«Home

Why Is The Man The Head Of The Family?

Why is the man the head of the family?

It is a generally accepted 'fact' all over the world that the man, the father, is the head of the family unit. Men Why is the man the head of the family?accept it, women accept it. As a 'scientist' (I was a science student, ok?), I am inclined to ask 'why?' Why are we men the de-facto leaders of the home.

[list][li]Is it because we are physically bigger and stronger?[/li]

[li]Is it because men are generally better leaders?[/li]

[li]Is it as a result of a conspiracy by men to keep women under?[/li]

[li]Perhaps it because women would rather not lead?[/li]

[li]Perhaps women are afraid of being ultimately responsible for the home?[/li][/list]

Despite the time I've spent thinking about it, I don't have a satisfactory answer. Do you have the answer? Would you like to share it with us? Please register and start contributing! Why is the man the head of the family?

If there is no a concrete reason for making the man the leader, it is only a matter of time before some women start clamoring for the leadership position in the home! In a few years we might have families where the wife will say "I am the head of this family and my husband and children are subordinates!"

Abomination? Why?

Avatar
Newbie
122 answers

Now I know what they say about your small pr1ck is true.

0
Avatar
Newbie

This thread is damn old

0
Avatar
Newbie

I have read all the write ups so far, you all tried. The main reason why man is the head and will continue to be the head is that God wants it to be so. Biologically speaking, in man we have xy chromosones while in woman we have xx chromosones (biblically the first assignment given to the family after creation of man was to be fruitful and multiple and replenish the earth. Genesis 1:28 This is the primary assignment of man.) and in reproduction it is the man's chromosone that determines whether the child will be a boy or a girl when the y chromosone from the man joins with x from the woman the result is a boy child (xy) but if the x chromosone from the man joins with the x from the woman the result is a girl child (xx). any body who feels that the woman should be the head of the family is challenging God[/color][color=#000099].

0
Avatar
Newbie

The biblical support for the man being the head of the family (as Christ is the head of the Church) is more akin to him being the team captain and not necessarily the best player on the team. Its a position of responsibility, and not of a tyrannical authority.

0
Avatar
Newbie

Raly? My family culture, the women are the head of the house ooo So no comment on this than

0
Avatar
Newbie

Becos he is from Mars

0
Avatar
Newbie

When we let go of our ego we start realising the power and strength in each person who has been created in the image God who is the power and the strength.

Maybe we should all stop and ask ourselves what do we mean by "head". Is it the one who has a final word on everything? Who will always have a superior opinion on everything? That sounds like a delusional self image that some people may hold. Such a person does not and will never exist!

The fact of the matter is that leadership has nothing to do with sex or gender. The very God that we are Trying to use to defend our positions, with whom nothing is impossible, who never ever said that the female is weaker, is free to locate leadership capabilities in anybody irrespective of sex.

The X or Y chromosome is as significant as the colour of your eyes, skin or hair in the grand scheme of things.

For those of you who want to use God to win an inconsequential argument, remember god is a leader. He made all human beings in his image. He did not create Only Adam in his image and then made Eve as a watered down inferior image. The bible has been abused over the ages to defend racism, sexism, murder, greed and violence. Isn't it time all this madness stoped.

Some men are strong right. But some women are stronger than some men. Some women are intellectually more gifted than some men. Some women are better strategists than some men.

For me, running a family is about letting everybody play to his strength. There are mothers who run the fiances in their homes perfectly well, just as well as some fathers do. Yet there are fathers who are completely hopeless in this area. These fathers may be very good at making money but no so good at managing it. And yes there are women who will take all the money in the house and buy all the make up and shoes in the city.

My own father was physically strong, very eloquent, outspoken, very charismatic, a disciplinarian, influential and could cook up a storm. My mother was more reserved, caring, motivating, self effacing and a very good manager of the home finances. Always held a clear vision for the family. Who was the head? I wonder. They just happend to be a functional partnership. That is what marriage is all about. Not dominion of one partner over the other.

This head story is neither here no there. My point? Chauvinists are just as sexist as feminist. Each individual comes to this earth with strengths and weaknesses. The sooner we realise this and make maximal use of every body's strength, the sooner we will find peace and progress in the homes, the churches, the comunities, the workplaces and even our countries.

Cheers!

