If you're one of those who don#t wanna get married. . . share with us your reasons . . .
I personally want to get married. But I have a friend and a sister who are extremely sceptical. The friend has even decided to join the convent (though she's not in one yet). She's a big girl (size 16-ish) and I honestly believe, the issue is that society thinks she should stay with men her size, and she's not attracted to men her size, it's not that she eats like a pig, she is genetically predisposed, and you can tell she is not a binger, because she eats a lot healthier than me, salad and sandwiches and meat and great meals. I think she would make a perfect wife, and she's so loving and caring, it's just boys my age don't want a woman like her. I pray her time will come and I pray he is a knight because she deserves no less.
My sister, after seeing many failed marriages around her, is extremely sceptical and doesn't even try when it comes to men, they are off her radar, and it's sad, it's not that guys don't come up to her, she just doesn't believe their genuinity, she's not attracted to African men who have not had exposure to western culture, because she often sees them, just with the same mentality of; "the kitchen is the wife's domain.", and she's very ambitious.
As for pcguru, cheer up, love's never been that simple. I know it's hard, but with that attitude, that's exactly what women are going to think. Have you tried building good friendships?? With friendships, you can be who you really are and then if any of your female friends responds positively, you'll know and you can try your luck. Love's difficult for everyone, some of the best looking, richest men, still pick bad candidates.
Sometimes I say, we perform the best when we have the most constraints.
As for money, maybe it's because I don't live in Nigeria at the moment, maybe that's why I actually don't see the big deal. How can someone who is 23 years old be loaded anyways?? What are people expecting from each other?? It's far much more realistic to expect to build lives together and not to expect the other person to do all the dirty work.
Who wants a woman who's merely attracted to their money anyway??
so are you then telling me that because women in Nigeria are not
filling for divorce that means the are ultimately happy and satisfied in their marriages?
have you forgotten the stigma of a divorced woman in Nigeria?
Do you know how many married men in Nigeria today that do not
respect the institution of marriage? What happens in Nigeria today when a woman
is cheated on by her husband? Everyone tells her to go and pray about it!
Some of your points are valid but surely they aren't all true
we are in the 21st century afterall and everything has come a long way
from the days of our grandfathers. Ultimately our marriages today are what we make of it!
that is frankly not true. the rise in divorce rates is not down to women getting "wiser". Wiser to what? Most women would rather save their marriages than work out because the dude wont take out the thrash.
We had stronger marriages in the past because we didnt have the TV culture trying to define what marriage was. Today love = we have good sexual chemistry . . . in the old days families were heavily involved in who you married, you were more mature and sex wasnt the defining reason for marriage.
Today we have sexually active teens running away from family to marry, magazines have distorted the image of the ideal male and female such that we are forever unsatisfied with our partner's looks . . .
it has nothing to do with males but everything to do with the culture. In Nigeria women are wiser, but they are not filing for divorces left right and center.
Davidyllan wrote: "50 yrs ago marriages were not perfect but 100 times better than the nonsense we see today"
50 yrs ago the dominant male society ruled hence marriages appeared to be "perfect'. In that era men were dominant and treated women like chattels. Today, some women don't stand for that BS, hence the divorce
Someone sent this to me. . . . .Interesting
Little girls watch the disney stories and dream of their prince charming. The prince rescues them and brings them a life of love, luxury, ease and fun. Then when these little girls grow up they are looking for a prince - and marry. They may try to change their real man into a prince and this ruins the relationship. They are disappointed when they realize that the fairy tales aren't true - and can't adjust to reality and be happy with what they have. Men are motivated by sex. They may work hard at the relationship at first to win over the object of their affection (and to get sex). Once they have "won" that woman they stop or reduce efforts at romancing. This harms the relationship. Many women would be better off not marrying. Many men would be better off just continuing to casually date. When children are involved it is best for them to be raised by two responsible adults who love each other - but this may not last. Marriage is over romanticized in most of the media (giant, glamourous weddings, fairy tales, etc). This is part of the problem.