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At What Point Does A Man Begin To Feel Smouldered In A Relationship? Abeg

I need candid advice because it would appear 'too much love' has even worse effects than 'too little love' in my experience. What if a girl doesn't want to do shakara and really wants to show a guy she appreciates him - with calls,- general attention not necessarily sex,  Is that a reason for him to become wary? or weary? why should that be a bad thing? Infact how much attention is too much attention? 

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11 answers

Thanks for your advice!

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i had to read smoooooth's comment a few times to understand say na yab be that

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You've made Iceblue turn flamingRed, Smoooooth that wasn't smooth at all.

You literally saying she gets screwed all the time. Man ! below the belt.

Bad yarn !

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you don't know poo about my boyfriend, so don't even go there. if you can't reply without making it personal, then shut the hell up. does that mean a guy who doesn't want time out is less of a human being?

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I think iice has said it all. We want our women to show us love without getting us choked.We want our women to show us love and yet provide space for us to get things done.We want to be loved and allowed to be responsible in all aspects of our lives.We want to allocate time for church,football,friday nites,business meetings and some form of charity work without making our women feel we love them less.

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I guess it depends on the guy.

Usually it starts with bombarding them with calls asking where they are, what are they doing, what time are they coming.  .  .never-ending questions.

Then, they can't even go out without some interrogation of where are they going?, what are they going to do? Who is going to be there?

Then, it's been a hectic day and they come home to find peace and quiet but noooooooo it's what is wrong? Why wont you talk to me?  How can i help you? It's like you this that this.  .  .

Then, it's like every corner they look, the woman is there, it's suffocating.

It's important to give them their space and i don't mean one should disappear from their life.

Know what to ask, when to ask and how to ask without making them feel like you are crowding them.

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@OP

go and read 'men are from mars women are from venus' by John Gray

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it depends on the guy, but ask yourself if you spend too much time with a guy, he can become smothered.  

he needs to feel free, do stuff on his own.  if your man has opportunity to do stuff with his friends, whereby you don't call him and let him be so it doesn't feel like you're keeping tabson him.  like if he's like im going drinking with my friends, don't call him or call him when you know the pub would have closed?

if you and him give each other some space, and he says you're smothering him, then its just an excuse for him to end things and itsd not your fault.  

summary:  the important thing is space

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yep but i think it makes us come across as all 'cute n lovable'(its not as if u ppl kno wot u want either-see 'how do u like to b appreciated for proof!')

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Spoilt

Haha, I think we've lived the same life. After a while their actions became so predictable, and I ended up the one bored and moved on.

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Adaeze

The issue with most women is that they think that men think like them. This is clearly not the case, my solution to you is if your man is weary due to being smothered, cut back on the attention you give him just a little. He'll definitely take note of it and start to wonder why the sudden change and poof! goes the weariness he had in the beginning. Men hate to be responsible for their woman's happiness, and when you bombard him with too much attention, it makes him feel suffocated. The problem is women make their men their lives, and men make their women a part of their lives almost like an added bonus, and that is how men have an easier time moving on after a break up than a woman does. It is because they have only lost a part of their lives, in the contrary, a woman is left heartbroken because she's lost her life and airbag (her man). The best way to be successful in your relationship is to have a LIFE of your own, and I know as a woman you are an 'emotional being', but act like your man is an added bonus as well, you'll have him craving for your attention in no time. Good luck.

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