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What Do You Think About A Distance Relationship?

What do you think about distance r/ship between you and your patner? Is it good or bad? Would you engage yourself to it. If yes give your reasons and if not please also tell me why you wouldn't.

              I am really confused now and I need your response to this.

    Thank you so much as you partake in this.

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43 answers

Hi Topup, I really appreciate the advice, yah as u said,

I talked with her, as i said in my post, I won her back, but In my place we have this saying "Bottom wey ant bite, dey always dey alert" what i mean is that, even as i won her back, That level of trust and Placing i had 4 her ain't there again, she feels bad 'bout 4 havin' wavered in her love 4 me.

Sometimes I'm even confused myself, I'm sure i don't love her as before, twill take some time even If it will.

Maybe i gave her much attention and love, as u said, she even says it. twas one of her excuses. she says she fears our relationship, that i love her 2 much and that leaves her wondering if she was worth me, that she's afraid and ain't sure of herself leaving up to my love, that left me wondering whether she loved me at all. cos i've neva heard of gals leaving their guys because they loved em 2much, have u?

I'm just half commited to the whole thing now. When I'm thru School n made enough money cos thats the main thing, then I think i'll give a try again, bt 4 now, I just can't waste my energy loving again, I don't think any girl deserves it 4 now, until i'm ready for it again. I've got enough female friends, i think i'll leave it at that, when I'm Hot, i find a girl, but i dont think i wanna love again 4 now, till I'm ready

wht do u think?

and once again thanks for the advice.

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Its cool, pretty cool runnin a distance relationship, it makes u wanna cry somex wen ur missing dat 1 u really do luv, tz sucha sensual tin, it depends on ur psychological strength nd mental indepth-some ppl fill der totz wit ill stuffs-thinkin dat der baby cld be bangin another dude or gal wen der far apart,n it kills der level of trust, dats a major set back tu distance relationship, u need ta access before u process, dont go thinkin wat u wont want he or she thinkin, tz a basic, remember"life z a journey"we r bound tu leave de presence of our luv'd ones during life process,

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cbase, man I wish all men could be as committed to their girlfriends as you 'were'. I think if you go and screw around ,you will regret it because you compromised your standards because of your feelings. Cheating is bad full stop, you didn't like it when it happened to you. If you must, maybe leave her so she will realise what she has lost but my prefered advice is to have an honest chat with her, telling her ALL your feelings and desires. I knew for a fact when my guy had gone that I might get tempted, but I knew I would never do anything to compromise myself. There WILL be temptations but to compromise yourself is a terrible thing to do to ones self and the other person in the relationship. I have to mention though, I would NOT have felt the temptation as much if at the stage we were at, my guy (at the time) was treating me right. It sounds like you treated your girlfriend with nothing but respect and love --- she took that for granted (it happens a lot in couples - as they say, you don't realise what you have until it's gone). Honestly, if my guy had been loving and caring instead of the uncaring, distant and awkward guy he slowly began to be, I would have been loyal to him. My ideal situation is to have one man and one man only, I don't care about attention, the only attention I want is from my guy.

Sometimes, it annoys me, how unfair love is, how people talk about girls being unfaithful yet you know you gave your all to your guy and he still disrespected you, or guys being unloving when cbase gave his all to his girlfriend yet she confused him and wasn't being completely honest to him.

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This is one of the very few things in life I feel that no advice can change. You honestly have to look independently at the relationship at hand. Would you two do anything for each other? It's not about HOW long you've been with or the things you've done, it is about the QUALITY of the bond between you. I believe you should have some doubts, but if you start to worry too much that can indicate lack of faith or trust in the relationship. You need both to hack the LD relationship out. You need to trust each other A LOT, not just like each other LOVE each other, and BOTH of you should truly believe that there is no one better. This will make it a lot easier on both of you if you already feel that the relationship is validated. If you don't feel this way, little things have an opportunity of getting in the way. You can also choose to ease off the relationship a bit during the LD part, so that you both have time to breath and decide what you want in future, otherwise, I don't see why LD wouldn't work, if the two are committed and love each other and most importantly mature enough to handle the ups and downs.

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I dont think i can endure these long distance relationships - there are too many cold nights and too many temptations.

I would never agree to it.

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am in total agreement to wat hot stepper said cos am also in to distance relationship and i love it just dat at times i get bord and need som1 like him close to me but his nowhere to be found and the only thing that encourages me is that even when u are not to trust ur partner try to trust cos it solves a lot of problem

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its okay! in as much as you two know wat your doing.

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It may work for some, and not for others

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long distance relationship is all commitment ,commitment commitment everything else is seconday

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love is not enough.

its lots of work trust me. If you dont have anything solid on ground i'll advice you break it.

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It's possible, though it rarely works I hear

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OUT OF SIGHT IS OUT OF MIND,

PLEASE, USE YOUR SENSE

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ha ha ha

@gabe_logan

you're an honest and truthful guy, takes a lot to admit that

but tis all over, all we need do now is get a wee bit serious and

take care of our hearts.

for God's sake na we suppose to dey break hearts and not vice-versa.

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guy, i feel you. i no go lie, after that incident, shame catch me. i didnt go out for about 3days. i had never felt more ashamed of myself.

