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Should I Give My First Love A Second Chance?

We were lovers during my secondary school days and he was my first love, we lost contact after secondary school. He was seriously commited then and I loved him so much.

After two years he got my address and mobile number through a friend, but i'm in love with another guy that loves me a lot. I have promised my first love that i will never say goodbye. He is so serious and need me back in his life. I told him that i'm into another relationship but said he didn't want to know. I respect the feeling of my first love alot and realise i'm still in love in love with him, but we've never had sex and i didn't want it to happen. I can't double date. What do i do?

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36 answers

@segaciou

Baby, what would you know about love?? You are only 19 for christ sake !!!

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@hot chic

i second that

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I think its beta u move on with d new guy,its a fact u cant luv 2 guys 2gether @ d same tym and besides dis ur so called first love is somone u av lost contact with and u dont knw wots up wit him now.

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noooo, he's the past and that's why they're called exes, move on gurl!

and don't get carried away!

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You need to give him a chance again

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just follow your heart it will tell you what to do

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beyonce,

I imagine how it will be like.

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Going back to your old love  actually balances your heart's true feelings, feeling so much needed, appreciated, most especially that natural attachment, where u can freely express yourself, without acting up of being so exposed or such an adult  stage if u now what I mean ?   but ,,, it can be so so fragile, a offence which others may see as minor or normal may be so hurtful, but when it's sweet u 'll be in the clouds , uhm love is so so fragile.

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I need to know of people going into relationship with old love ,how is it like?

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Noble danie,

You really made a point.

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Sagacious,

This issue is a very sensitive one and u must not toil with it. u also have to be real cos as a secondary school student u may not know what you were doing and secondly relationships are meant to be defined. the problem many relationship face is the issue of definition. Many people don't define their relationship thus they fall into problems.

Relationship grows from a level to another thus u must know what u are doing. My dear put your heart together and be real don't allow anyone to make wrong decision for u.

Pray to God to guide you and don't joke with it cos I don't want you to get hurt.

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@beyonce,mature talk as how?is better she think twice and follow her heart ,if she will try the second guy again she should never say goodbye.

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do what your heart tells you to do, but remember, do not hurt any of them

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the reason why I love Nairaland is that there are so many Special Advisers on Love Related Issues.

If I were to say 3 thns, I'll say think hard, make a choice. Use your head and your heart.

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Sagacious,you must be a wise babe for bearing that nick name ,go for the guy so precious to you and you need to consider the implication before desicion.don't fall in love with a dreamer,hold on before you say goodbye.

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girl it's urdecision and your life it's all about following your heart, you know like celine dion said,

it's all about you and who u love, if you still love d 1st guy u're deceiving the 1 u're going out wiv, so do ur thing n choose your love

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Sagacious, u know wat? it's all bout your happiness gal.But one

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I don't trust you with your present guy, if you can't decide wether you love him enough to forget a guy that you didn't even sleep with back in high school. Are you sure you really love your current boyfriend? Something tells me deep in your heart, you want to get back to your first love.

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@bettybo i don't know what you think,please try to explain.

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Forget about sentiments and all that sh**,saying how would one of them feel knowing you are leaving him or not taking him back.

You would be even making him feel worse if he finds out later that you decided to stay with him because of some sentimental reasons.I think and bliv it was just some kind of uncontrollable factors that made your FIRST LOVE not to be able to get back to you since you guys left high school and now that he has been able to control them,I can imagine the stress he would have gone through just to get back in touch with you and he confesses he still loves you and wants you back.(He is not your past he is only in your past and our past makes us who we are)

I think you should really try to spend sometime with him and see whether the chemistry is still there and you still feel the same way you felt for him earlier.If you do,Men thats some sh** you should appreciate.i think you shouldnt let him go once more because guess what Girl?you just won a lottery.lol.because first love is not something you shouldnt joke with because you he is in the deepest part of your heart and so are you in his and thats where you would both remain forever.It took you sometime to discover that but now you have discovered it don't make the mistake of your life.

Just and advice anyway don't want you peeps on the second loves side hating on me

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Its a good thing you didnt have sex, trust me breaking off from a first love you've slept with and you love is like a drug problem. You know what i think, get him out of your system soon.

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Sagacious said she cant double date, so if she cant, let her continue with her new lover. What do you think has been happening to your old lover, dont he has a new lover too? how are you sure he is still the same guy you left him 2 years ago. Having anything with him is cheating on your new lover and to me, most women frown so much about cheating or being unfaithful. If you women are acusing men of being unfaithful or cheating, continuing with your old lover will be like preaching what you cant do. Better let him go, and move forward.

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@ Greatpeter if your girlfriends tell you she is leaving for her former Boyfriend that she promised her he wont leave, how would you feel? Because i know i would feel bad ooo.

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Sagacious you have said it all that you love this your first love and he loves you too so much.

What then do we say?

Yoy have concluded with no confusion that you need him back in your life by confessing that you have promised him you'll never say goodbye to him.

So give him the chance that is already created.

I'm sure he'll appreciate you the more.

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@ Badman888 he will feel bad ,because i know he is in love

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Sagacious,

Well, u are contradicting issues. U are in love with another guy yet there is a promise of not leaving the 1st guy. Anyway, consider the merits of the 2 guys and take a stand. Good luck

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You would have to choose one of them you have to compare their personalites and what other thnigs that you want to see in a guy, then choose. but if you leave the present one like that how would he feel.

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There are two main parts to your life - what is behind you and what is ahead of you. You can't change the first part, but what you do now will have a spill-over effect on the second part.

The answer of what you will do will not be provided by anyone on this forum because it is inside you and you will live with ur decision [b]O[/b]n [b]Y[/b]our [b]O[/b]wn,

Think about these and decide,

I just know, if I were yout current guy, I'd feel irritated if you choose the former guy over me and I may drop u first because ur even considering dropping me calls into question the fact that you say you love me.

And if I was the former boyfriend, I'll know deep inside I'm not asking you to do something reasonable when I ask you leave another guy for me. If I really loved u that much, why did I stay out of touch in the first place.

As I said, it's ur life and ur decision. Do it right!!!

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the best thing to do is go back to your first love. lets face reality, definitely she won't be happy with the new guy knowing fully well that the first love still wants her and she too loves him

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Very true!!Do what your heart tells you.There has to be one you love more,one you wanna be with more,that you care about more,and that loves you more.Past or present go with the one that's dearest to your heart.

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Listen to your heart. Forget sentiments. Which one of these guys brings out the best in you? When it comes to relationships darl there ain't rules. Listen to your heart!

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i don't think so digitalove, the thing is she'll never know wht's in it for her unless she tries and finds out. if she's still in love with the guy i don't see why she shouldn't go back and if things don't work she can carry on with her life. because it would be hard for her to move on while her heart is still with another

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Bad idea girl.Better forget about the past and face the future.Carry on with your new life.Good Luck !

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yes u should gave her that chance

becos she's was ya frist ladyyy

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