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If It Were You, What Will You Do?

Hi,

If you are fed up with a man's irresponsible character and you want to get out of the relationship and you find out that you are consiously or unconsiously thinking about him even after several months of telling him you dont want the relationship to continue. What do you do, considering that you dont want to go back to him again.

Response before my darling friend and sis. goes KOLOMENTAL.

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18 answers

Na slip of thought sorry of writing,

but it doesnt matter wht is slip wht in asmuch as u get the mesg contribute.

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@post

contradicting statements

thinking of leaving him

and at the same time thinking of him in favored terms

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FIND SOMEONE ELSE TO THINK ABOUT

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Individuals are different, so while it would take some people a week Max. to snap out of a tired relationship, it took a friend of mine two years. Although I initially had sympathy for my friend, she began to get on my nerves after the first year.

Your friend probably has reminders of the guy around her, or she is doing alot of the same old things that she did when the guy was in her life, so it makes sense that she is reminded (as opposed to thinking loving thoughts) about him alot.

She may not be idle, but she certainley needs to change things up a bit. Suggest some new things to do, and new places to see where, hopefully, there will be new people to meet,

A good way to do is this is to ask others what would brighten them up if they were in this position. Then try a few of the suggestions out on your friend.

Peace.

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I would rather go through the pain now, under my own control than later when he breaks my heart with his irresponsible behaviour. It's not easy breaking up with someone you care for, but time apart should make your thoughts clearer, that way you can even identify if he's really worth fighting for.

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You have to be mentally/emotionally ready to leave the relationship

Judging by what you wrote, i don't think you are, maybe you are scared of been alone nor do you want to let go

You know the right thing to do

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Attachment issues or is it detachment.

It's hard to break an habit,reason why people fumble with new year resolutions after a couple of days.

Before i get ahead of myself,why be with someone whom you are obviously fed up with?

A good way to stop thinking of someone who has left a scar,is to refocus your energy on positive thinking.

Get a new wardrobe,pick up a new hobby,call old friends on the phone,learn something new,go back to school,get a new hairstyle,delete the text messages and pictures,meet new people,the list is endless.

My point is-you can do anything if you put your mind to it. Don't stay static!

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Well do you think that the guy is till thinking of you after so much time? Or has he moved on with his life??

Not likely.

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If it were me, I will stick with my decision ie let him go. There is no point talking someone into behaving right in a relationship. A man should by default always respect his woman.

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let him go. it is hard but no one should be big enough to occupy your mind too long

Not when good cash and quality sex are involved,these two things are very rare to come by in this part of the world.

talk things over with him or keep searching till u get a close substitute.

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Seems like u want to go back. . .

U only want sum encouragement, well here it is! If u sure don't want to go back, then I don't see a reason 4 this thread. . .

Go back if u want 2 or forever hold ur

Who said 'U' can't or shouldn't go back? It's ur life so follow ur heart so that only u will enjoy d glory (if it works out) or take d blame (if it fails). . .

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She is thinking of him because she is idle

let her get busy

Let her also get someone else to fill the space

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Oops!! sorry . . .I meant:You have said it all . . .Gbam!!

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let him go. it is hard but no one should be big enough to occupy your mind too long

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Yes it would also be a good idea to talk to him - but i wouldn't stand for it. A man knows when he is not treating a woman right and there should be no need to ask him to behave because he should just do it! If he respects you enough he should anyway. If you really want to make this work then talk to him and tell him he needs to change - if he doesn't do it after you have spoken to him then you really need to end it.

It's a hard situation to be in - when you love someone so much its hard to let go but if he's not treating you right then there is someone out there that will!

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My observation is that she is still very much in lve with the guy.

My advise is that she should call him up and talk to him (a one on one talk) then him she does not like his behaviour and also beg him to change his attitude. She would be surprised that he would listen to her and things would change for the better. Instead of her killing herself emotionally.

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Breaking up is never easy - thats why no one likes to do it. You should break up with him and stick to it and do not change your mind. He will treat you even worse if he knows you will keep coming back to him. It will be hard at first but eventually you will move on and realise that you made the right decision. Everyone deserves to be happy and i wish you the best of luck.

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