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What Do I Tell Him?

A friend came to me for a piece of my mind on this issue. He has a girlfriend who has been very supportive. Infact, she sponsored him in the university. While in the university, he got born again. He told the girl and tried to convince her to get born again too but she will hear nothing of such. Before she agreed to sponsor him, they took an oath. Now he is out of the university and does not want to live in sin because he has seen the light. He doesnt want to displease God by being unequally yoked to an unbeliever. Yet he doesnt want to offend the lady and violate the oath. The lady too is adamant about not changing to been born again.

What do i tell him to do o?

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17 answers

Well, he just wont let me rest, so i gave him my candid opinion:

1. Go for a deliverance session because of his involvement in oath taking. Fast and pray fervently to be delivered, and if possible do it with strong men of God.

2. Embark on a restitution process. I expect the man of God that will join him in prayer to tell him how to go about it.

3. Nevertheless, i suggested that he should sit her down and agree on a repayment plan. Let him and her calculate an average of how much he was getting a month for the sponsorship and agree on the total amount she spent on him. After which, they will agree on how much he will add to it as interest on the money, because it will be perceived to be a loan now. Then they will decide how much he will refund every month.

4. The psychological effect of the break will be borne by both and i doubt if anyone can fully pay for that.

That was my advice to him. I hope i have not mislead him. I would rather advise anyone to settle with his maker than patching a relationship with man.

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Thank You, Thank You.Thank You, He has his plans. He is just using that as an excuse. Who knows, he probably met someone in Uni and wants out but is so ashamed to say so, thus resorting to the old "I found Jesus" theory, MEN!!! hmmmmmmmmmmmmm.

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Cheap born-again ploy!

I do not pity either party (the lady or the guy).

But the 'born-again' word is so misused, so faked and it's so annoying.

Try to deal with a typical so-called 'born-again' peep and you will understand what I mean.

This is 2008! Dem dey deceive us b/f, dem no go continue to deceive us dey go!

After milking the young or old lady dry (both financially and sexually) to improve his poor background, he is now born-again!

Can we have a newer trick?! The above is old school.

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@ Poster

Your friend should not be fooled, let him go ahead and marry her, so long as she is faithful to him. Maybe with time, she would change.

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the guy needs to go and pray seriously.

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Do you really think you need to be insulting to pass a message across? I don't think it is necessary. Please, let's keep foul language off this thread and dialogue like truly matured people,

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The guy is insane, why his own born again say make he no marry the girl, not born again does not mean u're an unbeliver, get dat into ur thick skull dude.

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I havent made up my mind to tell him that. That is just my opinion, but others could have a better solution, that is why i am asking them. Besides, one doesnt rush to give advice in this kind of situation. Love relationships are usually delicate. When the have reconciled now, they will start sharing what advice this person and that person gave and one could become a bad person to either of the parties. So i am taking my time before advising.

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Fiakwa not me,cant be me anyway,am talking abt the good samaritan woman ! had they gotten married ealier on or she got pregnant along the line b4 this born again thingy. . we wont be here discussing this.abeg if both of them are so sharp as to take an oath,they should be brave enough to handle the consequences.your friend is a maga,the babe is a mugu.c'est finis

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what exactly is your friend's concept of being "born again"

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when u knw that u ll honestly advice the guy to leave her,why did u bring it to house for us to advice u? why is he hidding under the canopy of born again.even if the lady becomes born again will that be a prove for him that they were meant for each other? i mean if God says they re not for eachother they ll definately part ways.Has he seek the face of God if actually she is God' s will for him.That shud b put into consideration b4 taking any decision.

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Hmm, ifyalways, i understand your point because you are a lady. but is it not said that even if it takes you ages to discover that you are on a wrong part, it shouldnt take you more than minutes to quit the path? look, the guy has been going in a delicate way, now he has discovered, should he continue in it? it is not as if the lady is no longer rich. She still is. But she doesnt want to accept the guy's new found love- his faith. I can see a crisis already and the best way to avoid it, if you ask me, is to part ways. Honestly!

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Orants pls leave tori.

where were you and your tots when this girl was seeing this boy through school?

she didnt force him into the oath taken,it was done willingly i guess.

This girl has not been fetish b4,she wont learn it now.why wud she have cause to be fetish again?shes married to her dream man so what else ? Your guy knew abt her wealth b4 deciding to take the oath with her,its not like she became rich overnite.seriously,this guy have no reason at all to leave her.If shes leaving cos hes found another babe,fair enough. . .let him say so sinncerely and not some born again crap and bla bla.even a blind man can see tru that.

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well, let's look at the issue from another angle. I havent told my friend this, but that is the way i feel. Now, if a lady finds it difficult to follow your belief and insists on marrying you, it tells me something. One, it may be difficult agreeing on issues in such a home.

2. Two, it may be difficult to manage such a woman, looking at it from the vantage point of her having more financial muscle than the guy.

3. I think such a lady will also be diabolical. For God's sake, why should he make the poor boy take an oath of loyalty or was it allegiance before he could help. i think she is diabolical. I have told my friend immediately, that he made a mistake by taking an oath, but i guess he was just desperate to improve himself and never thought he could be born again. i guess he didnt see anything wrong with oath taking then. But really, i wont like to ask him to go ahead and marry the girl.

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Just say it as it is . . . u ain't ready yet!

either he'll wait for you until u're ready or he'll move to find someone who is.

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But what if he marries her and she takes her back into the world? remember what Jazebel did to the most wise king Solomon, in all his wisdom? Do you still think he should go ahead and ignore that fact?

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Does being born again mean that one has seen the light? Can't one live a life of holiness and not fornicate and do sinful things without being born-again? How many of these our so-called "born-again" folk follow their faith?

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