0
Avatar
Newbie

I guess it is to support the adage that says that 2 heads are better than 1.

Man has 2 heads, he also has balls. hehehehehehe!

All jokes apart, I think it is because of the guts to take, face and break through risks and challenges without breaking or falling apart under pressure. Some women are challenging the conventional wisdom these days though, but they are just a drop of water in an ocean. Without you labelling me as a chauvinist, let's face the truth it's man's world let women learn to live and thrive in it afterall we can't live without each other.

0
Avatar
Newbie

thanks seun,

today men and women have different opportunity and if you agree with me. women do better.

women canot find thier match becos men are afraid of their success. well i advise one should judge a woman not by her success as this is a gift from family and friends.

But if she dos have the xteristic of a real soft woman she ought to be.

if you see beyound this you are the HEAD.

0
Avatar
Newbie

It is so because it is an instruction from Above.

0
Avatar
Newbie

check you Bible, your answer lies within. man was given dominion over every thing that was created by God and that include women.

0
Avatar
Newbie

you accept and agree with your point. good man

0
Avatar
Newbie

Godsgirl,

Your husband, whoever he turns out to be, is a blessed guy.

I am blessed to have a woman like you at home. I love her to bits and she knows it but she gives me respect and makes me feel like a king at home. We know that with the way we have our home set up, and with God on our side, we can never go wrong.

In every society where the notion of man not being the head of the family is strongly adhered to, family values have plumetted. The man being the head of the family does not make him an authoritarian person. He will always need the support of his intelligent half and together, they will can do exploits.

* Please check out the grown up women who advocate that the man is NOT the head of the family and you'll discover that there's hardly any of them who still has her family intact. Those of them who might be recently married; tell them to come back after 10 years of marriage.

Family headship is not about superiority or authoritarianism but a symbolic position.

0
Avatar
Newbie

my husband is the head of the family ,he pay rent ,sevices the cars when they are due,still give me cash inspite of what i earn makes sure the family is well provied for at all times and lot of things i cant even beging to mention. my dear i dont want to contest for that possition is his for life.

0
Avatar
Newbie

Una don turn my name upside down.

He had better treat me like a queen and guess what? He doesn't have to be in charge!

And about his head thing! What the hell does he have to be in charge of when he contributes only financially to the well being of the home?

For crying out loud, men want women who work and take care of the home. At the end of the day, ladies do 100 times more than men, but yet these lazy asses want to take the glory of what they didn't work for? I dey craze?! Make him come dey preach leadership nonsense to me make him see wetin go happen to am. Ode!

0
Avatar
Newbie

Since families are not like countries, then Men will not act like presidents (dictators). when they say men should be the head of the family don't see as one male that has the power to do and undue or a man that listens to himself only.

Men being the head means he is there to lead and give direction with the support of the wman of course. Afterall the saying that behind every succesful man there is a woman is not a fluke but reality. Men will only succed when women supports them without which the man fails.

These days feminism has simply turned everything upside down. The notion that there should be "equality" between an man and woman is confusing and distorting the original family arrangement.

So Michelle don't you think it will be fun if your man (who takes charge) treats you like a queen?

0
Avatar
Newbie

Usually religion is the reason for a the general acceptance anyways of a man being head of the family. Depending on culture and country or whatnot it's not unusual for mom or grandma or w/e to be running things.

Some women accept men being a head of household, some don't. I'm not a scientist yet but I'm a Forensic Science major and about to be in my 4th yr and i'm not so inclined to ask why are men USUALLY the head of house but w/e. My home is different to maybe some folks on here, my mother is the head of our house. Men tend to be stronger and bigger than women but I don't think that's usually the reason why but if you're abusive then being bigger and stronger helps. I don't think men are better leaders just because they're lol I don't even want to get started on that. This is a pretty partiarchal world we live in, it's not a conspiracy that women are kept under or whatnot, if you're in power or used to being in power I mean why give someone else the leg up and you don't have to or need to?

The question of Perhaps it because women would rather not lead doesn't really make sense lol. What women do you speak of specifically when you are are women afraid of being ultimately responsible for the home. There are plenty of stay at home moms who are SOLELY responsible for taking care of the house and kids and w/e else and in that sense they run the household and like I said my mother and a lot of women I know have the most say-so in their homes. When I have my own home and family I admit I like getting my way but if I do get married or just live long-term or whatnot with the man I love then I'll run the house with him but not behind him, and that has nada to do with gender, I just don't like being ordered around lol.

