«Home

Will This Relationship Work?

Im dating a guy dat is 5yrs older dan I am, buh i am steps ahead of him. Hez still in sch, 300l (5yr course) n im serving presently wit d hope of travelln out soon 4 my masters, tho i love him, i need to b realistic n i need ur honest opinions, will it work?, wat can i do to make it last?

Avatar
Newbie
27 answers

it is not going to work.

enjoy yourself while it lasts.

Your challenges, vision, goals is going to grow apart sooner or later.

0
Avatar
Newbie

Hey, I wont advice u wait too long. Enjoy it now, but keep ur eyes open. If u see someone else , better or just as good switch! Waiting for a guy in school is a bad idea! School love is still shacking u. Forget, there are lots of wonderful men out there. Like me for one. lol.

He has 2yrs to go now, then naija, strike NYSC , etc, so we are looking at 5yrs here, the earliest u can get married. He has to settle get a job and all, then u put ur whole life on hold for him, then bang! One morning he says he is no longer interested! Just find anoda, u hear? Love is everywhere. It matters o. How does he handle it? Is he confident with it or he just likes the fact that it is cool to date a corper when u are in school. If he is insecure he might soon start to resent u. Why do I have dis feeling u are not as crazy abt him as u think? You like him, yes, but deep down u feel guilty u are ahead of him and u want to make up by holding on to a dying flame. Does he expect u to wait? If he does then that is the surest reason to run now! Besides ur parents won't even agree. And he is always broke, Abi?

0
Avatar
Newbie

@estrella & sofeco, thank u so much, ur advice is rily very much appreciated

0
Avatar
Newbie

@sofeco, my fiance and i are making moves to get married before the end of the year.It hasnt been as easy journey but God has been seeing us through,

0
Avatar
Newbie

True talk

But I will like to know what happened between you and that ur bf/fiancee?.

Won't you mind gisting me?.

0
Avatar
Newbie

Look  love, one thing I've learned from being in a relationship that is quite similar to yours is that what works for one may not work for the other.There are no hard and fast rules for relationships because its all relative.Ive been in a six year relationship because i was also ahead of my man, when i was serving,he wasnt even in school! Presently,he is in 200 hundred level in a part time programe and I''m working, He became the CEO of his own company recently and things are looking up, Now i wont say its been easy but the fact of the matter is that when you know what you want,you stick to it and see it to the end, by the time ure trhough wit service n doing your masters,your man would have been in final year, are you willing to wait for him? if you arent let me ask u this,where are you running to? there are many pple running ino marriage and running out of it, i hear cases of women who couldnt wait for the man they truely love because of time or status and married someone else only to regret it, if ur man has all the qualities you want in a man,stand by him, and be a praying woman, thats the only way to make sure things work out, dont do it if you dont have peace about him, if you are really sure and The Spirit tells you that you should stay,then stay! In the meantime,be careful who you listen to for advice and listen more to God then pple around you, Only a strong woman can make something like this work, all the best!

0
Avatar
Newbie

I think once U r sill young, then hold on to him only if he's a responsible guy and is matured enough to handle you and also if he has all the things you need in a man and if he treats you wella.

I won't lie to you responsible guys are really hard to find out there, all U'll get is a cheater even if they now find out that you are a READY MADE and STILL YOUNG.

I know what am talking about cos I know what most of those guys discuss.

That's Y we've got enough single ladies out there.

God will put U through sha.

0
Avatar
Newbie

yeah, tho datz bcuz im servin in ma state sha, i redeployd 4rm where i wuz postd to.

0
Avatar
Newbie

he wasnt a jambite, he had probs wiv his first uni, he had to start all oer again, wen he was a jambite, i wuz still in j.s.s 2!

0
Avatar
Newbie

@Op

If those are the only reasons u've stated

i'ill advise you personal to stick to what you have

The problem we humans have got it,we think we know what will happen in future

Only God knows the future.

Something very similiar like this happened to a very close friend of mine

she was in uni 300 level n the guy was still trying to get into either uni or poly

Her thinking was exactly like what you said n to be honest she did ask our advise n we told her that it would

be better to break with him n search for other suitors but if we knew what God had in stock for her

if we've also considered other factor that they understood each other,they've stood together in trying time(the girl is Igbo n guy halfcaste( half yourba n half one of these other African countries) so u can understand that their families wasn't in agreement with their relationship.

To caught the long story short

The person that helped her gain admission did a shady entrance n when Unilag was cleaning up they notice n withdraw her from uni n the guy she broke up with now has graduated n is working

while apart that she hasn't met some like him,she isn't married,didn't go to university.

We make plans but ultimately God is in control of all things

A lot of people ask advice but little follow it.

Don't break up with him for those reasons expect if you know

he isn't treating you well n got major faults.

0
Avatar
Newbie

did u read d rest of d post at all? im a graduate n im serving alredi, hez still in school, 300l, 5yr course, dat is steps ahead of him, im no female chauvinist! m jus facing facts here

0
Avatar
Newbie

dis is exactly wah im doin rite now, jus takin it as it goes, fanks mayne

0
Avatar
Newbie

@Mudley313, im jus botherd n confused,

@Omoaghe, fanks 4 dat

0
Avatar
Newbie

hey here is d best advice 4 u,if u love respect and believe in him it will work out.many are mariied but they are not happy with their married life.they are enduring it instead of enjoying it.the bible says wisdom is d principal thing,in all thy getting get understanding.u gotta be wise.Everyman is d architect of his life so construct urs wisely so u will be happy years later 4 d steps u have taken.4 me any guy dat does not have d fear of God is like a wind dat can be blown 2 any direction.I wish u d best in life.dnt leave dat guy becos of those shady tins u said.true luv conquers all odd.I believ in it.

0
Avatar
Newbie

the fact that you're asking this question in the first place is a problem

0
Avatar
Newbie

i think you sholud enjoy it while it lasts and mind you by the time you finish serving he will have at least @ years left and he still has to serve as well. I will not say leave him or stay with him rather the situation will sort itself out and i know by then you will decide.

0
Avatar
Newbie

@Nenum, cuz he referred to me as 'p4m'

0
Avatar
Newbie

@pweety me

I think u knw d answer to ur question, just think. No matter the advice u'll do what your mind says so FOLLOW UR MIND,

0
Avatar
Newbie

hmmmmmmm, how did she know that 190 was refering to pweety4me,

0
Avatar
Newbie

thankz peeps

@190, im 'pweety me' not pweety4me' n ma bf isnt "common"

0
Avatar
Newbie

@p4m

so ur comon bf is jst in sch and u de serve.seems we both r a match

0
Avatar
Newbie

pweety dnt brk up wv d guy if u love him.am telln u dis cos u r 1 of dos gals on nl dat i wud av lov 2 date, so pweety if u lov him dnt quit.no mata ur positn in life

0
Avatar
Newbie

Its difficult to say,it happened to me,but am a guy ,she called too say she will be getting married,while i was studing here a guy was digging her Kitty-Cat.Goodluck

0
Avatar
Newbie

hmmmmmmmmmm,\

wat do want to hear, break up with him or continue with him, or double date.

lol

just enjoy it while it last and if it last for ever better for you.

0
Avatar
Newbie
Your answer
Add image

By posting your answer, you agree to the privacy policy and terms of service.