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Is It Just Me?

Is it just me or do other females have this problem:

My male friends, brothers, uncles are always calling me cuz the crazy women they meet dont understand that if dude has not returned your last 50 voice mail messages he is not interested in you anymore. That there is nothing you can offer him in the voicemail to make him come over. There are no emergencies that you can have that will make him come see you.

If you call 50 times a day, all times of day and he never picks your calls HE IS NEVER GOING TO PICK THEM!!!

And if it gets so bad that i have to call to tell you to stop calling his phone, why you gonna get mad at me. I am not nasty about. I just call and say something like:

Look i dont mean to distrub you but Chemo asked that you not call him anymore. I am not sure why he has not conveyed this to you or why you have not figured this out but please delete his number and stop calling and texting him.

Why does the female then want to call more?

I have even offered them self-esteem classes and help with finding other men but noooooooooooooo they just want to keep calling? They want to call me all kinds of bitches and tell me how little thier dciks are and how they dont even like them. Well then this call should be easy for you. If you dont like then stop fcking calling them.

Where do yall dudes meet these crazy women?

Hint to the ladies: If another woman calls you to tell you stop calling someone just say thank you and delete his number, evaluate what made you keep calling him and showing desperation, learn from it and keep it moving.

Dont shoot the messenger.

Ok done venting!!!!!!

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83 answers

me thinks english is not ur strong point, he is booked now and he says u are suppose to see him, take ur meds, me thinks it will help u alot

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sometimes we(ladies) don't find time to realise the true worth of being a woman

if  you call a guy 3 times without responding, then move on you will find a better one.

guys don't deserve such regards.

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jennikadri

you v made ur point and I understand. well just watch it soon in the future, u r going to be doing the same thing for a man, u will be doing that not for the man's sake ( ie coward) but for the ladies sake because u will be so pissed that a girl has gone this low in her need of a man.

mark my words,

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sorry then,men r cowards

saving which gurls?shes helping out her male friends,wtout the guys telling her will she know wat to do,shes doing it for them cos they helped her b4its more like an appreciation profession

its obvious,no denying

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exactly.  I am last resort.  They have tried to tell the girl they dont want them anymore.  They have not picked her calls or spoken to her in weeks.

sometimes/most times i am just what the sista needs to snap back to reality.

I would rather do it for them then to have thier new girl subjected to the lies that jaded women tell.

Think about it like this.

You have some guy that you stopped seeing for whatever reason, and he keeps calling do you really want your new man to answer that call and hear whatever foolishness he is spitting in his ear or would you rather your brother or best friend answer the call and just let the dude know "jenni has left the building and wont be coming back"  then he can spit whatever lies he wants to spit and it does not effect your current relationship.

No need to involve the new girl in this hot mess.  No need to taint her mind before they have had a chance to make it work.  Let them be, let them build.  it takes all of 5 mins at most to get rid of a stalker.

I have been there, I know these dudes.  They really try to get rid of these women.  Some just dont understand.

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A man would use anything to get a stalker off his back.

Mind you, it's not like Sistawoman does this as a profession.

She is only saving the gurls from embarrassing womanhood in general.

It's just the way i would advise a man to cowboy the feck up if he's sucking up to a woman like a wuss.

I would be pissed at any woman who allows men to use her as a door mat too(If i were a woman).

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who u be ?oh new bie

did she say it was a one night stand?

is a married man supposed to have a babe outside in d  first place?as usual direct it back to women

shoould a married man use his fellows mans wife as an escape root to chase them girls off his life?

is a man supposed to use a married woman to wipe off d dust off his shoes?

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while I definitely agree with this,

female friends of the dude in question shouldnt be doing their dirty work when infact the dude is tired of girl./ Let him do his crap himself

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Jenny. . . . . .some gurls are outrageous.

The deal was a "one night stand" initially but after tasting the magic stick, they still wanna loiter around.

These days, some girls tell men they are ready to play the 2nd fiddle. . . . .

For instance, look at em gurls dating married men. . . . Are u saying they expect the married man to kick his wife out and marry them??

Pleassssssssssssssssssssssssse!!!

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what are saying! i dont understand?

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its better to talk it out and make it clear

d girls might be getting d wrong signals,yea

she might be thinking " maybe there is sthg  wrong,maybe sthg is bothering him" don't blame then ,because its not easy to accept the fact that one dude that professed all d love for them d previous night,wants to call it quit

d man has to explain,and explain and keep explaining,sm girls r useless but please u men should not use a married woman aás a weapon i beg u

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21st century women have lost their self pride, sense of dignity-worth, lazy to even take up their own responsibilities; of their weakness and stuff. Failing to recognize there's always a strength on the inside to move on when the world 'seems' to be against her (maybe because one guy stopped calling or refused to pick up her calls). What does she do? She cries herself out and resents anyone who doesn't pity her (thats ok) but refuses to move on cos she finds consolation in her self pity. A waste of time and energy I'd say.

