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Can Adultery Help My Marriage?

This is my situation:

My wife is heavily pregnant; apart from the fact that she's hardly recognisable from the beautiful figure 8 I married(not her fault of course !)the mere mention of lovemaking gets her very angry talk less of the act itself.

I have not done it in almost 5 months,I'm nearly losing my mind,please advise me what should i do? I have this my colleague(engaged to a guy in the US) who has been giving me the green lights all these months , should I just do it to keep my sanity and possibly my marriage?

I don't want to hypocrisy please, & no unworkable ideas from unmarried virgins please, i need some empathy here. So for married peeps and those with some experience,what should I do?

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127 answers

havent u heard of using ur hands ? lol

but on a more serious note: sex with a colleague is a very appealing way to a disaster! no try am oo. try and tlk to ur wife about ur urges and the temptation ur going thru u neva know she mite even give in to u if she feels guilty or even jealous at the thought of u doin some other woman.

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i have heard of times without number when women say their doctors advice them to have sex regularly with their spouse since it helps a great deal for some reasons of childbirth.

some women even force their their hubby to have sex with them even till their EDD.

so i believe sex is safe for all time of the pregnancy except for positions applied during sex. one could think of cheating as an option in this case when your spouse is on strike for some reasons but i do believe a counselling from a medical expert could help. try visiting the clinic with your wife on the days she goes for prenatal and get the best advice and pep talks to resolve the issue.

its also a lesson for the upcoming mums in the house to keep track of the feelings or sexual urge of their spouse during pregnancy stage.

rather than crucify @poster its wise to place yourself at that spot and imagine the mental torture you may go through!!!

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Yes, adultery will help you marriage. When you must have committed it, you will be tempted to go marry another wife, and then when you have two wives, you will have all the love and peace in the world. Anu ofia.

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@ poster

u have to face it. Adultery isnt the way out! What understanding did u have with your wife before u got married? sex is important in marriage i know but it is not all about the chukwu chukwu.

What u have to do is communicate with your wife on what she thinks ok

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guy, i am married and will advise u as follows, women are different with pregnancy,when my wife was pregnant she was always all over for me sex,my guy na me dey fia sef mak i shoot the pikin out,so you see the game different,however if must do the thing, i will advise you just go for short term (sharp sharp) thing that will help you better than going for the green light cause that light might turn red and sour later, i advised a friend to do same when the wife wouldn't allow him get to her during pregnancy and the thing worked,just banging the babe that's all no emotions and when madam returns to normal you just fashy the babe one time

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The only interpretation i have about your situation is that maybe you just picked her from the street and impregnated her because if you really got married to her, then you are bound to keep the marital vows.

ADULTERY HAS NEVER HELPED ANY MARRIAGE AND YOUR SITUATION IS NOT AND CAN NEVER BE AN EXCEPTION

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@Zebu

There's nothing new under the sun, I am in the same situation but in my case it is on medical advise and after having waited for years for this pregnancy, am compling to the letter and it's 8 months now. Am neither dead nor have I cheated on my wife. I think it has to do with the state of your mind and core values. Ask yourself if the table is turned around will you take that excuse from her? I answered this question honestly to my self and made up my mind to patiently wait to see my little angle and then resume from my sabatical leave

Wish you the best

Good advice.

You need to know marriage is more than sex, there companionship, theres friendship. if you do not have intercourse with your wife for nine months you no go die.

It depends on the kind of value you place on your marriage. Check am.

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Adultery is not any excuse, ok. you use ur head not ur d**k

Wish u luck in life

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U are really mean o, advise am well now

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Cant you self-service?

Dream of that figure 8 and jerk off!

that should last you another 5 months, by then she will be back in shape!

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well definately adultery will not help ur marriage. This is an issue u have to discuss with ur wife, u also have to understand her condition. Besides, u have ur marriage vows to keep.The damage few minutes of adultery cancause will far more me greater than holding on for few more months.

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That will be so dangerous for you. And it cannot be remedied.

Olychibuzo

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@Poster,

Forget about your Greenlight or multi-colour lady remember that what goes round will surely comes round,so becareful and exercise more patience.

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According to medical experts, doing it during pregnancy eases delivery and hasten labor. My candid advice is for you to talk to your wife and do it for YOU. Best of luck

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Glad to know you're moving forward. Adultery can NEVER help your marriage. Besides, if it's the first time your wife's having a baby, you just have to bear with her(from experience). What many women fail to understand is that at a particular stage of pregnancy, they need to be having sex regularly. Failure of which could result in difficulty in giving birth. My Bro's wife had to go jogging every morning because she was 'tight' for the baby. My colleague's wife had to go for c/s because she didn't allow her hubby regularly too.

