell, My cuzin's hubby has been cheating on her since they both got married. (5)yrs now, he condems her by giving silly excuses for his lack of respect for her and thier marriage, the worst part is dat he acts like a responsible man to other pple but conceals his evil nature at home, it takes someone who is stays in the same house with them and who is sensitive to know dat things are not what it appears to be,

they dont stay in the same room, sent her out cos he claims he wants his privacy/he locks his door even while taking his bath or in the sitting room

he doesn't eat her meals, brings in meals from his sluts

he doesn't touch her, claims fatique and other silly reasons

he gives her abnormal rules to live by

he lies on her

he chats with his g/friends in front of her on the computer and phone/ on 2 occassions she has been called by them to insuilt her

He always boast to her dat noone wld believe her, cos his words wld be against hers, which is true

he recently beat her cos she managed to confront him when he tried setting her up dat she is the one cheating on him, yet he swore to pple dat he never touched her, this got her really scared cos she feels dat he maybe planing to kill her and noone wld believe

what he doesn't know is dat she has been keeping evidence of things he has been doing to her in the past 3 yrs,

to me this man has no remorse and with each passing confrontation ,he goes back to his action after his wife forgives him and try hard to be perfect, he improves by making sure dat he dates majorly married women so dat no one wld believe his wife.

I BELIEVE THE MAN IS CURSED AND NEEDS HELP, BUT HW CAN U HELP SOMEONE DAT FAILS TO BE REMORSE ORTRUTHFUL?

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8 answers

Thanks all 4 the contribution thus far,

YES, 2 LOVELY CHILDREN ARE INVOLVED,

She is however planning not to leave yet but to expose his tactics, infact she has made contact with one of his mistresses' hubby[she is keeping this part to herself cos i don't knw hw she wants to go about it here)i hope there wld be no risk involved to her?

CAN WE ALSO AVE A MAN'S POINT OF VIEW HERE?

She is just trying to find her feet, and working on the stigma and her selfesteem.

I just want her to find love again and not to shut herself in,i don't mean 4 her commiting adultery o, but just having positive relationship dat wld boost her up and make things easier for her till when she is ready to move on, What do u think?

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Are there children Involved?

I think she needs to leave him for sometime(NOT divorce),let him stay alone and enjoy his Mistresses while she goes somewhere else and reflect on the marriage and ger life generally.

Sadly,she alone can decide what to do,either to leave or to stay.i wish she makes the right choice.

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Even if, only a truly evil man will take it that far.

I think she should walk out of the marriage. No need keeping herself in a prison in the name of marriage.

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Just following the thread.

I dont live in Nigeria and dont understand life there enough to comment.

But I tell you what hubby and I were talking about this today.

And I am sorry for my sistas in Nigeria.  It breaks my heart what yall have to endure from your men.  And what they get away with or try to.

But funny enough us sistas here in the states have to take alot of crap from our guys.

I guess it does not matter where the man comes from if he is evil he is evil.

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@ poster

are you sure ur cousin has not done something bad to hurt him in the past. sometime will hurt people without knowing it and it can be worse if the victim doesnt open up. however, if this is not the case, it i suggest u tell ur cousin to go spiritual. go to pastor or something and let her talk to God on her own personally. that still fail??. . .then she needs not only run but flee. marriage is to enjoy not to endure, even if there is need to endure, i think 5yrs can be too much without any sight of changes in future.

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hope she has good qualifications for future employment.

Dont know how long they can live like cat and mouse.

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