A guy isn't giving u the attention u think u deserve is a clear indication that there's a problem and maybe the guy isn't man enuf to say it. But there's already a writing on the wall that our 'educated' sisters couldn't or wouldn't read. . "I DON"T WANT U" everyone around would read but she stays blind to it.

I have seen guys treat women like a piece of rubbish and I could say I know how they reason. Women, ladies, young girls need to wake up and get out of their identity crisis. Wake up and face that odd knowing who u are. If a relationship gets sour, it only shows that something better awaits plus an experience is gained. Don't put all ur weight on a man when u can carry urself. Its scary cos the guy has got a lot to carry too. If he loves u, yes, he'd do anything for u. meanwhile, uve got to be strong for U.

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karma my own anger is ,,,,,,,,,,,,sistawomn was nt there wen they met d babes oooo,after d foolish men have finished using them babes,they will run to her like jelly fish for help

hannibal dis men do it all d time,its not 1nce,2wice but always,if they cant handle the situation then let them lock up their kini haba

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using gf, sister, friend, brother, blah blah to tell off a dude is classless especially if it's a dude that is hiding behind the opther person's skirt. Like sista's friends

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smtimes its better to use ur girfriend,especially wen d stalker is caling u and shes around,its as simple as " honeyanswer dis call for me" but they wont,they dont want the babes to knw dat theyve been cheating their their backs

its not classless,but a man dat cant tell a girl outrightly dat" im not interested is not a man

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@hannibal

i blive men that can't tell their women off,r not men,really

y r this men not using their girlfriends,ofcourse they r scared ,they don't want the girls to know that they r deceitful bastards

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switsoman or whatever,

get off the crackpipe. You really wanna compare a brother doing such for a sister to a GIERL doing this for a man?

More often than not, is it NOT the men who go and chat up these women? how often is it the other way around? It makes sense for a dude to help his sister from "stalkers" cos well he's THE DUDE. Man's world, all that rubbish abi?

But for a dude to allow a woman to do such on his behalf? Might as well give him some pantyhoses and a skirt to wear.

Point is these dudes are cowards and sistawoman should let them man up and do their own work.

If say true Naija woman was the type she called yarning dust to, I assure you she'd be at Sabo right now rolling on the floor

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Are u aware some men cannot handle stuffs like that??

I don't think i can look into the eyes of any woman and tell her to FECK OFF.

The best way to do it is through ma actions. . . . .Not picking up her calls, avoiding her and making meself scarce.

If she does not grab all that, then she needs HELP.

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men do thesame too and it cn even be worse with them. they wld strt threatening and  swearing for u. hmm .  .  .  . when i get such calls, i dnt go cryin to my bro. i handle the situation as best as i can.

pick the fone and  lay it on the table. let the lady talk to the table all she wants. Its a good sounding board or simply put the fone on silent.

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@ Jenni,

What we are saying here is some gurls still continue to call even after u tell them to stop calling!!!

I have been a victim, i had to change my number!!!

She just couldn't see the EXIT SIGN even after she was shown the door.

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and to the babes ITS NO LONGER ACTION SPEAKS LOUDER THAN WORD. its that words are louder than action, thank god there will be heart breaks. and a sister somehow understands that the way babes understand it and want to help amplify the mans action.

ciao I m gone on this tread

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the fact that i do not agree wt u,does not mean u will go peronal on me,smtimes u claim to be right,but don't forget that u might be wrong too

sorry but i have to ignore u

@sistawoman

u have a family,u have kids,let their girfriends do it for them,and leave u to ur family

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Jenny,

I keep saying they have tried to tell the girls to stop calling.  They have tried to let them know they dont want to deal with them.  i am last resort, honestly.

They dont let thier new lover answer because the old girl might say something to the new girl that the new girl should not be hearing.  Whereas with me i pick the call pretend to be the new girl and they tell me everything they think will make me dump the guy not realizing they are talking to his sis or friend.

You know how jaded women can be.

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think of it, if pple can heal themselves then no one needs a doc to intervene.

ok accepted its said no where on this tread that the men didnt call but tell youself the truth, if you are the girl will you listen when he calls to tell you that?

