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Should I Marry My Widow Friend?

Am very close to a beautiful widow of three sons, one is in the university, Though we have discussed the possibility of marriage. She said she will accept if i ask her.

She had made her intent known to her sons, who kicked against her getting remarried.

But when they found out am the one involved, they kind of mellowed down.

Should i go ahead and ask her to marry me? Have anyone been involved in this kind of relationship and marriage? What re your experience?

She is 39yrs while am 36. But her age doesn't bother me an iota inch

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18 answers

Whats anything to do with the user name?

Advice on Nairaland, f cuking hell, I did not know people on this forum are serious as to seek advice or to give advice. You should change your profession then.

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Engineering is a learnt skill, affairs of the heart are inherent in humans and animals. It's something you're born with.

Your advice to the original poster's incredible. If you've nothing to say, keep your flap shut! Still, what's to be expected from someone with a username like yours?

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LANDERS,

cant u pple for once give this guy a good advice, av known this honorable house to be very tact in terms of decisions and advice of wch av found useful often times but as for this discussion on ground me i opt out patapata my hand no dey at all,cant he for once look else where for his wife must he go looking after his widow friend?for God sake there are young and energetic ladies out there who are single,seriously searching and besides he said they both became acquinted bearly 3 months ago HABA!!!!!!!!!!!,my bros thread the terrain with caution ok and be sure ur heart is genuine towards that woman,shld anything happen u will definitely be held responsible.HAVE FUN WHILE IT LAST

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@ rosecare,

which kain such is life preaching be this??

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Siena

from mechanics to match making?

Poster

do wotever u fancy, who cares.

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@zignor, we re two responsible adults, we re not allergic to such pleasures, we want our relationship to remain at that level.

Our lovemaking is as if we re in Eden, With Yanni (Devotion album) playing at the background .What a oooooooooooophs. Good that publicview asked.

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I am a gentleman several times with her, i will never resist her chocolate thighs, if that is what you mean.The going is good in that respect

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@poster

you seem to have a good head on you

and your post suggests this lady does too

i thus see no reason why you would want our

take on this, if i were you i would go ahead,put

a degree of permanency into what you already have

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I think you should ride out your parents view of the situation 4 they know more that we do MOST TIMES.

I hope you come out ok eventually. Take heart bro

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Any new development? straight to the point have you lay her hard?

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I am happy to found myself among the leaque of gentlemen.

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Marriage is not an old scrap that could be abandoned when it gets too rusty. It is a life time involvement therefore you need some body who will ever remain young in your heart.

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Far be it from what you assume, she had been widowed for 9yrs before when we became aquainted just three months ago, my hands re free and clean.

The fact i found out showed it seems an abhorence a never married man, like myself saying i want to marry this widow friend of mine, even friends i thought enlighthened deeply frowned against it, why so in Nigeria? this kind of marriage stuff goes okay in most part of the world, Europe, Continental US, even Arab countries, this is the most preffered marriage of choice.

What's gwam with us?

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My brother pls thats another mans wife living with his children. The way you sound am begining to think that you may have killed the poor man to take his wife.

For Gods sake cant you find your thru love and stop living in cold romantic dreams, or you want to wait till the day his children will beat you up. Stop this bull poo and find a lovely young gal to love, i beg you.

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@sikis, Your contribution makes sense, but it seems you may not have understood my feeling for this widow friend of mine.

I do not bother an aorta of her having three grown up sons. The bare facts which was laid down by my parents was that at present the marriage would mostly favor this widow, but in due course lets say 20yrs from now when the sons will retaliate against me for having taken away their mom, and will do everything within there power to retake thier mom.

For a fact they gave me examples of men within our village village, and environ whom these aftermath had became their lot.

Presently am considering all options and have to laid these bare fact on the table before her.

The most understanding issue is my paents are liberal thinkers, they even suggested that, had it been females re the kids of this widow, they would not hesistiate informing her to come over and see them.

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if you feel like she's got what you desire in a woman, go for her.

safe

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Your posts just confirmed my fears that i will have a hard time finding a man who will marry me against all odds in this country, i was widowed a while ago , i am now 35 and people keep asking why i havent remarried. First of all it is not in my hands, i havent met the " right" man yet. But apart from this i have been a bit weary of dating again, you meet a man and the minute he finds out that you are a widow with 2 kids he takes to his heels, even when they do hang on, i discover that thay just want to take advantage of your vulnerability. Now i know that the ones who truly love you wll not take the plunge becuase of societal values, like someone said love is not enough, Does that mean i should accept the fact that i ll never remarry a man from this country? So whats a lonely widow to do,

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My Fellow Nairalanders,

My Pop and Mom having told them about my intent to marry yhis widow had objected on technical grounds.

1 No matter what may,that in future the children may take away thier mother way from me, it like a fresh spinster getting married to a widower with three grown up sons, thinking that she will be an inheritor to the man's asset, they even gave me examples around.

2 In view of my revealing the widow might seems to have have not much of an assets from the former late hubby, and having not inform them about her intent to get remarried, that immediately she did, she will be called to give account of what and what that belonged to the late hubby, no matter how little it might be, not to allow any inheritance of thier late son to come to me, or us. they gave me a local example of my neice who is living pretty until she vocalised her intent to remarry, her late husband's bros turn to some other things else.

3 Or i may be gullible, t he widow trying to use me to accellerate her remaining sons education or other training, and restrict herself from having any baby though she said he will, and latter blame our if to be childlesness marriage as an avenue to leave me .

All the same i do inform them of bringing the lady home, to forstall on giving a dog a bad name and hang it.

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