Do take care and God give you wisdom.

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ha ha ha ha

this is funny.

i cant still believe that such men exist in this planet earth . if you cant hold on for a while then go and become a rev father that is the best but for it . by the way during your youthful year were you not having it in quatom. don't just endanger the life of that woman by entering that you walking stick inside that hard disk. just wait a while and ask God for direction he will help you . don't think of committing an adultery cos if you do, the level of trust your wife has for you will decrease.

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hahahaha

this is funny.

i cant still believe that such men exist in this planet earth . if you cant hold on for a while then go and become a rev father that is the best but for it . by the way during your youthful year were you not having it in quatom. don't just endanger the life of that woman by entering that you walking stick inside that hard disk. just wait a while and ask God for direction he will help you . don't think of committing an adultery cos if you do, the level of trust your wife has for you will decrease.

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Adultery'll definitely hurt your marriage

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Guys, you know what. I intend to be enjoying sex till my due date.

My friend did the same and she didn't get a cut or have a tear!

Ooops!! Isn't that wonderful!!!!

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@Angeljoy,

This is the best & most empathetic post of all,thank you so much,

Things are improving a bit & hope I will succeed with all my advances to my dear wife,

No it wasn't doctor's advise,as we go for ante-natal together most times,its just 'hormonal' like somebody put it.

Thank you so ,so much & God bless

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try to hold body is not good enough guy, you are still thinking it which is as good as doing it, its said that ' if we know how powerful our minds are, we would stop thinking any thing negative.' you need to start reading books on pregenancy for young Papas.

and what Camali posted makes alot of sence.

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i am single does count me not experienced but not ignorant , i ve seen books on sex and pregenancy ( sorry can't recall any author names ) but the exist. go to good bookstores or even go online. and get that attitude of 'lost her shape' from your mind. have you told her how beautiful she is of late? if you start and keep saying beautiful things to her, you would be surprised on how things would change, all the best man and congrates before hand, she is carrying a gift for you not a mistake

hi

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Adultery has never helped and wont help u. Don't eat the forbidden fruit.

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@Almondjoy,

I'm happy to inform you its NEVER going to happen again,

I love my wife very much & we went for a scan together dis morning, I actually saw my baby moving !!

I'm going to tell my wife about this 'lack of sucking discretion' much later & will ensure I don't put myself in dis situation again.

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Dis wasn't necessary dear, I forgive you cos I can understand your emotions,

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You're a silly assshole. You knocked up your wife then went off playing around with another woman then have the audacity to ask if you commited adultery. Please just go to hell cos even Jesus will not save you this time. Oloshi.

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no! adultery cannot help u or your marriage.its most likely going to ruin u.pls and pls.

am not going to ask wat kind of man u r, but u do need some scolding.

is this her first baby? if it is, well its definatly not going to be a continuos trend. this woman in ur office or any other woman, do u know wat they have or carry with dem.

biko, no take ur sexual urge take cause katakata for yasef n family.

it will pass. afetr d babay arrives, shagging resumes, then u can talk to her about it. even talk to her wen she is in a confrtable mood.

i no how pregnancy feels. am a mum. so discuss.

am sure no woman wantsto share her husband talk more lose him

a word is enough

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Adultery will/will not help your life. If you are very smart enough you will go after your feeling and an affair and if you are very lucky impregrate the lady, then that will be fun more expenses for your spare money. If you are very smart you will marry two, three or four wives  etc and have the freedom not to impregnate them all at once plus freedom to enjoy life to the full.

But if you are wise enough and want you are a real man, you will face your problem as one reply says, discuss your problem with your wife and not a fake man who run away and hide from problems and challenges.

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Adultery will help your life. If you are very smart enough you will go after your feeling and an affair and if you are very lucky impregrate the lady, then that will be fun more expenses for your spare money. If you are very smart you will marry two, three or four wives etc and have the freedom not to impregnate them all at once plus freedom to enjoy life to the full.

But if you are wise enough and want you are a real man, you will face your problem as one reply says, discuss your problem with your wife and not a fake man who run away and hide from problems and challenges.

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Many thanks my online friends for all the advice & for having fun at my expense.