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why wont the men call the girls and talk to them,or better still whenever d girls call,let their lovers answer the call

why will i want to stick my nose into some other girls stupidity?

why r d men shying away and running to a woman for help?

i understand u,but u also have to put my own posts into consideration here sista,im a nigerian,i known how dangerous nigerians can be,i really do

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Jenny,

Why would want a fellow woman to suffer the humiliation of calling and calling and begging and begging?

Would you not want to ease that sistas mind and snap her back to reality?

Would you want your child or yourself to be calling and calling and begging some dude to love you back?

Or would you rather have someone snap you back? my call is kinda like that big sis that grabs you by the shoulders and shakes you?

Do you not understand the things these dudes are saying about these women?

Maybe it is because you have not been on the otherside. I have, trust me they are not kind to these women.

Nothing, nothing can beat the blood of Christ.

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i view it like dis,its more like a fellow sis not minding her business

u see,if a woman makes a mistake so be it

dont blame women for falling inlove,sm fall inlove blindly hence d withdrawal from men

but i will really be d last person to come save dat mans Bottom

i have a daughter,i am a woman, i wouldnt want smone to do dat to my daughter,i wouldnt want smone to do it to me too

we all have feelings,but the fact dat sm fall inlove at d wrong time,does not give a fellow woman like them the right to act superior

shes talking about ghetto?whos talking about ghetto

we r talking about the spiritual,let her go to nigeria and hear of stories of how a woman made her fellow woman mad,or how d entire family was wiped off d surface of dis earth

so wat is ghetto fight?wat is i grew up in d ghetto?dats rubbish

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jennikadri own up something else is biting you on this tread. you sound like someone that dont see anything good with men and yet you cant do without them.

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Cheese n Rice!!!!

I don't wanna offend you. . . . . .Can't let u beat ma Bottom silly.

Back to the topic, i understand where u coming from perfectly.

Some women can be leeches and would never admit show's over.

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do you mean i should ask for forgiveness because i have had more than one sexual partner in my life?

Pleaseeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

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have u asked God to forgive u ?really sleeping wt a couple of men ,is way out of it,really sis ,it is

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@switosman

u really dont get my point do u?

from the initial stage i made it clear dat she should not try dis wt a crazy nigerian,if not ,she will live to regret the day she tried it

yes women suffocate men,but r u men so weak ,and cowardly insensitive not to handle d situation u brought upon urselves?

wat is ur point?

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its a pity this tread had gone off track, 99% of them are missing the point or are plain silly. I do have my stories and from a realistic point of view I support sistawoman.

This was about to happen to my younger sis way back then and God in his infinite grace made the silly dude to let me in early and the most happy that my sis didnt make a fool of her self. image,

I grew up in a family of 3 boys and a sis, she is the last or rather twin with the last guy. there is bond she has with her twin bros and my younger bros has an independent spirit that scares everybody in the house.

onetime my younger bros got himself an  alliance with one older fellow and start spending time at his house and not long my little sis start to go to this fellows house to look for her twin bros, but before thing got on this older fellow called me and start telling fabo; how he is in love with my sis and will like to marry her,  you know all those bull poo guys do. well trust me I didnt object only told him if its gods will it will come to past. on leaving I told myself, i don't have any biz with this nigger its my sis i v biz with. O n getting home I call her and quietly ask her to give me the gist about this dude but she was not forth coming, i didnt beat her or anything of such.

I just  went on talking to her about mens trick and as I was talking she got intrested and I asked her one simple question" can you tell the diff between the good guy and the bad guy that just wants to get you down and he gets going" honestly she don't and I went on to tell her the qualities to look out for, the tell tale signs and all that.

to cut the story short. My sis is married to a fine guy and she married a virgin with her personality intact and esteem strong and over flowing.

@jennikadri

most times you babes just suffocate the guy with your acllaimed love. don't you know love without space is death do you want to kill the dude. think twice.

show some self esteem and see how the guy will love you for that.

this the reason guys say ladies don't think. learn to think and teach the process to all the little ones arround you and see the diff it will make. i pray to marry a thinking woman because they make a better mothers.

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That comes from being around all those boys growing up. My brothers and all of thier friends would always challenge me. We were always around the house slap boxing.

Plus my bros would never let me back down from a fight, be it boy or girl. If i did not whip thier azzes then i would have to come in the house and get my azz beat from my bros.

I slap box with my kids now. poo my daughter is one rough sister. She body slammed one of the boys in the neighborhood for breaking a nail. and dont really piss her off and she will pull out her Capoeira skills and tear someone up.

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I fecking love your attitude. . . . . .Knocking grown Bottom men out!!!

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so was I.

If my post helps to enlighten one female then my job is done. Just head the warning signs, understand what they are saying about you to their boys, and keep it moving. If you have exhibited this behavior in the past and you see yourself in my posts then acknowledge that and make the corrective behaviors. Then you too shall not get a call from another female telling you to back off.

