«Home

Why am i like this? Plz advise.

Lately,My girl and I had a phone-fight and she told me da better truth that i am being "possessive".i dont want to be a possessor,i wanna be a great lover in all ramification.please advise me on how can i get rid of dis possessiveness 4rm my system.am no jealous dude.Sincere advices needed please.

Avatar
Newbie
15 answers

@poster, u are sounding very confusing cos being possessive is quite different from having bad temper.

About ur possessiveness, i will support "190" cos wat he siad is just the basic truth. U become possessive over wat u like, love and cherish and same goes for jealousy but it doesn't have to be extreme. That is where u need to watch ur temper. U dont get possessive or jealous over things u dont love. Make ur girl understand that u are being possessive just because she means a lot to u. I can be very possessive when it comes to my babe and i see no reason why i shouldn't be cos i love her for real. Some people said something about trusting her and the likes, being possessive does not mean u dont trust the person, it means protecting what is yours, wat u love and value so much.

But shouting on the phone and cutting people off while a conversation is going on is as sign of bad temper and u need to watch it else it will affect your relationship with people. U cant get rid of it my brother, u can only control it. The power of a great man is his ability to put his emotions under control. Learn to be calm and listen to people. Furthermore, learn to listen to your babe, don't yell at her even while arguing. Hear her side of the story and be more free to ask/take her suggestions. I believe these tips and other u have received so far should help.

Best of luc.

0
Avatar
Newbie

Thanks to you all 4 ya advice. @madlady: thanks.am down with that.u da best.

0
Avatar
Newbie

It is one of the hardest things to do, but you must fight this side of your nature.

When you are about to bombard her with your tongue, think twice, tell her something nice that you like about her, why you like/love being with her. This will be more helpful to you both.

0
Avatar
Newbie

I am not bad tempered.please how can i put this attitude under control.

0
Avatar
Newbie

You need to work on your temper.

0
Avatar
Newbie

I trust her.i give her freedom,time and space.am not the jealous and possessive type.what i hate is being cut off when having a conversation with a girl.it makes me get so furious and agitated. I hate and abhor it to d extreme that i delete such contacts and warn them never to call my phone in their life.i kept acting as if i owned them and i never knew this until my girl told me tru d phone.this what happen between us and i never knew i was being possessive until she told me pointblank.i got mad and yell @ her.i apologise later on and thank her 4 letting me know.i hated myself afterward.i want to get rid of this habit b4 it go boom and destroy my relationship and new friendship.how can i stop this?

0
Avatar
Newbie

@poster,beleive me, being possessive irritates ladies. I had a boyfriend who was way too possessive during my university days.As soon as I went for my NYSC,I totally forgot about him,and it was not as if I had met someone else.I felt like I had just been released from a cage,and I let myself fly.This was a relationship that was on for about 5yrs.After my NYSC,I tried to make it work,but it was too obvious that we just couldnt be together anymore.

Learn to trust your partner,and remember that she has a mind of her own too.It makes her feel respected and comfortable with you.

0
Avatar
Newbie

poster dont listen to them

they are telling u the Gospel lies

you have to be possessive over whats yours

you dont expect (you) to be possessive over another man's girl

shes yours thats why u are been careful

with this recent HIV everywhere even in the air,

we have to be careful, keep up the good work man

she wud never find another better lover anywhere apart from u~

when people come 1 direction,190 goes the other direction

0
Avatar
Newbie

You become possessive when U're 2 scared about losing someone. You can't say U aren't jealous and still be possessive, possessiveness is as a result of jealousy, U have 2 work on urself, try not 2 blow up when U see ur girlfriend with other guys, and whenever U're about 2 interrogate her over some act of hers or somewhere she's been to, pause and ask urself the motives of your interrogation, if you don't have a good reason, then desist,cos that's prolly your possessive nature at work. Besta luck

0
Avatar
Newbie

try and work on your self-esteem you are prolly battling insecurity,maybe you think someone might just snatch her and that thought is

making you paranoid,work on that and your attitude,could be the problem **just a thought**

0
Avatar
Newbie

You really need to have other girls as friends for you to be thinking about her all the time, because from your behavior she might leave for that behavior, women don't like to be caged by the guys rather they like to be free, even if you're being suspicious about her don't let her know.

www.youridealguysorlady.blogspot.com

0
Avatar
Newbie

girls are like eggs if u push it , it will damage. trust her love her and give freedom to her

, all the very best

0
Avatar
Newbie

Trust! Learn to trust her!

0
Avatar
Newbie

trust yourself,then u can trust someone else.

0
Avatar
Newbie
Your answer
Add image

By posting your answer, you agree to the privacy policy and terms of service.