You asking why is the man the head of the family is already assuming that the audience you're asking/speaking already thinks or well knows even that the man is the head of house and by house I mean family too. It's 2007 now and it was 2005 when you made this post and well um not trying to think you've lived under a rock but many women have always had leadership in their home, no need to clamor for it. There ARE women (some wives even) that are the head of the family, see I'm not a total jerk so I won't be calling my husband and kids my subordinates, my house won't be the military or something. Women being head of family an abomination absolutely not, same for a man, it's who is the most capable whether they have a joystick or womanliness, I've never known someone to be only competent because of what was in their pants or skirt or shorts or w/e.

0
Avatar
Newbie

We are not saying women should be limited, what i am saying is that, Position shouldn't be dragged with men by women except if the man voluteer

0
Avatar
Newbie

In Nigeria where presidents and governors do and undo just because they are in charge, what stops the heads of the home to also act as dictators. Just like how the citizens are trying to limit the power of out leader, we women are doing the same. We beg you "men" to please stay out and let us ac chieve our goal. We don't like pains in the Bottom.

0
Avatar
Newbie

uhmmmmmmmmmmmmmm Thank God for God

0
Avatar
Newbie

What? Ordained by Man? If it is so why has the family been relatively stable until the rise of thje feminist movement?

The truth is women are assistants in the family. The man is the head but in the absense of a man then a women can assume the role.

Even the Bible also recognises the importance the man being the head of the family.

Ephesians 5:22-33 says it all. The passage also caution against men maltreating their spouses.

So my dear ladies in the house, a man being the head of the family doe s not mean that the man will be didctator but a loving father and husband who is ready to sacrifice for the family- that to me is a good leader.

cheers.

0
Avatar
Newbie

Because my God said so. Inspired by the Spirit of God, St Paul tells us the intention of the Father God in 1 Cor 11:3. For those of you who are familiar with St Paul's writings, you will recall that whenever Paul is not led of God to speak on an issue, but of "himself", he is careful to say something like, "I, not God" to ensure that the reader is aware that this is "his own" opinion. However, 1 Cor 11:3 is not one of those times Paul spoke for himself. But this was actually God speaking through Paul.

If anyone does not like my response, they may take it up to the creator, GOD. Go ahead and ask Him why. After all, He is the one who said, "ask and you shall receive" right? I cannot help you further. I choose to obey God-not obey what i "feel" or what "people" think. Everyone has a choice to rebel against His Word. Thank God for free will. I am Christian, If you are not a believer, then find out how an issue such as this is handled in your own area of belief.

This is my stance on the matter

Agape!

0
Avatar
Newbie

It was ordained by man, not God.

0
Avatar
Newbie

Still on this post, uhm, very funny, Life is very vast for everyone to learn from

0
Avatar
Newbie

and from a neutral standpoint

@Weslyn A, Micheline and other Femnists

THERE IS NO EQUALITY IN THE WEST (unlike what most believe). WHAT YOU HAVE ARE IDEAS AND LAWS BASED ON PATRIACHACY

I don't think there is equality in nature or any culture for that matter when it comes to the matter of the sexes.

I think nature made the sexes complementary not competitors. One sex is more suited to certain things and the other sex more suited to others.

Infact, feminism in itself looks like it does have harmful effects to women.

The above is  a hypothesis. Ask me and il tell you why it could be so.

0
Avatar
Newbie

Hi,

Nature made it so.But dt is not 2 say dt men shld love it over d women.women havea as much d same brain cells as men(no diff) n some have even proved 2 b more intelligent dn men.dD woman is designed 2 b d helper of d man,d one who softens his HARD  n ROUGH LIFE,the one who remembers those things he cant n who does those things he cant do or find time 2 do.WOMEN ARE NOT 2ND CLASS CITIZENS.It is only irresponsible men who think in that light(alth some women's behavoiur may sometimes make 4 such thoughts).DR IS MORE 2 EVERY WOMAN NO MATTER HOW UGLY OR UNINTELLIGENT SHE MAY SEEM.I ENCOURAGE D MEN 2 MAKE OUT TIME N APPRECIATE DR WOMEN.

Have u ever thought about what this life would have been without WOMEN?

