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Is it right to check your partner's phone?

The introduction of mobile phones in Nigeria is both a blessing and the source of quarrel amongst couples. Most of my married friends tell me that their wives occassionally pick up their handset, start going through the stored numbers and asking irritating questions, as well as reading their received/sent SMS and jumping to the wrong conclusion, this has caused serious quarrels in several homes.

Now my question to you all (men & women) is it right to infringe on your partner's privacy in the name of "LOVE"

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67 answers

What stops ur partner from checking the fone? It seems that's the only thing both of u hav in common. Well, in d real sense, i don't think there is nothing there to worry about cos u already called the person "YOUR PARTNER"

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It is very wrong , i dont do that to her and in return she should reciprocate by doing same.

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i think that answers the question.

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Not right, it only happens where there's a distinct lack of trust

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Yeah, i can check his HP anytime anyday, but he can't check mine, cos d security in my phone is very tight & he is not permitted/allowed to check(d caller i.d., touch and/or answer (any) call(s) on my HP by me.

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To me checking your partners sms will only get you more annoyed expecially if your partner is the sexy type.

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Yes, it's right. I do check mine anytime anywhere, and she does same. There's nothing wrong abt it.

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Yeah. In fact it is a necessity.

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To me, one part of a criminal is that you udse/take/look at something which does not belong to you without the owner's conscent. Or maybe you give out information about the owner without the owners conscent. to me, thats plain rude , dispicable behaviour and also its just bad.

so. . . you take your partner's HP without his/her conscent and to check on it or even to just play a game on the phone is considered to be a criminal to me. sorry, no offense.

My mom always checks on my father's HP and I hate it very much when she does that. same goes for my sister checking her husbands HP and my brother checking on his fiance phones are all just plain bad. . . i have been arguing with them over this matter for years now. . . thats the reason why all of them always ends up fighting and fighting because of this.

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NEVER EVER CVHECK ANY OF YOUR PARTNER''S TUFF AND I WOULD EXPECT HIM TO DO THE SAME THING FOR ME. ITS JUST PLAIN RUDE. There are many times my partner's HP is at my side and when it rings, I would just pass it to him without even looking at the screen seeing who is the one calling. . . Am not bothered seriousky. Thats his business, not mine.

But he always tells me who is he talking on the phone after that even though I dont want to know. . .

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if you have nothing to hide, you wouldn't bother who checked your phone, lol

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well i have always maintained

d idea of checkin ur babes fone o

do u knw hw many ppl have been saved

frm gettin d virus wen de catch their spouses

cheatin on dem or slipin abt, wit oda men

do u knw hw many diseases they hav escaped

mak una de ther de talk abt trust, nonsense!

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There's nothing bad about checking or looking @ ur friends phone. The way u check it determines how ur partner would accept that checking habbit. With experience, reacting violently because u lack understanding would prevent ur partner from keeping the phone handy for u to check, because that would go a long way to prevent the arguements,unnecessary tension etc it may result to.

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Why not if u both have nothing to hid, their is no big deal in it, except u get skeleton for ur cupboard o.

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I believe its better to know that to imagine. I think you shouldn't even check your partners phone secretly. Let them know you want to know who's taking interest in them. I and my girlfriend, we used to check each others text messages and stuff till it got to a point that she'd even show me by herself.

Sometimes though, she may want to keep secrets. Thats when some 007 skills come in handy.

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Go ahead and check there's a reason why you want to do it. When you do go checking be prepared for what you are about to find out. What you don't know won't hurt you also what you do know will hurt you.

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@Siena Good point. thats why i neva mentioned anything about being sneaky, thats outright bad!

I insist that trusting someone includes trusting them to trust you!

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Private? you've gotta be kiddin. Do you have an official, responsibility-defined relationship with your wife? If there's complete intimacy and trust, why not go through my phone? I've nothing to hide. Besides, i feel its my wife's right to ask questions if i get funny messages (or send them), that shd also help keep my head in check.

I'm not married but my fiance goes thru my phone at will and there's no biggie wit that, there are even times she uses my phone for days. Abeg, i no dey hide anything so no grammar about privacy and all that stuff

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I dont want any boyfriend checking my phone, if and whenever i get married, my husband is 100% free to check or browse thru my phone but definetly not a boyfriend. I no wan check anybody phone, make nobody check my own too, period!!!

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If you dont wanna see what u arent supposed to see, then i would say stay far away from their fones as possible.

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Not just the phone o! Check the e-mails, letters, dress pockets, wallets, the car, smell their dresses for strange perfumes, lipstick or Fluid stains, (for god sakes get cheaters P.I's to follow them about.

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It depends if you suspect the guy/woman is up to no good.

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Na wetin eyes dey find e dey see says one proverb razor fit cut your eyes, B cAREfuLLL,

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My friend feels the same way. The first and only time i checked without asking wasnt found funny.

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Na wetin your eye dey find na him e go see.