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@gabe_logan

while i was reading this story, i was scared, why? beacuse somethin similar happened to me. this time, i was the guy scoring with my friends gfriend. hope its not u. the guy was on it, he came back and caught me in a compromising position with his girfriend and he still made the relationship work even after he caught her. really nice and mature guy.

fast foward, months later, i was in a long distance relationship (i was in lagos, my girl was in gombe) and i found out she was screwing around.

my take on long distance relationships, i don't really know. they say out of sight is out of mind but on the other hand, it takes a lot of trust and resolve to make it work.

@gabe_logan

Guess you now feel what your friend, the one you were with his gal must have felt, you know as they say wht goes around surely comes around.

I so much believed in true Love, but now i know until i'm ready and very sure to get married then i would leave my heart to love that way, but as for now, OMO na love nwa nti nti, jeje

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while i was reading this story, i was scared, why? beacuse somethin similar happened to me. this time, i was the guy scoring with my friends gfriend. hope its not u. the guy was on it, he came back and caught me in a compromising position with his girfriend and he still made the relationship work even after he caught her. really nice and mature guy.

fast foward, months later, i was in a long distance relationship (i was in lagos, my girl was in gombe) and i found out she was screwing around.

my take on long distance relationships, i dont really know. they say out of sight is out of mind but on the other hand, it takes a lot of trust and resolve to make it work.

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I believe it works!tlking from experience

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long distance relationship still works, atleast if l was not really directly affected , l have a friend who now is married atfter a honest and sincere relationship witha girl outside nigeria for 6 years, so there are exception ooo

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it never workes unless if u r determined 2 keep in contact like call eachoda everyday

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it good for Casanovas but bad for serious minded, loving guys. believe me.

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Just keep ur mind of evil or stop thinking about what he is doing now or whatever the circumstances and live free within ur mind and body if he loves u he do all the 80% calling an u will just do the 60%

For babymine it does work if only u practise

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Just keep ur mind of evil or stop thinking about what he is doing now or whatever the circumstances and live free within ur mind and body if he loves u he do all the 80% calling an u will just do the 60%

For babymine it does work if only u practise

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Distance can only work for two people who are committed by marriage, " for better; or for worse".

Any other way gives room for loopholes!!

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From experience:

A long distance relationship is feasible but tasking and challenging. The key ingredient there is constant communication and mutual trust. If you do not believe in these and also practise them, then forget it.

If you believe that your boyfriend is shinning one white chick on a particular friday night, then that's exactly what he's doing. However, if you believe that he's working his Bottom out or studying so hard, then that's exactly how it is.

You desist from heresay and caste your mind on the positive aspects of it.

However, it is a very difficult way to handle a relationship. It also often tends towards heartbreak.

My 2cents shaa

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aint even down with this long distance shiit. no way. nahhhh, its too much and i hail those that do it. una strong.

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I'v been in it since 2001. Though d challenges are just too much as d guy,am stil into it.She loves me so dearly and i love her more dearly.

My girl is a simple girl.I trust her with all my heart.Though some times i start tinkin otherwise. It takes a strong guy to get involved in distance R. An undetermined guy will surely get carried away.Wit time,i noticed that i cud neva give my heart out to another girl. Though its distance,to me its true love.Am even tinkin of writin a movie bout it sef. NB.My girl is in Jos while am in Lagos.

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I'v been in it since 2001. Though d challenges are just too much as d guy,am stil into it.She loves me so dearly and i love her more dearly.

My girl is a simple girl.I trust her with all my heart.Though some times i start tinkin otherwise. It takes a strong guy to get involved in distance R. An undetermined guy will surely get carried away.Wit time,i noticed that i cud neva give my heart out to another girl. Though its distance,to me its true love.Am even tinkin of writin a movie bout it sef. NB.My girl is in Jos while am in Lagos.

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Am not really for the whole Long distance dating thing, it takes 2 much effort and as everyone has said, u really don't know what your partner is doing the whole time your away.  If u really love each other, u'd make it work in the sense that you'd find a way to stick 2geder either by you moving or your partner moving so that you'l be close.

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It works if you are unlucky to not catch your partner. Believe me, even in a  true love poo happens but if you do not  catch him/her, i think you would say it works.

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Hotstepper, i so agree with you. Long distance can be lovely and it can be bad - it just depends on the people in the relationship

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distance relationship is lame, don't waste ur time involvin in it. u neva kno what ur so called partna is doin where he or she is at. what if that cravin for cuddlin or kissin starts knockin on ya door, who u gon turn to? phone intimacy or whateva ain't gon cut it.

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U said it well hotsteper.

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itz a choice u have to make so wuteva we get 2 say here won't matter, am involve in one and lovng it, itz all about love and trust whether da person is 100 miles away or lives next to u, as i alwayz say, love has no boundaries

@eve, u make me laugh, let me tell u what u might not know, even if your b/f lives beside u, if he want to cheat or do rubbish, he can still do it without u knowing so cheating or wuteva is not distance friendly or player hater so it all comes down to love and trust and diz issue depends on individuals

moreova, there r people that can't date people in their locality because they get bored easily so we r now back 2 diz famous proverb, one man's food is another man's posion.

my dear, so itz a decision u gotta make, let distance not destroy wuteva love you 2 have 4 eachother. good luck

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but some does it,they say it's love

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i think it's foolish,

u cant see da person,u just call da person ,u just dey call da

person u dont know what's da person's doing behind u there,

it's nuthing to me,

me and u will just play,but it's foolish

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the only thing in it is if u guys trully love each other then carry on its no big deal

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