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Im In Love With My Step- Brother: What Should I Do?

I recently met my stepbrother (his mom and my dad are married) and we hit it off (not like that o) we became really good friends. Then i started developing all these weird feelings for him, and one night, we took our friendship step further.

Ever since its been going round and round in my mind, because im not sure, if what i did was right or wrong. Im falling in love with him regardless and he feels the same way too, what should i do. Is it wrong to feel the way i do about him?

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159 answers

I dont see anything wrong with it. You guys are not blood related. And dont think your alone in the situation cause honestly im going through the same thing. And my step brother is 3 years younger then me.

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@OP i wont be surprised if u tell me u'r from the yoruba land, cos this is just there normal practice.

HIS MUM MET UR DAD

YOU HAVE MET HIM

AND SO ON AND SO FAULT

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@Sasha, I am in d same thing and i can only tell you to follow your heart. Mine worked for me, i will really want to talk with u. Pls contact me with chizzytom@yahoo.com

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since this was posted years ago i would like to know what happen to this relationship because i'm kind of in the same situation right now. we been together for 5 years now our parents found out and we broke it of few years back but couldn't stay away from each other. our parents got divorced 2 years ago but they have 2 kids together and they don't know if we still together. idk how to tell my mom. i was really surprised to find people in the same situation its a relief. and also CARL 1880 i would like to know what happen with your girlfriend. i live in the US

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Asumin sum1 askd u dat ? Wat wud av bin ur ansa. Girl friend, i wnt deceive dats 1 of doz tins i wil tink as evil n worse,i beg try n clear doz evil tots 4rm ur mind. Lol

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it is a very wrong idea, it does not worth publicity at all. to call a spade a spade, it is very wrong.

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for me, i cannot see anything wrong with it

the only wrong part is the way we africans see it

as an african i would say, for the sake of your parent ad every one else you might have to reconsider

but haven said that, i think we should change certain things in our culture and tradition

every culture and tradition should be subject to reveiw.

we do most of what we do in our culture out of ignorance

if we understand better today, then i think we should make a change

i totally understand her feelings and in my personal opinion, as a liberal, i think she should go on

i do not believe we should do what we do to please others to our own detriment especially if it has got to do with romance

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okay, i know it's been a long time since you posted your question- but i joined this whole nairaland thing just so i could reply because i was so disgusted with how most of the people on the site were treating you. He is your STEP brother. He is not related to you by blood. Your parents met and got married, but YOU GUYS ARE TWO SEPERATE PEOPLE. It is natural. It is normal. It is not Inbreeding. If he was your real brother or half brother then yes, it would be Inbreeding, but a step brother is not a real relation- it is a relationship by marriage, which, by the way, was your parent's choice and not yours. You are both old enough to understand the consequences of your actions and don't let anyone tell you that you're a sinner or whatever. You are guilty only of having the most natural instincts and feelings that a person can have and you are NOT a bad person.

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@Sasha4u.WHY ARE YOU NOT SAYING ANYTHING?we are waiting for you.

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for all i care,the marriage is impossible

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@poster,

Brotherly love okay but anything beyond that should be quenched pronto as that road leads to nothing but disgrace and humiliation.

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[color=#000099][/color] In life there are so many hills to climb upward,and this is just one of them.this thing is very complicated.u c,in societal values,iw may depend on where u come from,in d eyes GOD,it may not b wrong since both of u are not blood related.but in d eyes oe d natural law,it may sound absurd.so pls,to avoid any public ridicule,u beta find someone else.pls.

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@sasha4u.I understand it is allowed in some tribe's,especially in Ghana.is it allowed in your tribe?if no,discard that thought fortwith;the pressure from continueing against the norm(what is acceptable in your tribe)will consume you not him"in Nigeria men get away with adultery,women hardly ever.men get away with Inbreeding,women;when then bubble burst and reality set's in,life become's meaningless.

I can assure you,there are load's of men out there that are more amazing,handsome,caring and deft than him.

I don't mean to scare you;the grim fact,this act where it is not accepted has caused untold damage to many girls.it has destroyed homes,unleashed curse's and struggle's that outlived the core partipant's.

TO STOP THIS,YOU MUST FIRST TELL YOURSELF(NOT HIM)THAT IT IS WRONG, THEN TELL HIM(IF YOUR TRIBE IS AGAINST IT)MAKE CONCIOUS EFFORTS BY LEAVING THAT AREA.

MEN TALK TO WOMEN EVERYDAY,START SEEING ANOTHER MAN FAST AND MAKE REAL EFFORTS TO SHUT HIM OUT.

YOU WILL BE SURPRISED HOW FAST YOU GOT OVER HIM.

You briefed us about"one night,we took our friendship further"TAKE HEED WHY THOU CAN.when many peeps are in love,their mind's no longer reason straight:everything is possible!

You are in love now,these word's pouring out on this thread will seem like or be outright gibberish to you but when that now relative of your's"pounds"you into deep confusion and back,you will be flushed with satisfaction and be forced to reason straight.  

