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Can A Nigerian Girl And Her Father Be Romantically Involved?

I ask this ? because I'm married to a Nigerian man whom i love dearly. But I'm having trouble with his teenage daughter. They spend time in her room with the door closed and locked plus they often leave at all times of the night and day without informing me. One day the left at 4:45 am and came back around 7 am in time for to go to school. When i do inquire about their whereabouts he states we went to the Mosque. (He's Muslim). He washes her clothes, she walks around in front of him wearing only a towel, he goes inside the bathroom sometimes when she's in the shower, and often waits on her inside the room when she gets out the shower and he shops for her on a regular basis. Don't get me wrong i know father's loves their daughters but this relationship is very strange and besides she just arrived in the U.S. I've tried everything i can to make her like me but nothing works. She does evil things behind his back to me and her brother and when i tell him he says im just being jealous. Pls help, do you think I'm being paranoid?

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121 answers

poster,

Get a good camera phone with enough memory and activate the camera, all there conversation will be recorder, he has get what he want and if you eventually know the truth there is nothing you can do, too late for you.

All nigerians are not like that.

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@BreiAna

Is your husband innocent? Let us know what you found out and how things panned out!

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for me l cant believed your story,a Nigerian is more clever than you imagine,in anycase tell your story to the marines,and leave Nigeria out of your perceived mischief ,here in Nigeria we have more serious issued to attend to,not not your rooster and bull story,

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Hello BreAna

Thought about this some more, if you have been married for 8 years with son by this man, did he tell you about his daughter years ago? Do you have any contact with your inlaws to find out more? Were you consulted about her coming to live with you all, if she is 16 is she going to be around much longer anyway, maybe she has come over to go to college and further education? You need to assert yourself in your home with regard house rules, teenagers can run rings around you if you let them, they always find weaknesses and play on them. There are lots of books in libary about being a step mom. As many people that reply will all give differing views that could help or make you more worried. If he is a good muslim man, I really don't think he would take a 2nd wife and just bring her claiming it is his daughter. She's too young to be the first wife. Kids brought up in Nigeria are much more innocent in general than UK & US perhaps you are finding her youth and beauty a little unnerving, as an 8 year marriage would be past the initial honeymoon stuff and his attention being focused on her is a rivalry she is playing on as a teen. How long has she been in the household, few days, weeks, months? He says he took her to mosque early one morning, so she is brought up a muslim too, then you should assert to her you find her immodesty around the house indecent, buy her a robe to wear and cover her up, you are the woman of the house. Its a serious matter if he is touching his daughter she needs protecting, buy a bolt for her bedroom door, so she can lock him out, she won't want is attentions either and she would need serious help with this. If you have been duped in some way as others have said just 199 dollars for the home test hair kit then conclusive proof not daughter if that's the worry.

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You just lost your husband to his 1st Wife. Sorry for your loss. Just be smart, take your son and move on. His 1st Wife might Bleep you up sooon

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hmm thats green card father.

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Infact dat gal is not her daughter, plain n simple which kind father and daughter relationship be dat. My dear shine ur eye b4 they bundle u out of ur home

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Curioser and curioser

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@WaVixon, first of all you don't know anything about me to be calling me a slowpoke. And what gives you the idea i cant get a man. Is it because I've been married and trusted someone for 8 yrs. If you read my post I asked for advice because of my suspicion. So its sounds to me you have something against me just because what. I asked a ? And before you criticize me think about how u would feel if you're facing something like this. And to everyone else he hasn't seen his daughter for 7 yrs and she's 16 years old. And to the poster that stated there's other things that go on that makes me unsure about everything. Yes she calls him daddy and her brother which is his son only calls her Auntie. So yes, it makes me confuse not a manless slowpoke

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LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOL

GOLDHIGO

I ASSUME U JOINED NAIRALAND JUST TO TELL ME THAT!!

YOU LIL PERVE!!!!

U ARE NOT SERIOUS ONE PENNY!

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This is so disgusting. Poster, uv been avoiding the truth, lying to yoursefl.

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@ayettymama

in nigeria i think it will be difficult!

even when i walk around in shorts everyone is screamin!

but i guess its diff cos we always have visitors

i guess if its a small cosy flat or summin u can walk arnd in wat u like!

God nos wen i get my apartment in naija i wont be wearin clothes!!!

ill be sunbathin on the roof mayne!

Pls I will like to live near your house when u get back to naija, just post me the address and I will acquire a plot of land at your backyard

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If there's anything u can do to catch him on bed with the so called daughter red handed do it.

Also suggest a DNA test and watch his re-action.

Her daughter can't come into ur house and hate u. After u've contributed to her coming to USA.

U just have to stop him if he has NOT gotten the green card yet.

BE WISE

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There is a chance this is all innocent and she is jealous of you and

trying to just get her dads attention. She's testing you.

However, to be conclusive you can get a DNA hair test done

neither of them has to know, check on the net for companies

that do this. Get the results sent to a friends house.

Then if not daughter you know what to do, be cool

don't let him/her know what you plan to do if the results

prove not dad and daughter, you will have too look out for

yourself and son, so I beg you to be very cool in your own

interests. My muslim husband had 4 daughters by previous

marriage who tested me to hell!

