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Would You Continue To Date An Hiv Positive Girl Even If You Knew Her Status?

you fall in love with a lady and she tells you later in the relationship that she is HIV positive. would you continue to be in a relationship with her?

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17 answers

@ okija _juju

you have really made some reasonable points here and i can understand your arguement.

but what we saying here is, you find out some u love got the virus, you shld know even if they

got it thru cheating or any of the other ways it can be contracted, that it cld have been anyone

even you. no one is above sin, no one is above mistake. and when that happens. you dnt be the first

to discrimate and run,expecially when u are the one that much is required from, remember u professed love.

if u say it cant happen to you, let me throw this question to the whole NLers, can anyone boast that they have

never, ever had a careless sex,once in their life time, not even while u got drunk or the opportunity came and there

was no condon on hand. pls lets be realistic. 1 out of 2 nigerians do it once in a while without protection.we can testify

to it,look at the number of girls that get knocked up everyday. anyone cld have got the disease that way, we are all cheats,

liars,like most are lying right now,that they av never been careless. i have gona for 3 voluntary test too, i am negative. but what

prompted those test u may ask. i had careless sex those three occasions, i am sure thats why u had yours too. now imagine u had come

positive in one of those test, then your GF runs off, how will you feel. and yes i agree hiv/Aids have no cure, and so does many other diseses

like the sickle cell i mentioned earlie, and my brother we all gonna die someday,some of us even b4 an hiv patient, from a little thing as cold self.

so dnt go boasting and stop the discrimination. hiv pple need love and care. and besides there may be a cure one day and some of those who have it

will be alive and get cured. maybe the girl/boy u ran away from then. how can u now face then as healthy pple. some disease just like hiv had no cure

in times pass, like the very common malaria we know today.

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@ Smooooooth

Really beautiful answer. I swear that your post is really well written. Soundslike something straight out of an AIDS awareness campaign. (No pun intended)

Now back to reality.

Like I stated, everything changes with the introduction the virus.

And you are wrong, HIV/AIDS is not like any other disesase, it has no cure.

A relationship (especially a sexual one) will never and can never be the same between an infected partner and a healthy partner.

The sex will no longer be the same, and even the mind will also be affected.

Caution will be the watch word of th relationship.

We will not be able to share certain stuffs anymore (especially sharp/body peircing objects).

She will constantly be on medication for a disesase that will eventually kill her.

My own life is at risk.

Having a baby is now a formality as against just sex as it should be in normal relationships.

Except she has the same strain as Magic Johnson, she will certainly die of the disease.

The chances of our child not being infected isnt 100% guaranteed.

I could go on and on.

O! I have attended those seminars, read books, listened to panelists both on radio and television, but that still does not change the reality of the issue, IT HAS NO CURE.

I know it would hurt like crazy. Infact, the other person might even be suicidal from the trauma of the disease coupled with the break-up. But I am only human. I wouldnt expect anybody who isnt family to stick by me.

Ofcourse I will be there foor the person physically, (I'd love to add spiritually but I don't do that poo). I will care about the person cause thats the kind of person I am. But as far as the relationship is concerned, its no longer fun (because its now textbook stuff, too many do's and don't's, cautions and precautions e.t.c), its no longer pratical, and it is now harzardous to one of us. It would be selfish of the infected partner to ask the other to stay.

And by the way, I am HIV negative. And I plan to remain so. I have had 4 different tests carried out, two were even involuntary. The most recent one was in August.

NOTE: People living with HIV are people like you and I. They deserve all the love we can offer and they should also be treated with respect. Spread the word, not the virus

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thank God there are still your kind

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hiv is just like any other kind of disease

and it cld happen to anyone, and hiv infected

pple are just like you and i, so they need care

love and attention. the response here just shows how

ignorant pple are,with all the awareness thats is going about.

infact the way some of you sound, u need to go for voluntary testing

and counselling, cos it shows that u are the ignorant and most vulnerable

specie that they have been trying to save.

@post

my answer is yes i will continue, we may stop sex, or we cld use protection

and if she wants a baby, then i can help her thru test tube fertility or something.

its just like having a GF with Sickle cell.

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Folks,I try to be frank as I possibly can in my views here in niraland,maybe we can save lives and make things better for a lot of us in this land of plenty but home of nothin!

Speaking candidly, independent of how she got infected,we can no longer be intimate sex-wise. I promise,and that's candid, to give her all the support she needs in whatever ramification, even occassionaly sexwise (she's just human too you know,and nature calls) with protection of course but the issue of marriage is out of it. I can't make her live with the knowledge that our wedding is a sham,what's a marital life without conjugal relations/despite what the critics would say.

Granted,I hear a lot has come up as regards managing the illness, you know babies born from hiv infected moms not having hiv and stuff,but til there is a concrete cure for the ailment,I beg to differ.

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Hmmm!

Now thats deep.

No!! This changes everything!! or does it??

Well the answer still stands.

I'm sorry honey, I love you, but poo just hit the fan.

And moreover if she really oves and cares about me, she'll let me go. Cos if the script were flipped, I would.

FFS's we are talking about the HIV/AIDS virus here o!!

There is no time for cheap sentiments and stuff. I know all that bullshit about stigmatisation and all worth not, but what if I happen to get the virus in the name of love??

Lets be honest with ourselves, 0.00000001% of us will stay with her. Remember that all it would take for you to become a carrier like her would be just one lousy mistake. Maybe a broken condom.

I still maitain that the mode of infection is irrelevant, cause the effect is the same all round.

I will simply stick by her for the duration it takes her to come to terms with her condition and then pull the cord. Cos thats the wise and smart thing to do.

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Dating would be downgraded from "INTIMATE LEVELS" to "NON-INTIMATE AND INFREQUENT LEVELS"

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@ topic

no

Life no get part two.

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when would some nairalanders speak their mind and be truthful? ? ?

i dont care what responses i get

but seriously i wont dare continue after knowing the status, i only pray she'll reveal before sex and not after sex cos if the info comes after then i dont know what i would do to her and myself

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Ofcourse i would, but definitly wont think of marriage for my hearts sake.

I dont wanna be a widower especialy

Wen u know parner's gat 50% chance on death.

Eeeeeew

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depends on how she got the virus. cheat? or accident?

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Re: Would You Continue To Date An Hiv Positive Girl Even If You Knew Her Status?

« #2 on: August 30, 2007, 05:05 AM »

so u don't really love him then, this is the time he needs you most and u say u can't stick with him? what if he was born with the desease? bad blood etc. and you can't be there with him?

if u were the one will u continue ,how can u want to cut ur life short becos of love

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yes please answer the question. I am more interested in what your answer will be!!!!

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u say wht u will do

answer e question pliz

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so u dont really love him then, this is the time he needs you most and u say u cant stick with him? what if he was born with the desease? bad blood etc. and you cant be there with him?

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that question is hard to answer

bt to be honest i won't.i can't gv myself to someone with that horrible disease.

can't sacrifice to die ,coz of love.bt if i love him i may just conbtinue dating him but i won't marry him.Let him suffer alone for his own deeds.i can't live e rest of my life using PROTECTOR PLUS.thats e truth.PERIOD

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@vicade thank you dear I admire your intelligence

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