Love make's the heart grow fonder"if a brother start looking at his blood sister or mother"with corner,corner eye's" he will sleep with her,vice versa.these wicked feeligs rear their ugly head's in million's of heart's daily;it is practical self control or seeing it as a taboo that send such feeling's flying out the window!

I DON TALK MY OWN'O.

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You are not only in love you are mad

Both of you need deliverance.

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All dis i feel for u wey some of ena dey say. HE IS HER BROTHER PERIOD!!! They freaking met after their parents got married so why did thier little minds nt see each other as sibblings. In any society its creepy. Nt just naija.

@ poster U r not d first or last 2 fall inlove, so get ya mind of ya BROTHER. To make u feel better. People get heart broken by a patner even after they fell inlove, people get divorced even after falling inlove!!

SO DONT LET THE WORD INLOVE MAKE U Do SOMETHING silly!

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[color=#990000][/color]

Sorry sasha if im late with a response to this issue im new to the

chat thing alot late acctualy and im pretty silly for responding

first of all if your in love with your step-brother its not wrong

definition of sibling [brother/sister] is born of the same parent

you are not, If you grew up to gether that would be different

love has nothing to do with your head follow your heart but before you do annything talk to your pastor i may be wrong,

Think of it this way, What if you knew him before you parents

got married and fell in love would you break up with him just because your parents married.

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what about having sex with your cousin?

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@poster, end the story, its wrong.

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@Ayettymama

U were asking where it was in the bible right!

Right here--Leveticus 18 vs 9

9 " 'Do not have sexual relations with your sister, either your father's daughter or your mother's daughter, whether she was born in the same home or elsewhere.

@OP, drop that thought

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@ carl , you guys really have a family circle going on there, LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOONG THAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAANG

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seriously, your dad is tapping his mom's Bottom, now you want him to be tapping your Bottom and that sounds right to you abi, your brain needs total over-haul and your thoughts need sand-blasting. if you need a guy so bad, i know charity begins at home, not in all cases okay, okunrin yapa ni gboro. okay when u get to church, whose gonna be the parents of the bride and groom, the families of your surname and your surname invites naira landers to the devilish matrimony between their son and daughter, CRAP!,

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Go join "sock" on the tv show called "Reaper" make wuna continue di love wuna step bro-sis

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no i am not Nigerian. I am south African by decent. I was born and raised in USA. My girlfriend/fiance is caucasian. Its been 3 yrs since we contacted our parents. We celebrate everything together holidays, vacations, birthdays. we live together as a married couple.

We both work to support ourselves. Thank god for scholarships that pays for our college tuition.

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come i just registered and i saw your msg,come let me tell you,what you posted is really wrong,kindly seize yourself from these silly demonic act and act right, hamzo

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@Poster,

Personally, I don't see anything wrong in it since you aren't related by blood.

But As An African?. . . .Uhmmmm

God Help You!

If you are outside here, Then GoodLuck to you.

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Are you for real? this is an amazing story. Are you nigerian or maybe an african by any chance (just curious)

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ha-ha . . . . u need counselin my sister . . . !

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@post

wipe d tot of ur love away, cos it will only lead u 2comitting abomination

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I dunno about you guys,

I come a single father and just me home. I had a crush on this girl, as far back as i can remember. when i turned 11 she was 10, i asked her to be my girl. Being innocent kids she agreed, a year later we were having sex in her mom's house.

Now we were 15 & 14, a dreadful day we returned from school went in her bedroom and had sex. Well my mistake was after sex i should have left but fell a sleep, that same evening her mom caught us in her bed, buck Bottom Unclad, a sleep.

OMFG was she mad, she called my dad and asked him to pick me up and told him what had happen. This was the first time my dad even knew i had a girlfriend. he came to her house grabbed me by the ear and got royally pissed off. while i sat in the car he went inside to talk to her mom, to this day i have no clue what was said.

After that day my relationship with this girl was either in school or through her friends taking her to the mall. we would sneak in the mall's restroom and have sex.

Six months had passed like this and one day in the mall i caught my dad and her mom walking around holding hands. I was shocked!!! they didn't see me so i ran back to my girlfriend's and told her what i saw. we never confronted our parents. And let the day, and months pass cause when our parents were out we were together, we were kids we didn't know any better.

I still remember that day my dad took me to my girlfriend's house and after a very very quiet dinner. they told us they were getting married!!!

They never knew that me and my girlfriend were still having sex and were in love. Ohh we argued with our parents but to no avail. we never told them about us though, fear i guess.

Four months later they got married and started living at our house.

Me and my girlfriend/step sister, we stopped having sex, and we both fell in a state of confused depression. we weren't sure how to handle this.

Almost a year had passed and we had finally started being normal around each other, going to school, got new girl friend and she a boy friend.

Ahh!! i remember a fine summer day it was. Sun was shinning, no clouds in the sky, every now and then a cool breeze will follow, birds singing. I was in the pool having a relaxing "float" and my step sister joined me.