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my dear, you are inside a swimming pool and soap is entering into your eyes

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@POSTER

Hey, confirm if the girl's middle name is GOODLUCK (in whatever language). B/c she is out to unseat u. Lol

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looooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooool

lolololololololololololololol

is that wat u est indians do on our aff forums now??

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@ poster, you just have to be very careful and be vigilant

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Blandyne You West Indian?

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This is obvious. That girl is not his daughter you have been decieved

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that is his other wife in Nigeria,he use u to get what he want but nevertheless if u can get a video tape recorder so that when ever they are inside the room so that u can place it so as to get the information u need from them. Pls do it, good luck

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hmmn, Eya, has the poster responded?

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. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

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i have actually watched a naija movie which is based on this kind of story but the daughter ended up having a baby for the dad

just be careful and dont jump into crazy conclusion yet

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john kent, even if this story didnt happen to poster

it happens to soo many women home and abroad

plati kmt-kiss ma teeth

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This is just a made up story. Just reading the story absolutely tells me ur Nigerian.

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Even with a Green Card citizenship can be revoked! All it takes is a few documents sent to the FBI and a through investigation and bam that loser is locked up both him and the 'wife' they can charge him for many accounts including Inbreeding.

Orginal poster- better do something about it now, before he chop your money and leave you stranded with nothing while they are trying to make a baby.

@ayett- what does kmt mean?

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divorce immediately,the man is giving it to her badly

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@Poster,

I suggest you ask him to bring you home to naija with his "daughter". His reaction will give you a hint on what he is up to. then you just go ahead and drop him like hot coal!

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Most likely they are lovers. They may even have done the traditional marriage back home, so she may see herself as a bona fide wifey. The girl may not have known the whole truth about his marital status when they started so you might just be an unexpected inconvenience to her. How close are you to his family back home? Do you go and visit them sometimes? In Africa, marriage is not only between 2 people. You may not be African but you're also partly African now through marriage.

I have seen something similar before. A guy was lodging a female "cousin" in the same flat with his European wife and their two kids. He seemed rather proud of it. The cousin of course was his Naija babe, even though he had another long term babe in Nigeria that was still at University.

I was not close to his wife. In fact I had never met her since we live in different countries. But his wife seemed like a rather sweet lady each time we talked on phone. Disgusting but you know, when it comes to our Naija thing, you keep yourself out of other people's business. Going to tell his wife about his game could incur you eternal enmity on his and he's family's part, including invocation of diabolical and church powers. Not superstitious but who needs more enemies when friends are already difficult enough. Am not saying that families back home are always aware of this kind of thing.

Immigration matter may be too late now because after 8 years he would have secured the green thing. In fact he would not be so cockey if he hadn't. Chances are this game started just after he secured his documents. Sorry for the long essay. Nuff said.

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monkey

continue scratching ur head

then quote the NIV version

msceeew

inno many men de Self-Service ova my phto!

its just disturbing that some sick bipolar people do to!

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Ok. some1 please lock this topic. tired of seeing the same opinions over and over again.

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Not only Nigerians. I know of a Camerounian that did this

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That must be his real wife. You have to turn FBI on them. Try to find the papers he brought here with. I think a DNA test is required nowadays. If you do not find that then the papers should say if that is his child or not. You can also just report them to immigration and they can do the investigation. People are just plain evil. To move his wife into the house with you guys is a miracle. You have to look at it that way. Otherwise you would have never known until the day he gets sworn in as a citizen and his real wife picks him up and you don't see them again. People are heartless

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Haven't read previous posts, but has anyone suggested hidden cameras yet? That should work, nothing beats evidence like that.

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kmt

denzel dont let me insult you here!!!!!

proverbs 10;21!!!

YOU need to go back to school!

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kmt

im not anserin any of u again!

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LMMFAO! YOU are SO wrong for that LOL! btw that shoe in your avatar is to DIE for omg, it's hot!!!

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jaquan

where have you been ive missed you!!!

*proffesional derailer here!*

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You need to be going to sunday school ,too much trey songz. The bible didnt even say this too.

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i dont know if this is funny or not, hmmm

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^^^

thats exactly what it says!

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^^its prob against thier religion to shout!

*runs away*

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And l wont rule out the husband using her contentious  daughter for saremental functions

well in Nigeria of today some demons dont want to know who is who

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To the poster, excuse my word but how f--kin silly could you be. Even without asking people here on Nairaland, couldn't you have figured that she isn't his daughter.

Let me give you the facts. She is his wife that he has married in Nigeria, probably while you are still living together.

I speak from experience. I am a Nigerian male here in good 'ol Deutschland and that sh-t is common with african men here but i am not saying it is all of them but mostly among the really older looking ones not the ones in their twenties.

I feel your pain but at the same time i feel like i would cuss you out if you were my sister for letting such sh-t slide.

Damn!!!!

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@poster

So many probability with the scenario you painted.

It reasonable to conclude from your post that you'd confronted your husband with your suspicion before posting on net

Then gather evidence DISCRETELY using camera or private investigator.

The result of the camera or investigation will determine whether you need to confront him or not

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