How important is virginity in Islam? Should both male and female keep their virginity until the day they get married? Let’s see what people familiar with the matter say.
What is male and female virginity in Islam?
Technically, virginity is the state in which both men and women do not take part in sexual intercourse before the marriage. This works both ways and is obligatory for both sexes in Islam. However, there is a broader notion known as chastity which is also concerning things like petting, touching, kissing, etc. A man can still be a virgin, but this might be merely a question of technical explanation, as he has far lost his chastity.
How important is virginity before marriage in Islam?
It is imperative. First of all, it is a general commandment for all people to be virgins and only lose virginity in marriage. This is what all people of the Islam should stick to as this is paramount to the understanding of inner and outer purity and sanity.
As Doctor Fyad-deen Olabisi mentioned that the Prophet s.a.w. recommended marrying virgins. The point is not in seeing the blood on the first night after the wedding. It is known that not all the ladies will have blood then. But the point is in knowing that your husband to be or your wife to be saved ad kept themselves for you, and no other man or woman touched him or her before you. There is a special bond in knowing this.
The doctor also mentioned that women tend to have their first lovers on their minds long after they are not together anymore. It is a strong image which stays with years later. So, it is better to remain a virgin before marriage in order to have both your body and your thoughts only belonging to your spouse.
Here are important words of the Doctor in question on this notion: “Virginity may not tell you the state of the heart, but it definitely sends a strong message of morality, fidelity, chastity, loyalty and good home training and upbringing. No right thinking man will like to wish away such rare and invaluable precious qualities in a woman.
We are not marrying from Hollywood, Bollywood or Nollywood. We are marrying from a pool of well-trained Muslim sisters from real Islamic homes. That is why Allah says that the fornicator should marry the fornicatress, and the pure and chaste men should also marry the pure and innocent women.”
Apart from that, being a virgin before one gets married and dedicates his whole life to serving one person and having the solid basis of the relationship with him is a sign of inner strength and devotion. No matter whether one practiced Islam before marriage or not, just the fact that they saved their virginity is showing that they have the dignity and one can trust them. They are beautiful on the inside, and the outside and even the civilization pleasures did not tempt them.
Moreover, as some people say, there are several things that one should take into account when talking about the meaning and importance of virginity in Islam is that men are recommended to get married to women that are virgins rather than those that even though chaste used to be married before.
At least so stated the Prophet (s.a.w.). Exceptions are innocent women who lost their virginity through rape or exercises when small but they must feel the loss and wish they didn't lose it physically though they remain chaste because virginity is a virtue and remains a virtue in today's immoral world though lack of hayah i.e. Islamic shyness and modesty in women is making many to disregard the sanctity and sacredness attached to virginity.
“Women impure are for Men impure, and Men impure are for Women impure, and Women of purity are for Men of virtue, and Men of purity are for for Women of purity” (Quran24:26)
READ ALSO: Can I become a Virgin again?
Here is another quote by a man who is close to the issue. “The Prophet s.a.w. said that Paradise is guaranteed for any Muslim man who succeeds in raising three, two or even one daughter with sound morals till he marries them out.”
This will serve as a special reward for them teaching their children appropriately and bring them up with a clear understanding of what purity and chastity is. On the contrary, people who allow their kids or their spouses live an immoral lifestyle cannot be considered trustworthy, and so they might not even see the paradise whatsoever. They are believed not to deserve such an honor.
Parents are said to be teaching and bringing their children, especially female ones, in such a way that they won’t even think of losing their virginity before marriage, and especially not with a non-Muslim man. They should be striving to save it until the day the are lawfully wedded and ready to give it as a present to their husband. “They must be made to know and understand the implication of carelessly losing their virginity and the importance of keeping it intact till they reach maturity age of getting married so that they are not discriminated against when looking for marriage partners in the future.”
This is only once in a lifetime gift, and one should guide it carefully. And finally, after a raise of awareness that more and more women who want to get married to Muslim men in Europe go through the hymen restoration process to cover the fact that they are no longer virgins, Sheikh Yaser Birjas comments on the rough reaction of publicity to the fact that virginity is necessary to get married.
“Asking for a 'virginity test' is something new in the Muslim society due to the social change occurring as a result of the proximity with western culture. It’s hard to find anything regarding this issue in such a straight forward manner in classical works of fiqh, for such a request implies suspicion in the chastity of the woman and hence falls under 'Qadhf' false accusation. The rules of Shariah are based on 'sitr' concealing blemishes when possible and promoting chastity. Therefore, unmarried women are assumed as virgins unless a shred of evidence suggests otherwise. Women are not obligated to prove their virginity, but if it appeared to their husbands, they were not virgin then an explanation is required if requested by the husband or his or her wali. The husband has no right to go around speaking ill against her, and he would have the option to dissolve the marriage and take his mahr back or stay with her in that condition.”
And finally here is what this man says about the process of restoration the hymen: “If the reason behind the loss of the hymen was accidental with no haram act involved then it's permissible. In some cases, a doctor provides the patient with a letter attesting for the reason of this unexpected loss. There would be some disagreement among contemporary scholars if the reason were rape, but absolutely wrong if the woman was a fornicator, divorcee or widow.”
Given that these people are better acknowledged with the facts, we have decided to share their opinion on this to prevent any misunderstandings and to present the concepts from the Quran on this issue correctly. To find more facts and read more comments by people we have mentioned in this article, you can search for their materials and study what we did not add to this article given the word limit. Hopefully, this information was useful to you.
- READ ALSO: What happens after you lose your virginity?