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I'm Not Comfortable With My Baby's New Job - What Do I Do?

My babe called me two days ago and told me she had been called for an interview for a job as an air hostess for one of these Nigerian Airlines. About 30mins ago she told me she had been contacted by the airline to come for the second interview and subsequently her employment letter. i told her my mind about the job(i'm not in town with her presently), and she just went all moody and unhappy, saying i'm not happy for her.

Left to me I wouldn't have minded, but my fear is that with the recent happenings in the aviation industry and other aspects in the country, i wouldn't want her to be flying around in any unsafe aircraft.

I don't feel comfortable about it at all. Her mom too doesn't like it. Should i hide my fears and let her accept this job or do i tell her not to go for it if she eventually gets it?

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75 answers

@ poster

well do u financially take care of her, because if u do and u can keep her happy then yes u can tell her u dont want her to work. but if u dont, well there is nothing u can do about it.

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this frank person sounds like a psychopath

Reloaded, i totally agree. The guy did not even hint at the phone incident at all but all the ego tripping chauvinist could bring out of the whole story is the fact that she dropped the phone on him. Thank God Say u no be the guy close friend, na una type go poison the guy mind come pour sand sand for them garri.

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A man definitely has to make progress in a case like this, especially if it concerns someone you truely love and have chosen to spend the rest of your life with.

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@Poster!

Good man you are ,imaking progress about the whole thing.

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o boy, Debo's argument just left me slack jawed. I cant believe in this era we no longer have the chance to tell our gfs how we sincerely feel about their own choices. We may as well just be friends.

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D-reloaded, if you don't have anything meaningful to say, could you please refrain from hurling your insults in my general direction?

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Men like you need to be beaten.

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I notice that air hostess in 9ja usually have big bootie.

If ur girl fits the profile then ur fears are mis-directed!

Trust me, her courtesy will be converted to customer servicing.

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paddy look i have the perfect ans to your problem i know the chairman of conductors association in obalende i can talk to him 4 u im really positive he would have an opening for your gf.

look men i have to b frank wit u let the babe be dont push her too mch else u cld loose her just support her

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Air travel is the safest way of travelling but with the exception of naija local airlines tho. Those airplanes are so old

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Thank you all for your responses. I just want to make a few things clear to you all and to those who misquoted some of the statements i made earlier:-

- Some of you were of the opinion that it was a "choose me or your job" kind of situation. Let me tell y'all that i never, ever think that way and i will never impose myself on the girl. It's she who will make the final decision. We had this discussion sometimes last year when we were first going out newly, and i asked her then that what does she feel about being an air hostess. It was she herself that told me she never liked the job, that she wouldn't want to work in this country's aviation industry, etc. Now that she told me she got a job, what i only told her was that i didn't feel too comfortable about it, and that i'll prefer her to be on the ground with me rather that flying around in the Nigerian airspace, but if she feels that she wants to go for it, i'll have to sit back and prayy everything works out well. Everyone knows hw unsafe our airspace is with the level of decay which had occurred in the sector over the years.

- What i meant when i said i "told her my mind" was what i have explained above. I'll never use my selfish interests to spoil her dreams. She asked me for her support and i've told her that when we see (possibly today as i'll be heading back very soon) we'll talk more on the issue and we'll then have a joint issue and conclusion. i'm not that kinda guy who just imposes things onto my girlfriend, even if we were married. I always like to hear everyone's side of issues first. What i intend doing later on today is when we sit down and talk, we'll weigh both ways and whatever comes out will be our final decision. She too told me on phone yesterday morning that she has mixed feelings about the job and she doesn't know whether to accept it or not. Whatever happens, i'll surely give you all the updates.

I hope i've made myself clear. Kapish, everyone?

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God shes trying to better her life.

She nots selling her body or drugs!

No job is safe!

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All due respect but this is completely unrealistic in real life. There is absolutely nothing wrong with telling my gf my mind . . . women pull the "choose me or ur friends" stunt almost all the time . . . so what if the guy said to choose between the relationship and her job?

The guy has legitimate fears that has been echoed by her parents and friends too so what's the big deal here?

Since when did we start having to watch how we speak our minds to our gfs? I'm not for controlling her movement, choices or lifestyle but as long as she's with me she must understand that whatever decisions we both make is no longer about one person's benefit alone but must take into consideration the feelings of the other.

He clearly didnt sayhe laid anything down as the law, that is what certain clueless females here have read into a simple post in order to say the usual crap about independence.

If my gf suddenly decided she wanted to jeopardise our relationship by going off to do missionary work in Afghanistan you bet she's having a piece of my mind AND the law.

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again?

you ppl get wahala jare

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very good points . . . but its easy to give such advice from the vantage position of being the outsider. The guy has every right to be worried . . . unless i'm the only one still stuck in the 18th century no where are men prevented from "expressing their minds" to the women they are seriously dating.

Should the girl also not express reservations if he were making a decision that would ultimately affect them both?

What do you mean by "discussion and rational plan"? From his post the girl is not interested in such at all . . . if my parents were deeply worried about a life choice i'd be taking a second look at it instead of wailing that my boyfriend wasnt supporting me.

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Are you scared of heights or flights of uncertainties?

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That is the fear of any spouse of a airline hostess or pilot.

But lets face it air is still safer then road espically in Nigeria.

Thing is if she really wants this job let her do it and support her.

There are far more dangerous jobs in this world.

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So what do u intend doing with all the boys - " your boys". I hope it's not what I'm thinking,

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you want me to call WinnerGal on you?