Just a little bit of self respect and pride will go along way.

Any Nigerian babe that wants to step to the likes of me can do so. I am a woman, a good one that but please dont get my mild manner azz on this forum twisted. I am from the ghetto and will pull that poo out anytime my back is against the wall. I have knocked a couple of grown azz men the Bleep out.

Ya heard!!!!!!!

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I was just being sarcastic.

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seriously dont try this wt a nigerian again,cos even the blood of JESUS will not save you,rather it wil deny you

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@sistawoman

spare us d details

1.brothers? i tot u guys were only two in ur family?2 girls?

2.stalkers?they were there to take d stalkers off ur back,now let me ask u on e question

did u sleep wt those stalkers?yes or no? 

no i guess if I'm told to answer,so when they r taking them off ur back then it is manageable

but this men I'm very sure have slept wt this women,n because they r tired and have seen everything,they run to u for help?

u are d one doing d phone calls,calling the girls and telling them that the guys aint interested again,after d guys have bleeped them ,yea let me use that word Bleep?

so what r u saying,is it not better to get a stalker who has no sexual relations wt one off ones back,than getting a stalker whos had sex relations with them off their backs?

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It appears that people fail to look at this so here it is again:

Fair exchange aint no robbery.

My brothers, uncles, male friends were always there to help me with my stalkers.  

They have on several occasions told the girls to stop calling, get a life-one w/o them.  Leave them alone.  I don’t want to be bothered with you.  Pick up and hang up your calls.  Don’t answer them.

I am not first the resort but last resort to getting rid of the stalker girls.  Same thing with them they were my last resort to get rid of the dudes.

My training was received from my brother, uncles, and male friends.  My mother either did not process the skills or did want to pass them to me, I don’t know which.  But I do know that my daughter will have the skills.  It is very simple really.  If you call a dude twice and he does not return your voicemails.  Stop calling.  My sons I am sure will school her like my brothers schooled me.  She is also a tom boy, like her mama, but also a girly, girly girl, unlike her mama.  So she will run wit the boys and be plugged in.

I cant make her do it.  I cant make the training stick, all I can do is give it to her and hope that it gets thru.  Trust me i wont be running to Nairaland about handling any wayward children.  I have brothers, uncles, male friends and a hubby to help wit dat.  All i can do is do what i am doing not to install fear in her and make her want to make the right decisons, with my guidance.  No one can predict the future or what thier children will do or become, all i can do is parent in the best way i know how and so far my parenting has made my children the brightest most well behaved children out there.  We have our chanllanges but they are met with love and respect and corrective training.

Sorry maybe because my game has been so tight that I have never been w/o a man, unless I wanted to, that I have never been pressed over anyone.  There is always someone waiting to take the next mans place.  Just like for men there is always another woman looking to take her place.

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AMEN sweetie,no evil will se u and ur family,Amen

but don't forget that ,u r d one bringing evil to yourself,engaging yourself in things that has no business with u

God only fights for those ,whose hands are clean and have done nothing wrong

but don't expect God to save u when u engage urself in things that hurt people

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I see everyone failed to read the part where i said;

Fair exchange aint no robbery.

Also where i said;

These same male friends and family members have been there on more than one occasion to get the crazy dudes off my case.

Additionally as for my baby girl, she will have the same training I did, and I never embarrassed myself by being that crazy, stalking, cant stop calling girl. I have never ever done it. And I will train her to never ever do it.

Heart break is something i cant stop, but making a fool of yourself is something i can give her the tools to avoid. No matter how much you love a man you should never loose your self respect.

And what the hell does me being married have to do with me coming to the defence of family and friends who have been there for me and will always be there for me. Do i stop being a friend, sister, aunt, cousin, niece when i get married?

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I stopped taking calls that come up on my phone displaying the word "International" cos of girls calling from naija who i dont know from Adam!

They get my numbers from my cousins especially but then they bug me to death with professional flashing. Now i just keep it on silent at nights and have myself a nice sleep, IF ITS IMPORTANT LEAVE A VOICEMAIL!!

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Sistawoman,

I think you are just drinking Panadol on another person's headache.

Where u there when he was enjoying the babe?

Now it turns out he doesn't want him again and you become the go between?

Let him sort out what he started.

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sisterwoman

ok, i understand u . But what i don't get is that they exchanged numbers wit these girls. They atlst shld hv the courtsey to pick or let the girls know they don't want them calling because they hv somehow decided they are not worth their time.

Its their mess, they shld clean it up themselves.

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