Be prepared for the unexpected if you go snooping around, let sleeping dogs lie!

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I sincerely think that wen you check ur patner phones you will get more than wat u bargined for.also trust will only enable you to be think he doesnt cheat cos you dont want to be disappionted wen u catch him at it so i think trust is ok but lets not get it confused .

my opionion

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it's not right,it's means u dont love he or she or

u dont trust the person

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it's not right,it's means u dont love he or she or

u dont trust the person

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I am telling you sweetheart, ur stuff is your stuff like mine is mine. I will not cross the line. I nor wan vex... U know the saying, see no evil, hear no eveil.... anoda one goes like this.. Wat the eyes does not see or the ears hear, the heart does not grieve about

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No, dont do it!!

I would not check her fone, email or anything. I will not even asnwer her calls.

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yes it is right to check your parter phone depending on kind of woman you are going out with

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Well, i dont go through my hubbys phone cause i dont trust him. when we're bored sometimes we naturally just start scrolling our phone,its something everyone does, sometimes when am tired of scrolling mine, i do my partners. its not like am CHECKING his phone per say. If i come across something,i believe i have the rite to ask. If in traffic my husband gets a text, the logical thing is for me to read it out to him. I just believe its no big deal. My friend was upset with me once cause she called my phone and my husband answered, she said I shouldnt allow it. But Ive got nothing to hide,why shouldnt he? I mean the phone was closer to him when it rang and he didnt want it to be a missed call.

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no cuz it just shows a lack of trust n a feeling of insecurity

dis could b very dangerous 4 da marriage

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Why wouldn't I allow her to check my phone when I've gat nothing to hide? It's all about openness and trust. I see nothing wrong in it.

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There is not bad about looking into my partners afair becuase l believe we are one, if l look into his afair is as well as looking into my afair. what concerns him concerns me.

Although some people does it at of jealousy to make sure that their partner don't have afair outside.

To me if l check my partner's what ever l'm only keping our thing inoder.

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its no big deal,infact, i just replied my husband's e-mail( box) for him because ive got his password. i check his phone all da time because i want to know wats up. if u say u don't want to check because u trust your spouse, like seun said, trust will not stop your spouse from cheating. my spouse has never cheated on me and i pray God grants him da grace to never cheat................and wats this about been nosy? dats what marriage is all about,getting into one anothers noses!!!

AND GALS,STOP E-FIGHTING!!!!

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Ohhh.... okay keep posting my dear.

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okay lady.. u don't have to get used to it.. Drop it now?? let it go.. drop it... just let it go.

So... ermm.. is it nice to check ur patners cell phone??

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or should i say BEIGN OFFENDED BY THE WORD?

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Not everyone like using the word

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u like using the word fuxk?, well good for you, it would be really nice to use it somewhere else tho.

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it's your opinion, hot angel, put pls can you kindly stop swearin?, I am askign you very nicely. I know it's not to me, it's just not right to swear, it's rude, other people read the posts you know, it's offensive. mind you, I asked VERY NICELY.

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talking about password to email.... hell no i aint gon give no boy my email password. I could give him the one i know i don't use. But.. my main one?? hell NO!

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Erm , don't you think it's being a bit TOO NOSY?, although my bf lets me check his phone, cos he trusts me n I him, there's nothing for him to hide.

I've even got the password to his e mail, so U see what I mean, if u guys trust each other, then why not?

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A while ago I would have said yes but now I'll say no. I did this a while back and it caused so much strife in my relationship and the moment you feel like you should be snooping around,  you should sit your partner down and talk to them. In retrospect, i wish i had done that instead of snooping; i feel like it would have gone down better... so my advice if you feel like you need to be checking your partner's phone, computer or anything its time you had a heart to heart with him/her.

monister

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There are so many reasons why one would not like his or her spouse looking or checking the others phone, For guys sometimes its a control thing , or insecurity on one or both sides or maybe having something to hide, to me it boils down to the individual if you think you can take it and you have no reason to hold your pahone from being picked or checked anytome then please let your phone be checked and you check your partners phone too but if you know you have alot to hide dude-babe you had betterr fight like a tiger and insist right from the begining that each persons phone is very private and make sure that the rule is enforced.

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What God has joined together let even GSM put asunder.

There is nothing bad about checking your lover's handset since you are one you shold do things in unity and even use the phone together.

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so seun, saying that if your partner knows you're periodically checking up on him/her, maybe he/she will be discouraged from cheating on you doesnt follow at all... if or one enjoy reading my own texts over & over again, so i see no reason why i cant read my boyfriend's own.............if he's cheating & i catch him via texts, 2bad, the relationship will become history

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I generally like to toy with people's phone, just checking out its features, yes even reading text messages provided I'm permitted, especially if it's one i have not explored and my partner's is no exception.

There aint no big deal there for crying out loud! using the word 'check' suggests that you are suspicious.

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