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*sigh*

can both of you get back to topic? troublemakers

Seems like am the only peacemaker on NL today. . i feel so left out

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there are several factors that make Nigerian airspace unsafe besides the state of the aircraft.

1. There is no radar coverage outside Lagos and Abuja, most pilots fly blind.

2. Are our airports (sorry cattle sheds) safe? The last time an international airline complained about bird strikes.

3. Do we have facilities to manage disaster? - It takes us weeks to find a large aircraft.

4. There are stories of aircraft taking off into stormy weather simply because the meteorological service failed to warn them of such - the flight that crashed in the village outside of Ogun state is an example.

5. Aircraft are forced to hover in the air for hrs because a VIP is using the only runway.

Bia, if your girlfriend told you she was joining the army and being deployed to Iraq today will you just sit there and "support" her?

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home boy klassguy was a bit ambiguous about what he means by 'I told her my mind' - he could've given an ultimatum, or said he doesn't like the job or what not, but it is truly a dilemma.

Truth be told that there are many accidents in airplanes, but people get killed from riding ordinary okada on the road. . .it may sound fatalistic, but its the truth.

Homeboy even said he is not in town, meaning he likely travels a bit for business or whatever - the roads are as dangerous if not more dangerous than air travel, even in Nigeria.

Finally, I beg to disagree with all the so called 'flying coffin' aspersions being cast - truth be told, the airlines haven't always been the best (some are quite terrible in fact) but after the closure of many of them, the few flying ones are quite reliable and safe according to all recent accounts.

It may not be a comfortable position to take, but in the interim, let her start the job and then you both can reevaluate later and take a joint decision. Don't make it seem like its a 'choose the job or me' situation. A real man will support his woman regardless - she also obviously has a brain and would be concerned for her own life as well.

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yawn. What a predictable bore. I dont reply to posts based on who is doing the posting, i reply to the content of the posts . . . just too bad it happened to be you at the other end . . . i dont think you need to tell me to stay away from you, i wasnt in your path was i?

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Alagolo tell your boy to stay away from me. Please

I think it's funny that him of all people is talking about "charging into threads"

Maybe others have but I ahvent forgotten your numerous bashings of others. Even one girl who just said "I wont accept my husband's surname because I perfer mine" was given a sermon of abuses from this same little boy. Lmao and he wants to lecture me?

The Irony.

My mentioning labs and what not had EVERYTHING to do with this thread as I was making the point that danger exists EVERYWHERE. Even cops are married.

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Grow up, rushing around like a pitbull in a chinashop doth not an independent woman make. I'd be surprised the day you reply to any post without your usual "bloody" this and that. Go see how other women behave and borrow a leaf.

I make mention of stuff when it is pertinent to the thread.

The problem is you make claims about "understanding" when its apparent you dont. The boy said absolutely nothing about "controlling" her. The entire essence of his post is that he is voicing a legitimate concern to his gfs career choice. Even the girl herself confirmed her parents are also not happy with her decision with pertinent reasons.

There is nothing to signify control here. Read first before going on rampage.

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this is the only chance you have to have sex on the plane, wow, never done that before, making love in the air, that will be great.

do it before somebody does it for you you

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Working in a lab in the US and working on aircraft in a country with one of the world's worst airspace are two clearly distinct issues. Whether you work in a lab with HIV is not the concern of this thread.

You still have plenty of learning and growing to do.

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Is that how you were taught to ask questions?

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Is it because they havent YET killed you in SA that you are yarning dust.

I asked you a simple question. Instead of getting defensive and running your mouth, a simple Yes or No would be fine.

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Those of us that work in labs with dieases n ko ? Abegi.

If he can FIND her a better job, let him do so

Until then he should be quiet and let her parents do the whining

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Everyone is saying "support her in her decision" . . . when it comes to serious relationships decisions no longer affect one person but 2.

If i were in klassyguy's shoes i'd object to her working on Nigeria's myriad of flying coffins.

Supporting a woman doesnt always have to involve agreeing to her every needs and wants.

There are better jobs she could go for.

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I was only trying to let him know he doesnt have such a control over her now.

I advise you work on your approach and attitude to people. See all your previous posts on this particular thread. I am sorry for whoever puts you at home.

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See how how naughty you are ! Itz not wot u think.

I was only trying to let him know he doesnt have such a control over her now.

I advise you work on your approach and attitude to people. See all your previous posts on this particular thread. I am sorry for whoever puts you at home.

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Is that how it works in your house?

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I dont think you have the right yet to ask her not to take a particular job.

The reason is that u guys are not married yet and chances are that you can still leave or dump her.

I suggest that you get married first, then you can command her as you like.

Best of luck.

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Boyfriend,my only worry for you is that if she is picking a job at Arik Air. Tell she has no job yet. Their chairman will sack her before she signs her letter of appointment. Arik job is just like not working. They have one mad animal as their chairman. You care for his aka(Point & kill), for his passion for sacking people.

Apart from Arik Air, just pray for her and help her look out for another job fast. Air hostesss job is not a career job for a woman o.

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awon aiye lon le kakiri

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@D-reloaded,Gbe enu re dake!

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This didirin isnt even think of free tickets he can score. shio

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i would not want any of my lovedones to work on an aircraft no matter as what.

But your girlfriend will get to met a lot of people

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@poster,

I feel ur fear,

Why don’t u allow her start with this job first and along the way u can persuade her to still looking for something else on the side.

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