Somethng happened yesterday evening:

I was working away on my laptop when this my female colleague walked in,I was already concious & quickly asked what she wanted? She pretended to want to show me something on my screen and in the process brushed her self on my shoulder area,I ignored this and she did it again, I had little optio than to brush my face on her bosoms & as if I was been remote controlled, I undid her suit's buttons and removed her bosoms , GEEZ !! suits can hide stuff o ! This lady that I tot was just average was so loaded,probably a 36 DD sef !

I had little option but to suck those things,I sucked like I had not eaten in 5 days , all these while this wicked lady said nothing, I soon realised my office door wasn't locked & quickly regained control of myself & helped her button up.

Have I committed adultery? At least I didn't touch her privates & I'm sure I'll never put myself in such a compromsing situation again,

Father fogive me I know not what i did

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upon all the good words they told you in here, you still went ahead and suck?? eyaa

so sucking was your hunger not banging? why didn't you suck your wife BTW if you were that hungry of sucking/really ready for breastfeeding?

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Jairzinho, does your wife show similar behavior even when she was not pregnant? if the answer is "No" then, that means, she is not really finding something confortable with the pregnancy. so learn to understand the situation of your wife and get use to it, especially when she's pregnant, but if reverse is the case, whereby she does the same behavior all the time. that means, you should call her attention to order and let her know the consequence of her behavior.

please, do not involve yourself into anything that will present you as a bad picture to the poeple around you.

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ol, boy as an adult, and an active shagger,

my advice to you is that you can eat your cake

and have it in this case.

GO SHAG THE GIRL NEXT DOOR BEFOR YOU GO COME GO molest UNDERAGED

IT IS IN THIS KIND OF SITUATION THAT YOU SEE MEN DOING THE UNEXPECTED

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gnite my sisters. nwam u pple make my belle kule on NL.

it is not insane, government people call it policy making.

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good nite virtual friends. i too must go watch mel b win dancing with the stars!

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goodnite omoge,me sef I wan go drink garri with moi moi.

goodnite pals

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most women can survive for long periods without it.

We have other things called hobbies to occupy us.

some of us can chat with friends on the phone for hours and it's just as good or even better.

But men are just something else.

The average man thinks about it constantly.

How to get it

How to do it better

How he's doing it

how he'll do it again

when to do it

who to do it with

where to do it

how to hide dong it

This is insane.

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Your mere existance isnt necessary

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Osanobua!!!

Jerusalem and Jericho

una wan kill me hia

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@ spoilt, that is exactly the point. Dont bother to ask for the jerusalem . . . you are no more just her boyfriend. You have to surround the walls of jericho and blast it down with a joyfull noise!

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The virtuous woman in Proverbs 31 would have put up this post: "My husband wants it every night how do i say make it every 12hrs?"

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NO IT WILL WORSEN YOUR SITUATION.CONTINUE TO ENDURE UNTIL WHEN SHE DELIVERS.

ADULTERY IS BAD IN THE SITE OF GOD AND MAN.

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Lorraine Bobbit for President

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My dear the hot ones are good o but sometimes,you pray he falls unconscious at nightime.

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at that rate, birthing go be every year thing. men sef!!! May the Lord gives me a cool one, amen.

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WOW! There is no other name for "WRONG", it's called WRONG

I swear to God, men like you send women to jail, because u treat dem so bad, they end up killing you. Are u not the one that got her pregnant? Even though u're not a woman, do u think women feel good tru d nine months of pregnancy? You are a disgrace! nmwo u wan tto go and sleep with her, I mean look at the silly question u asked

"Can adultery help my marriage" Yes it can, so go ahead and sleep with someone else, when ur wife ispregnant again, Get out there and go sleep with someone else! It will help ur marriage, infact it willl even make it d best marriage!!

I swer, some men are just not worth living on God's earth, dis crap really pissed me off!

How can adultery help a marriage? God!!!! make I stop sef!

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laughing real hard at almondjoy and nwando.

i heard that is why there are polygamist in nig. if one get belle, go to the other.

Poster, help with shopping for baby. you will forget abt laying.

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women dey suffer o

look at a man on this thread complaining that his 9 month pregnant wife is unchoppable.

go figure

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osisi do igbos have names for twins too?

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my brother I saw that question too.

what type of Q is that.

Can there be marital love without sex?

They go together

like Taiwo and Kehinde

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my sister,I held out for 2 days and I couldn't  hold it any longer.

We all know men like that.Infact some prefer it to the real thing.

This wife needs to get with the program.

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