We were talking in general about school, boys, girls, friends, etc, then we finally talked about us, what we had what we were doing back then, during this she would say something pause look at me i would say something pause and look at her. We got real uncomfortable, she jumped of her float and ran back in the den saying that she had to go to the bathroom. she had no idea i followed her. I told her that we should talk about it so that we aren't so uncomfortable alone around each other, then she turned around and told me that she still thinks about us, she misses the intimacy we shared and she still loves me.

During my shocked stare she reached over and kissed me, i had many many many emotions running through me, but what conquered all was the feeling of relieve and i just grabbed her and kissed her like finding a long lost love returned. we had sex in the den and it was good, really good. manly cause we took our time in having sex not rush it. we had sex all through high school.

we both got accepted into the same college far away from our home. we both live together and love each other. we have talked about marriage, kids, a family.

we both have coped with our situation by saying that our parents were selfish in not considering that the first time they met we were caught having sex.

So by your def. we don't care if people call us Inbreeding or whatever, we are not blood related, never have been.

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hello sis,

i guess its been said already, as it stands now, you have to get the thought off your head and see him as a blood brother or relative, you are both related now, thank God you now know he is your step brother.

take care.

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Poster, may God save your soul

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Sasha Sasha hear the voice of wisdom its wrong becos the more u harbour the thought that u love him then u grow a little step further and that leads to variants of issues,i do believe in one thing do wat is right without ur heart drifting my dear if at any point in time u thought that its wrong for u to be in love with ur step brother then that makes it wrong becos ur psyche(spirit) doesnt agree

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i rather not say for now, beacuse i know people will jump down my throat whatever i say, However i will say one thing: all will be revealed in blog, so if u wana kno the full story, il get u the link as soon as i start. (if i ever do, lol, laziness!!)

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not a good look it cant even work out anyway im sure ur dad would kill someone if he heard about this

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@poster

Pls, why in the world do some pple walk past their delicious breakfast straight

in the trash cans to feed? How would you respond to a lady asking YOU if sleeping

with her step father was right?

Pls pls pls pls. You have to stop this. You know this is terribly wrong, that's why

you came here. and the recompense of this is coming your way pretty soon.

Boy! THIS IS THE WORST THING I'VE HEARD THIS YEAR!!!

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well said, really i dnt have anything to add to that! u got it in one, im really starting to wonder,

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I don't know how old both of you are. It would really say a lot. We sometimes don't choose who we fall for. It just happens. But there's something willful and very knowing about you and your post. If you go into this it's because you want to. Your parents are married. You might want to set aside your infatuation and think about the long-term consequences of this. You're related by marriage, but not by blood, so I don't think it's Inbreeding. But it's disturbing that, given that the world is full of wonderful men, you had to choose this one. And you did choose this. We've all had crushes on cool  cousins and other relatives. But that doesn't mean we follow through on those feelings and encourage them,like you did. With time, those feelings pass. And how would your parents feel about it anyways? Will it damage their relationship with you and with each other? Weigh the consequences. If you decide gratifying your infatuation- and it's very powerful, that- is worth risking anything for, go right ahead.

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if u neva sleep wit am, d thing wey we dey tell u na say make u stop dis crazy falling in love of a thin g before e go metamorphosize into d onewey u go start dey sleep wit each oda. wetin no good no get anoda name apart from say e no good.

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well first of all thanks for the responses, really appreciate them, some even made laugh, anyway im still comtemplating u see. but i guess since this topic has caused such outrage im not about to jump into anything. and just to clear things up, we have not slept together, it's not even on my mind but that's another story, infact im thinking about bloggin on it, anyway keep your responses coming,

regards

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well, my view might be different from all in the house but , i'm sorry to say that i known that our former neighbour had one beautiful daughter before she married her last late husband, and the man's son is presently mairried to the woman's daughter even though the woman still had three kids with the man.

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Looking at the meaning of step-brother,he is not your step-brother but you since your parents are married,you can call your self that.There is not wrong in falling in love with him ,since you are not related by blood,it is not Inbreeding,you can go on with your relationship.

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I don't think its a spiritual thing.

You should visit a shrink and take your half brother with you.

Even if he was born in a previous marriage,the fact that you are related by marriage should severe all carnal feelings for him.

You're not even supposed to think of the possibility of a relationship with him.

I had cousins who were having an affair at one,they even slept with each other on vary many occassions, they had to stop when they realised that it would lead them nowhere.

the lady is married now with kids.

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Girl, u just have to cut off this feelings of your and go look for your self another, that relationship will not put forth anything good. Lets be realistic here honey. Am a comeroonian.

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what alot of people do not understand here is that we can fall in love with anyone including our fathers and brothers. all we have to do is to control our feeling and don't allow our feelings to control us. afterall, this are people that weren't brought up together. baby girl, all the advice above are right but the approaches were wrong. you have to cut it off, its got to stop now. god help you

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*** humming 2pacs [b]scandalous [/b]in his head****

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I think the topic suppose to be

I' like My Step- Brother: What Should I Do?

instead

I'm In Love With My Step- Brother: What Should I Do?

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Forget it

There is not like love

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