0
Avatar
Newbie

Again with greatest of respect

A lot of people here especially our women thinks that economic power and all those modern choices is what the leadership of the home is all about.

No, it is a fallacy that has run for generation, even though God want men to provide for their family, the headship we are talking here is spiritual and even there are times that the woman may not agree with her husband but a simple prayer will open the eyes of the Husband and direct him right to lead the family to the 'promised land' or where the family wil find peace and fulfilment with God.

It is an accepted fact that the majority of women are emotinal and there is a reason for that and it is for the will of God to be done. The bible said that the woman will always relly on the husband, it did not say financially but we know it means emotionally. A family with a father (in vast majority of cases) always shows in terms of the diffrence of that fatherood.

I respect all those opinion which are predominately feminist but One thing I am sure is that 95% of those feminist would sing diffrent tune in less tahn 20 years.

I always add and remove 20 years from present age and that will give you what position you will look like in 20 years, so the women the ones who are lucky to still have the headship of the house will be eternally grateful to the almighty God and the ones without will question whether there is God.

Heaven and Earth will change , the word of God and God will never change. He or she who has ears let him/her hears, What God has establish is not a political football and will never be one. May God spare our lives and the group here tobe able to have this debate in 20 years time. The position would be clear without a shadow of doubt.

May the blessing of the Lord continue to abide with us.

0
Avatar
Newbie

You always start well, but later fall brutally.

So my being emotional, less prone to violence and deliquent behaviour, softer and smothering doesn't make me a good leader?

So a good leader should be violent, prone to deliquence, tough and only you know what else?

Hey does that make sense to you? 'cause it doesn't to me!

0
Avatar
Newbie

Bother Seun and Sister michelle a home need a leader by way of vision . The same way that nations require leaders for directions that is also reason homes need a (good) leader. Leader in the sense that goals and objectives are set and pursued.

There are many examples of disorganisation where male figures are absent. African american communities are classsic example.

That is not to say that Women cannot be good leaders, of course they can be, but, it is usually in the absense of a men.

the sense of responsibility and self-reliance was learnt from my Father not mother. Women tend to be more emotional than men (probalby that is why they are less prone to violence and other delinquent behaviour) , softer, and smothering- which is not a really good qualities of what a leader of a family should have.

0
Avatar
Newbie

Yes, we are. We women feminist activists are very satisfied by that concession.

However, why does the home need a leader anyway? Must there by a despot in every hut?

0
Avatar
Newbie

@ michelin89

You seem to be so bent on your opinion that women can also be the head of the family.

Well i'd say it depends. If you're plaining to become the head of your family, it's ok.

there are most families that are controled by women.

There has to be a final end to this argument.

women are also humans God created them, so if they want to rule, they can go ahead and rule.

are you satisfied now?

0
Avatar
Newbie

You were sounding too rational. I knew you were going to go astray sooner or later.

It was sooner than I thought!

0
Avatar
Newbie

Yes it possible but not advisable. There should be always someone who the "the buck stops at his table". I always ask: if there was not suppose to be a leader why did God created Adam before Eve? Mind you a man been the head of the family does not make a woman inferior (becuase my mother is not inferior to my dad neither is my wife inferior to me). What makes a family stable is the protection the man gives to the women and children (damn! the economy is changing all that) and the love and guidance the woman gives to her man and children, which makes the family balanced.

I also want to ask the question. Why is that our parents who have a more traitional family arrangements has more stable marriages that we.

In a society where women have more life chioces and freedom, that society tend to have more unstable marriages.

That is correct.

0
Avatar
Newbie

You know it is possible to live without either the man or the woman being 'in charge' or 'the head'. Lots of people live as equal partners and discuss and negotiate things between them perfectly well. It's not the case that women want to take over. They just want to be equal. It's very simple.

A marriage isn't a boat so why talk of captains? You might as well say 'a football team needs 11 players' so 11 people should be married together. Not relevant. (In any case, you get female boat captains, lol).

If you want to live your life in a traditional relationship, that's fine. But there's nothing wrong with other people who don't. Not everyone has to live their lives or run their marriages in the same way as you.

0
Avatar
Newbie

If you know then why are u wasting your energy in typing. These xtians sef. they always want to force their beliefs on people as if na them know pass!

0
Avatar
Newbie

michelin89 wake up girl, we can never be equals cause 2 captains can never manage a boat so the saying goes. And the words of wisdom are ways to correction. The problem is that the woman wants to take the place of the man which is practically impossible. Come back to Africa and tell your husband, if he is African that you want to lead the home like a man. And i think you are not a Christain too cause my views are practically what the Holy Bible had thought us. If you know plenty ask God why he said the woman must be submissive to the man. Because he knew from time that people like you would want to take the place of a man.

0
Avatar
Newbie

Ol boy leave that side o! it really depends on the personalities of the couple! I remember its my mum that always 'dealt' with us whenever we misbehaved, pops never gave us the lashings we needed, he couldn't stand such violence.

I still believe men are the head of the family (as ordained by God) but in certain functions, the woman takes the lead!

0
Avatar
Newbie

uhm, how bold, strong are women when it comes to handling violence in the home or if an outlander is coming to have the family torn into pieces, can a woman stand in place of a man, ? only for those who understood my questions

0
Avatar
Newbie

cos God said so, shut up and get that steppin

0
Avatar
Newbie

It's just like saying that because a dog's tail was cut off, all its puppies will be born without a tail. Isn't that ridiculous?! If they had ever existed then anything that happened betweem Adam and Eve should remain between them.

0
Avatar
Newbie

@ozoneflake, you need to get a grip on the anatomy of the human body. FYI, the human ribs are 12 in both male and female.Plus if God took a rib outta Adam to make Eve, doesn't that make Adam one rib lesser than Eve ?

Stop all these rubbish all in the name of defending the silly notion of man being any superior to woman. Wake up and smell the coffee, we are nothing but equals ! Okay ?

0
Avatar
Newbie

@gina lemme disagree with you first, that women are stronger than men. Every thing been equal the man must have an edge.

Gods wisdom is not like ours. The absence of those two ribs only, makes the woman the weaker sex. In her own way the woman is unique. God made man in a hurry and gave him raw streghnt but the woman He took time to create. To compesate her for the raw strenght He made her dominion over man. Look at all the great men of old and today. Both war lords and simpletons. Women have the way to their heart her while they only seek to pull her skirt.

But because of that raw streghnt to be strong in fending for the family the man got his egde over the woman. She was made to clean the sweat off the man when he comes home beaten by sun. Thats why she was made a helper. To releif and sooth him.

0
Avatar
Newbie

@militia

Wetin i do you eh? is it because i added eko oni baje in my profile, has that made you think i am an agbero or someone that's not responsible? well i am way above that, so no comment on that because i can only defend myself when i am wrong.

as for the being the head, i only said my mind and i also told you about what i would do if i was to be called to take an action, so why must you talk that way about me eh? you have your opinion and i came to share mine, so take the ones you think sounds sweet to you and then leave the ones you feel is not right to you and stop pointing at me please, you cant have 2 captain in a ship but you can have a captain and an assistant captain, or have you heard of any country with 2 presidents at a time before?

and for your information, i was born into Christianity, fine, but i have personally taken Christianity as my own choice of life, so if you think i don't know what i am doing, then forget it cos you are way outta line. what ever you believed in, what have you done to prove that you are actually right?

most of the things in the bible that i read, that has been scheduled to happen on earth are happening now, so those ones enough has proven to me that i am not on the wrong path so take that from me ma.

0
Avatar
Newbie

01 abeg, I nor come find your trouble for this forum so I nor understand why you come dey find mine? Who you dey call childish? Me? Hee hee! See this boy! You dey believe something wey your parents force into your head when you small. As you don even grow u never still sabi prove your belief but you carry am for head like say u life depend on it. Tell me who is this childish for here?

0
Avatar
Newbie

Why should i be a full housewife because you wanna take up your responsibility as the ''head'' of the home. I'll joggle my duty at home with my job, have only a child, so it wont be too stressful for me. So far i get to save my own income, you as the head can cater for all the family money issues without as much as looking at me for a penny.

Now thats what is called the human head !

On a more serious note now, honeric01, Not some men, but most people that claim to be men these days are damn selfish. They get away with it alot though, cuz women hold their marriages sacred and would do anything to hold it together(esp african women) but the fact is, men aren't worth calling men these days no more.

0
Avatar
Newbie
Your answer
Add image

By posting your answer, you agree to the privacy policy and terms of service.